Foids Posting L's

I can't see my husband because of the shame I feel after we both fulfilled a fantasy of mine.

Probably karma farming coombait fanfiction but still lmao.

I got up and remembered everything we did, I was stunned and my face turned red with shame, I don't know How to approach the subject today when I see it, or if we need to talk about it, last night we gave each other a lot of affection after s*x and we went to sleep, and I remember that this morning he woke me up to tell me that He loved me before he left.

It seems stupid but the truth is I'm quite embarrassed even though it was all my idea, what do I do or say? Did I talk to him about it? Please help, has anyone had the same thing happen? How do you approach it? or did you let things flow? Because the truth is I would like to repeat it but I am embarrassed to bring up the subject.

Edit: Since many are asking in the comments and I already said in once: it was r*pe roleplay with me as the victim, yes, we had our limits and safe word clarified, and yes, the contradiction of begging to stop at the same time I was having the best moment of my life are too much for now, specially knowing it's quite a sensitive topic, I just believe I went a little to far with my sub kink and I feel ashamed I enjoyed it a lot and even want to be "r*ped" again, the very idea makes me feel aroused and ashamed at the same time.

The first time my man spited on my face was accidentally because he pointed to the garbage box

Yes, he apologized immediately, but something awakened inside me

I suppose is not for everyone, it can be gross for some people