Holy shit, the Boston Massacre was just a cop defending himself from a dindu. THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION WAS A BLM RIOT

OKAY after writing this i realized this has already been done but idc

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So an american kid harasses an officer for no reason except he's a little shithead. FAFO, the officer gives him a well-deserved slap.

What's wrong with that?

(also it may not have even happened)

But then hundreds of white trash 'muricans run out and surround these cops screaming "SHOOT ME NEIGHBOR SHOOT ME"

this was “most probably a motley rabble of saucy boys, negroes and molattoes, Irish teagues and outlandish jack tars. — And why we should scruple to call such a set of people a mob, I can't conceive, unless the name is too respectable for them.

“Fire, darn you! Fire, you lobsters! Fire! You dare not fire!” This dare makes sense issued from a crowd of a hundred. Eight soldiers holding guns with bayonets is a threatening array, but each musket can only hold one bullet at a time.

Lobster = Pig

"The British are LITERALLY Nazis! George III is a Cathofascist (red man bad)!" - colonial Antifa

and they start throwing rocks, which btw, is illegal

after an hour of pelting, they knock an officer down and Crispus Attacks (Michael Brown) allegedly tries to rush them

our cops shoot him+ in self-defense

At one point, a stick hit a soldier hard enough to knock him over. When he stood up, he immediately fired.

Paul Revere was fake news CNN. He made Crispus Attucks, literally the only black guy there, into a dindu nuffin' and called it a mostly peaceful protest.

Thy hallow'd walks besmear'd with guiltless gore

Like fierce barbarians grinning o'er their prey

The patriot's copious tears for each are shed

Crispus Attucks, & Patr. Carr Killed

naturally, this caused massive chimpouts, property damage, and mass murder.

In conclusion, the American revolution was a BLM riot.

#BostonianLivesMatter