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There is going to be another day where I feel like im the dumbest software engineer

but then I'll remember at least I didnt push a null driver into prod

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:marseyemojirofl: !codecels Motivation to live in this thread

https://i.rdrama.net/images/17214453604529536.webp

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:marseyclown3#:


https://media.tenor.com/s91B_Rm3fEQAAAAx/merry-christmas-to-all-my-facebook-anf-family-celebration.webp

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Holy frick its even worse than I realized.

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I love cloud kernel drivers!

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I'm not an ITchad, but I'd like to learn more.

What does that mean in real terms?

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tldr a company released an update that blanked out an incredibly important piece of code and now computers wont boot

less tldr, crowdstrike is a company that protects businesses from ransomware and viruses. they do this with a program called falcon, which uses a piece of code thats runs the moment you boot your computer. whats happening is this:

computer boots :marseyloading: -> tries to read this piece of code :marseyreading: -> freaks the frick out because the code is blank and it doesn't know what to do:marseyveryworried: -> reboots :marseyloadingneon:

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Thank you, that makes it clear. I wonder how something like that could possibly be allowed to happen.

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I wonder how something like that could possibly be allowed to happen

Complacency because previous updates worked

Process focused on quickly producing changes

Completely ignoring test automation because that's gay and that's what we hired Ranjeet (incompetent, thirdie) for

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Used to be in test automation. All the shit US devs hated us because their shit code wouldn't pass. "Uhhhh but how do we know it wasn't your tests failing?" Because it's a five-line stack trace, you fricking r-slur.

As I was on my way out, they were replacing us with a bunch of Hyderabad devs. I hesitate to know the state of whatever the frick they put out now.

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Devs should be checking in tested code. It's in their selfish interest and also it makes for less error-prone working conditions. Unfortunately that's an ideal and a lot of devs I come across don't think that way, but then this gay bullshit happens and it's kinda stressful and then people wish something had been done

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It's a tough problem to solve because there is a twofold problem of devs fricking up when times are good and management fricking up when times are tough.

My favorite, of course, is management reacting to that crossroad with "where is the quality?" while playing annoying office politics that deter anyone from speaking up.

I bully other devs often, but bullying management is a dangerous game.

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the tests only fail on my machine when running the code i just wrote but im like pretty sure its a false positive so like could you just approve it?

:#marseyclown3:

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He missed out the best part:

The computers downloaded the bad code

The computers can't boot any more

The computers can't download the fixed code

Fleets set up to re-image over netboot or something like that could be fixed without too much trouble, but most machines hit with this are going to need someone to sit down in front of them and fix them manually

Could take days just to travel to some of them

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I wonder how something like that could possibly be allowed to happen.

I'm sure the devs at Crowdstrike are wondering that too :marseyxd:

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God bless my IT team. Got like 7 emails in the middle of the night about it and the last one was "all good now, if you do have issues just contact us". We were down for a bit and my guys on night shift went through heck for a few hours but not too bad honestly

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Perhaps in 2024 we should finally fix computers so they can store and retrieve data from 0x0

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Wut

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crowdstrike is a company that protects businesses from ransomware and viruses. they do this with a program called falcon, which uses a piece of code thats runs the moment you boot your computer. whats happening is this:

computer boots :marseyloading: -> tries to read this piece of code :marseyreading: -> freaks the frick out because the code is blank and it doesn't know what to do:marseyveryworried: -> reboots :marseyloadingneon:

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So can you fix it by changing the boot sequence, switching off Falcon, and reverting to an older version?

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I don't know what this means but it sounds dumb

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I live in a CIA prison. A BIPOC runs my prison. In prison, the BIPOC tries to torment me. We can take away his knives by confessing, every day. In about 2000, I masturbated fantasizing about my niece, Lani. She looks like star trek seven of nine! In 1985, at my sister's wedding, I stuck my crotch on the hot tub drain because it kind of sucked. In 1985, I tried to get a dog to lick my peepee. From 1998-2003, I fantasized about leading a catholic army like dune, of mexicans or brazilians? that was dumb because they're BIPOCs. In 2003, I played tag with a black girl about 7-years-old. she reached for my crotch. In high school, in the library, Carlos and I said juicy or toxic as a way of evaluating girls. In 1988, I cheated on my SAT by talking in the hall during the break -- two problems. On 9/9/1999, I killed a CIA BIPOC on purpose with my car. :-) In 1982, when I was 12, I babysat Kevin's kids. I changed a diaper because I thought that was being professional. In 1975, when I was about the age five, my brother, Keith, put my peepee in a vacuum. In 1977, when I was about age seven, my brother, Danny, got me high on gas fumes and we sucked each others peepees. Dr. Tsakalis has an oddly round butt. Paul Keck at Xytex had a oddly round butt. Distracting? At about age five, Jay Weinrick and I touched disks to each other's buttholes.

Snapshots:

https://x.com/christian_tail/status/1814299095261147448:

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