All these PhDs and they expect me to come in on my remote day

How fricking dumb are PhDs to email me late at night on Sunday asking me to drive 2 hours to a job I actively want to get fired from without being too obvious?

They're supposed to be some of the smartest people in the country but still haven't figured out that the faster I get fired, the faster I can frick off to Goombling and doing nothing. I didn't respond to their emails because I wasn't be a fricking loser and drinking all night with friends, something they know nothing about. They'll be lucky I sign into teams on time, luckier if I'm not shitfaced drunk and even luckier if I actually listen to what they have to say.