The reason for this is that I went through this ADHD tips site that had multiple articles and all the tips advised were relevant to me.
Then on top of that I went through all the symptoms of ADHD and I feel like I match with 33-50% of it but then I try to remember back and feel like I was taught over time to stop a lot of my ADHD habits across my teenage years and even young adulthood.
I think my parents did a good enough job of raising me that most of my symptoms got masked to the point that I was still failing at life but still did not feel like I had some actual medical condition even if I constantly felt like something was wrong with how I was connecting to people and the world.
Anyways the other problem is that I am very good at reading books. Like I could read a 300 page book in a day across multiple days over a week when I was a kid as it made me feel good about myself and I loved fiction.
I also know loads of information about multiple fictional universes lore ( Halo, Destiny, Isaac Asimov connected universe, 40k, a few bits of warhammer fantasy ) which I realize normal people don't do.
I also appear to have a high verbal IQ as far as I can gather ( only in English though ) and a high general IQ ( I took the IQ test multiple times however so I don't know if I should count that ). I am also good at abstracting concepts but bad at math.
I require things to always have a cause and effect explanation and do have trouble falling asleep.
I also when I think tend to completely zone out the noise and sights around me. Which apparently is also an ADHD symptom as I tried this noise thing where I noticed that instead of my thoughts taking over my entire mind and functions, now with the noise I could hear the thoughts at the back of my head while still being aware of my environment. I realized that's how normies must perceive the world.
So anyways, I am almost definitely sure that I have adhd, pretty sure I would fall within the ASD segment as well due to at times having trouble with socialization due to lack of experience and being unable to comprehend how others perceive me except the things I learned via active study, and slightly confident that I have a very high IQ.
This does in terms of self diagnosis make me twice exceptional indisputably. ( First exceptional - ADHD , Second exceptional - specialized knowledge about random things but also my strong and profound r-sluration skills and ability to wordswordswords post long texts every single day without much difficulty once the anxiety went away and my great verbal memory which I displayed in earlier posts where I was able to track like 300-400+ words on the little game where that number wasn't even on the list. So my second exceptional gifts were blocked off by my anxiety and the low self esteem and difficulty focusing because of the tism. )
My question to you guys is where do I go from here.
I figured out what's wrong with me with a 90% certainly. I know the solutions. But like now can I stop trying to pretend to be like other humans or what? Do I announce every time I go into a new room that I am ADHD. Do I just work to mask way harder until I am a normie. Or should I double confirm by getting me the ADHD medication and seeing if that has an effect on me?
Thanks for your input.
Good luck to me and good luck to you.
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Getting diagnosed won't help with anything unless you want to get on medication. I think that shit should be avoided at all costs but it's your life not mine.
Just be a sperg. Try to find a spergy hobby so you mostly interact with fellow spergs. They will be less judgemental because they too will just be happy you're willing to tolerate them.
You're not gonna be able to hide it and medication will just make it so you care less that other people notice. So just
yourself.
If you're capable of that, yes.
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Why do you think the medication should be avoided? Yeah, I too would like to not be diagnosed with weird r-slur (tm)
But I also want to be a member of society and have an actual future.
I live in an East Asian adjacent culture where saving face matters.
If I was capable of that would I be a rdrama poster?
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I have seen the drugs people get from their therapists turn them into mindless zombies. I'd rather be depressed than r-slurred. Adderall is the only one I don't see doing that but they get brain fog after a few years just like recreational stimulant enjoyers.
I don't have enough experience with this to tell you not to worry about it, but I can tell you that your written English is better than most native speakers. I'd imagine you could find work as a translator or tutor in an English speaking country. You'll catch some strange looks for being an immigrant, but it'll also cover for a lot of your idiosyncrasies.
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I agree. I don't want to lose my thinking abilities.
I don't want that. Alright no drugs for me. I brute force the cure by living method.
Thank you for the compliment.
Maybe that is what I will try for. Give the English immigration paper then apply to be an English teacher abroad. I will keep it in mind as one of my backups.
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