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There's a guy in my apartment block who goes out into the stairwell to smoke all the time and uses an old coffee tin to put the ash into. Somebody left a turd in the tin and the community management just called me and told me the police are investigating.

His smoke fricking stank the whole building out and would sometimes leak into my apartment but I was born in the PRC so I'm used to selfish buttholes doing the frick what they want. I heard some other people shouting at this guy in Cantonese and whenever I passed him on the stairs (we have an elevator but I like to climb to avoid :marseychonker2: what with all the oily, greasy food around here) he looked a bit subnormal so I paid it no mind. Somebody else apparently felt different. There are cameras on every landing so, if they don't know who did it, that means the cameras are duds. I may use that to my advantage in the future.

89
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Photo evidence? Dog turd or man turd?

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Photo evidence was never provided. This was all made up.

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Factcheck: WARNING! THIS CLAIM HAS BEEN CLASSIFIED AS DANGEROUS. PLEASE REMAIN STILL, AN AGENT WILL COME TO MEET YOU SHORTLY.

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bro change ur profile color to the Twitter blue color

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This is really :marseythinkorino2: unacceptable how you both assumed the gender :marseypassftm: AND species :marseyhank: of the turd.

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:#marseyrudolph2:

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Reindeer turd? :marseysuspi#cious:

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In my first apartment we had reports of homeless people entering the building and pooping up the halls. Landlord told us to be on the lookout and always make sure the doors were latched and locked. One day i get woken up with loud knocking by the landlord asking me where my roommate was. We had a closet out in the hallway where we put our trash for some lady to pick up during the night. My roommate got caught by rhe trash lady taking a shit in the hall closet... turns out he was the homeless hallway shitter the whole time

I mostly stopped letting homeless people live with me after that

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the guy in the apartment below me smokes cigs in his bathroom and the smell comes up thru the vents so my bathroom smells like cigs half the time. he also likes to randomly scream (never any words, just BAUGHGGGGHHHH!!!)

but i smoke weed in mine and play guitar until 3 am so who am i to complain

:mar#sey#shru###g:


:marsey#spiderman: spider gang for life :marsey#!spiderman:

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I may use that to my advantage in the future

By pooping in that guy's tin can too? :crap:

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Delivery guys leave parcels outside doors...

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How many parcels can you shit on in a single day?

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They installed a dud camera :marseyjourno: and a "no pissing :marseyseizure: here, camera" sign at my entrance to keep the hobos from shidding and pissing :marseyseizure: in front :marseyviewerstare: of the first :marseywinner: security :marseysecuritron: gate.

https://i.rdrama.net/images/17032473142114265.webp

Willkommen in Monnem longas !germs

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community management just called me and told me the police are investigating.

They think it was you.

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Of course they do. I'm a mainlander.

I'll demand they DNA test the turd.

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It's not just mainlanders who like to send messages via turds. A buddy of mine lives in Taiwan, and locals keep taking dumps in the middle of the jumps of the downhill MTB course they'd built.

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:crap: :#marseydetective:

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Thank you for reminding us all why all poors should be ground into a meat slurry

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Santa came early!

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Guy should just buy his own home like I did. Then, because of the freedom of property law, you can smoke wherever you want, i.e., wherever your wife tells you it's okay to smoke, which is either on the front porch on most days or, as a concession, in the garage on cold days.

Or you can be like my neighbor four houses down: he just goes in his truck and effectively hotboxes for 30 minutes at a time. Plus, he makes Greta mad by having the truck idle the entire time.

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I think this belongs in /h/peakpoors rather than in /h/random

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Hey, I'm only staying in HK until my contract ends. This is where the company put me.

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This is where the company put me.

:#marseywagie:

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Reacher Season 3: The Turd in the Ashtray

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