The reason for this is that I went through this ADHD tips site that had multiple articles and all the tips advised were relevant to me.
Then on top of that I went through all the symptoms of ADHD and I feel like I match with 33-50% of it but then I try to remember back and feel like I was taught over time to stop a lot of my ADHD habits across my teenage years and even young adulthood.
I think my parents did a good enough job of raising me that most of my symptoms got masked to the point that I was still failing at life but still did not feel like I had some actual medical condition even if I constantly felt like something was wrong with how I was connecting to people and the world.
Anyways the other problem is that I am very good at reading books. Like I could read a 300 page book in a day across multiple days over a week when I was a kid as it made me feel good about myself and I loved fiction.
I also know loads of information about multiple fictional universes lore ( Halo, Destiny, Isaac Asimov connected universe, 40k, a few bits of warhammer fantasy ) which I realize normal people don't do.
I also appear to have a high verbal IQ as far as I can gather ( only in English though ) and a high general IQ ( I took the IQ test multiple times however so I don't know if I should count that ). I am also good at abstracting concepts but bad at math.
I require things to always have a cause and effect explanation and do have trouble falling asleep.
I also when I think tend to completely zone out the noise and sights around me. Which apparently is also an ADHD symptom as I tried this noise thing where I noticed that instead of my thoughts taking over my entire mind and functions, now with the noise I could hear the thoughts at the back of my head while still being aware of my environment. I realized that's how normies must perceive the world.
So anyways, I am almost definitely sure that I have adhd, pretty sure I would fall within the ASD segment as well due to at times having trouble with socialization due to lack of experience and being unable to comprehend how others perceive me except the things I learned via active study, and slightly confident that I have a very high IQ.
This does in terms of self diagnosis make me twice exceptional indisputably. ( First exceptional - ADHD , Second exceptional - specialized knowledge about random things but also my strong and profound r-sluration skills and ability to wordswordswords post long texts every single day without much difficulty once the anxiety went away and my great verbal memory which I displayed in earlier posts where I was able to track like 300-400+ words on the little game where that number wasn't even on the list. So my second exceptional gifts were blocked off by my anxiety and the low self esteem and difficulty focusing because of the tism. )
My question to you guys is where do I go from here.
I figured out what's wrong with me with a 90% certainly. I know the solutions. But like now can I stop trying to pretend to be like other humans or what? Do I announce every time I go into a new room that I am ADHD. Do I just work to mask way harder until I am a normie. Or should I double confirm by getting me the ADHD medication and seeing if that has an effect on me?
Thanks for your input.
Good luck to me and good luck to you.
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look ive had a few beers and no food, so obviously im hella frickin qualified for this
do you ever binge something for a few days and put like 30 hours in 3 days? difficulty with eye-contact?
you probably have the 'tism at least to an extent, what about socializing in person? thats a pretty decent chunk of it
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He doesn't have autism
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What makes you so sure? Explain yourself.
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clearly i need more alcohol
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I checked out the same 40k lore subreddit every single day across two to three years does that count?
No I have never in my life done anything continuously for 30 hours in 3 days except for that one time I learned to type around 60 to 70 words per minute over the course of a few days and that other time I tried to play continuous chess over multiple days until I had a mini breakdown because rank no go up because that's not how you learn chess. So yeah I do sometimes feel so guilt about the slow rate of change that I hyper fixate on completing a single thing that doesn't make me nervous or anxious.
I had difficulty with eye contact yes. I keep working on it every single day. I am almost as good as a normie at it now as I keep getting better at simulating outside perspectives.
I don't really socialize in person due to not having people around to socialize much with. I have tried to socialize far more now but I am only able to approach people when I have a function or action in mind or to assist them in some way. I have gotten better at it with practice. Right now I check on some neighbors exactly once a week on a sort of stable schedule and have specific dates once a week or once a month to contact and speak with friends across time.
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(should have reworded, i meant 30 hours over 3 days or so)
yeah this is reinforcing autism being likely to me, i mean shit, obviously everyone is different, but i do get those same issues as a diagnosed sperg. (tho isnt there overlap with adhd/tism? idk)
would definitely look into it eventually though, even if it ends up just being adhd just getting on meds would probably make a huge change
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There is.
True.
I would have liked to have enough earnings before hand before getting myself the diagnosis but maybe I just need to take the bullet and get the diagnosis first, the medicine to normie brain me so that I can then unfrick life enough to succeed even from where I am standing.
If I can improve myself every single day being an unmedicated sperg, I am very confident if you gave me the normie inducing medication you could max out my ubermenschen nature.
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if you have autism its already too late.
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I have developed enough self awareness to realize I have had women fall out of love with me as they realized that I had nowhere to push for the next step in a way that made sense. The tism really becomes visible once you go into personal life section and forming strong intimate bonds.
I am surprisingly likeable on a 1 to 1 basis though at least with the friends who hung around.
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unironically blame your parents
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Why?
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autism is not acquired. Its congenital, probably genetics and/or exposure to some nasty chemicals, I wonder why the rate of autism is increasing alongside neurodegenerative disease
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I dont even have an opinion but this part
Kinda says autism to me. Im not a professional but the lack of social interaction and the reluctant highly scheduled socialization is what I would imagine autism is (even tho ive never looked into)
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I have to set up interaction dates because a lot of my friends are not available for day to day video calls they have busy lives.
i like getting along with people, I don't like being around people unless I know they actually enjoy my company.
Yeah as I said in my self diagnosis, gifted adhd autism mix but like all three at the lower to mid dose side of the spectrum.
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yea ur not a complete sperg but u got a healthy peppering. also
thats up for debate isn't it
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I can words words words post better than almost any other person except Kaamrev can't I.
Also I do imagine you have to be honestly gifted to be able to be a sperg and still be able to actively improve yourself bit by bit.
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improve yourself according to who
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Am I improving in life?
!slots100
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According to me and the fact that my words posting has continued to reach increasing coherence over time if you go through my posting history and my daily life goals keep and day to day routine keeps scaling up.
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