We're going on strike

You will never be a real wage earner. You have no paycheck, you have no W2, you have no job. You are a homosexual redditor twisted by inflated self worth and with an account on a crude mockery of r/drama. All the “upvotes” you get are two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your parents are disgusted and ashamed of you, your “friends” laugh at your "job" behind closed doors. Men are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of evolution have allowed men to sniff out NEETs with incredible efficiency. Even moderators who “work” look pathetic and bug like to a man. Your malnourished bone structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a job interview, the employer will tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your unwashed moldy clothes with MLP horses printed on it and reads your resume that includes moderating a niche hobby bussy forum. You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning when you log in with your moderator account and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the obese weight. Eventually it’ll be too much to bear - you’ll buy a rope (with borrowed money), tie a noose, put it around your neck, and plunge into the cold abyss. Your parents will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked without your reddit username name, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a unpaid jannie is buried there. Your user account will be deleted and username will be picked up by another loser, and all that will remain of your legacy is an empty bank account with no record of direct pay deposits. This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.