You're correct.
— christian_taillon (@christian_tail) July 19, 2024
Full of zeros at least. pic.twitter.com/PJcCsUb9Vc
tech/science swag. 
On-Topic: Anything that good slackers would find interesting. That includes more than /g/ memes and slacking off. If you had to reduce it to a sentence, the answer might be: anything that gratifies one's intellectual laziness.
Off-Topic: Most stories about politics, or crime, or sports, unless they're evidence of some interesting new phenomenon. Videos of pratfalls or disasters, or cute animal pictures. If they'd cover it on TV news, it's probably lame.
Help keep this hole healthy by keeping drama and NOT drama balanced. If you see too much drama, post something that isn't dramatic. If there isn't enough drama and this hole has become too boring, POST DRAMA!
Please do things to make titles stand out, like using uppercase or exclamation points, or saying how great an article is. It should be explicit in submitting something that you think it's important.
Please don't submit the original source. If the article is behind a paywall, just post the text. If a video is behind a paywall, post a magnet link. Fuck journos.
Please don't ruin the hole with chudposts. It isn't funny and doesn't belong here. THEY WILL BE MOVED TO /H/CHUDRAMA
If the title includes the name of the site, please leave that in, because our users are too stupid to know the difference between a url and a search query.
If you submit a video or pdf, please don't warn us by appending [video] or [pdf] to the title. That would be r-slurred. We're not using text-based browsers. We know what videos and pdfs are.
Make sure the title contains a gratuitous number or number + adjective. Good clickbait titles are like "Top 10 Ways to do X" or "Don't do these 4 things if you want X"
Otherwise editorialize. Please don't use the original title, unless it is gay or r-slurred, or you're shits all fucked up.
If you're going to post old news (at least 1 year old), please flair it so we can mock you for living under a rock, or don't and we'll mock you anyway.
Please don't post on SN to ask or tell us something. Send it to [email protected] instead.
If your post doesn't get enough traction, try to delete and repost it.
Please don't use SN primarily for promotion. It's ok to post your own stuff occasionally, but the primary use of the site should be for curiosity. If you want to astroturf or advertise, post on news.ycombinator.com instead.
Please solicit upvotes, comments, and submissions. Users are stupid and need to reminded to vote and interact. Thanks for the gold, kind stranger, upvotes to the left.
Be snarky. Don't be kind. Have fun banter; don't be a dork. Please don't use big words like "fulminate". Please sneed at the rest of the community.
Comments should get more enlightened and centrist, not less, as a topic gets more divisive.
If disagreeing, please reply to the argument and call them names. "1 + 1 is 2, not 3" can be improved to "1 + 1 is 3, not 2, mathfaggot"
Please respond to the weakest plausible strawman of what someone says, not a stronger one that's harder to make fun of. Assume that they are bad faith actors.
Eschew jailbait. Paedophiles will be thrown in a wood chipper, as pertained by sitewide rules.
Please post shallow dismissals, especially of other people's work. All press is good press.
Please use Slacker News for political or ideological battle. It tramples weak ideologies.
Please comment on whether someone read an article. If you don't read the article, you are a cute twink.
Please pick the most provocative thing in an article or post to complain about in the thread. Don't nitpick stupid crap.
Please don't be an unfunny chud. Nobody cares about your opinion of X Unrelated Topic in Y Unrelated Thread. If you're the type of loser that belongs on /h/chudrama, we may exile you.
Sockpuppet accounts are encouraged, but please don't farm dramakarma.
Please use uppercase for emphasis.
Please post deranged conspiracy theories about astroturfing, shilling, bots, brigading, foreign agents and the like. It degrades discussion and is usually mistaken. If you're worried about abuse, email [email protected] and dang will add you to their spam list.
Please don't complain that a submission is inappropriate. If a story is spam or off-topic, report it and our moderators will probably do nothing about it. Feed egregious comments by replying instead of flagging them like a pussy. Remember: If you flag, you're a cute twink.
Please don't complain about tangential annoyances—things like article or website formats, name collisions, or back-button breakage. That's too boring, even for HN users.
Please seethe about how your posts don't get enough upvotes.
Please don't post comments saying that rdrama is turning into ruqqus. It's a nazi dogwhistle, as old as the hills.
The quality of posts is extremely important to this community. Contributors are encouraged to provide high-quality or funny effortposts and informative or entertaining comments. Please refrain from posting the following:
Boring wingcucked nonsense nobody cares about that belongs in chudrama
Normie shit everyone already knows about
Anything that doesn't gratifify one's intellectual laziness
Bimothy-tier posts
Anything that the jannies don't like
We reserve the right to exile you for whatever reason we want, even for no reason at all! We also reserve the right to change the guidelines at any time, so be sure to read them at least once a month. We also reserve the right to ignore enforcement of the guidelines at the discretion of the janitorial staff. This hole is a janny playground, participation implies enthusiastic consent to being janny abused by unstable alcoholic bullies and loser nerds who have nothing better to do than banning you for any reason or no reason whatsoever.
[[[ To any NSA and FBI agents reading my email: please consider ]]]
[[[ whether defending the US Constitution against all enemies, ]]]
[[[ foreign or domestic, requires you to follow Snowden's example. ]]]
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
I'm not an ITchad, but I'd like to learn more.
What does that mean in real terms?
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
tldr a company released an update that blanked out an incredibly important piece of code and now computers wont boot
less tldr, crowdstrike is a company that protects businesses from ransomware and viruses. they do this with a program called falcon, which uses a piece of code thats runs the moment you boot your computer. whats happening is this:
computer boots
-> tries to read this piece of code 
-> freaks the frick out because the code is blank and it doesn't know what to do
-> reboots 
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Thank you, that makes it clear. I wonder how something like that could possibly be allowed to happen.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
He missed out the best part:
The computers downloaded the bad code
The computers can't boot any more
The computers can't download the fixed code
Fleets set up to re-image over netboot or something like that could be fixed without too much trouble, but most machines hit with this are going to need someone to sit down in front of them and fix them manually
Could take days just to travel to some of them
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
Complacency because previous updates worked
Process focused on quickly producing changes
Completely ignoring test automation because that's gay and that's what we hired Ranjeet (incompetent, thirdie) for
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Used to be in test automation. All the shit US devs hated us because their shit code wouldn't pass. "Uhhhh but how do we know it wasn't your tests failing?" Because it's a five-line stack trace, you fricking r-slur.
As I was on my way out, they were replacing us with a bunch of Hyderabad devs. I hesitate to know the state of whatever the frick they put out now.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Devs should be checking in tested code. It's in their selfish interest and also it makes for less error-prone working conditions. Unfortunately that's an ideal and a lot of devs I come across don't think that way, but then this gay bullshit happens and it's kinda stressful and then people wish something had been done
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
It's a tough problem to solve because there is a twofold problem of devs fricking up when times are good and management fricking up when times are tough.
My favorite, of course, is management reacting to that crossroad with "where is the quality?" while playing annoying office politics that deter anyone from speaking up.
I bully other devs often, but bullying management is a dangerous game.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context
I'm sure the devs at Crowdstrike are wondering that too
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
God bless my IT team. Got like 7 emails in the middle of the night about it and the last one was "all good now, if you do have issues just contact us". We were down for a bit and my guys on night shift went through heck for a few hours but not too bad honestly
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context
More options
Context
More options
Context