Merry Christmas, motherlover! I just gave birth to the fricking antichrist

I just woke up from a fricking crazy nightmare where I became mysteriously pregnant and everyone said it was a fricking miracle but I knew the fricking truth.

After a fricking horrible pregnancy, I gave birth to a fricking demon baby and I kept thinking I should kill it because it was fricking evil before it brought about the fricking end of mankind but my mother was fricking SO fricking happy about her grandchild. Later on, the fricking demon child talked her into killing herself so then I drowned it. Then my father blamed me for both deaths and everyone was fricking appalled at what a fricking monster I am.

Anyway, now I have to go downstairs and help my sister in law cook for Christmas dinner.