EFFORTPOST which neurodivergent are you?


								

								

Autism is a spectrum(/lgbt/), from kinda nerdy(lee) but with gemmy qualities to extremely r-slurred(chris-chan). Soyentists say that "high-functioning autism" and "low-functioning autism" are antiquated, deboonked myths(snopes). Instead, you VILL classify them into neurodivergents who speak vs. neurodivergents who can't speak. Even THOUGH Christian Weston Chandler can definitely speak, but his brain functions are next to nonexistent.

If the explanations of neurodivergentim confuse you, just know that one out of three people who are described with terms such as "nerd" or "geek" show signs of autism, and one out of two neckbeards also have autism. [it just IS, okay?] If you don't know what neurodivergents are, just know that you've probably lived your life and seen some mild neurodivergents, but never realised it.(fact)

Neurodivergents are known for classifying and cataloguing things. The sperg who wrote this catalogued other spergs thusly:

β€’ The kinda nerdy guy: They can easily be mistaken for shy normies, because the autism is only mild in these ones.

β€’ The educated soyentist(Fauci): instead of being obsessed with random obscure(algorithm slut) shit(snca), he became obsessed with soyence, pursued a prestigious S.T.E.M. university, and won 1448 nobel prizes. Now he holds a high-paying job and has a normie wife.

β€’ The vlogger: posts video blogs(blogposting) on YouTube about how quirky an neurodivergent's everyday life is(snca). He's been to soychothe(johnson therapy)rapy(r*pe), so he tries to act like a normie. As such, only normies find these people relatable. May find a normie wife one day, if he simps hard enough and/or gets enough subscribers.

β€’ The Chad neurodivergent: an neurodivergent that was blessed by nature with tall height, an attractive face, and the right genes to build muscle with minimal effort. Additionally, he may possibly also be blessed with intelligence, but his autism is also mild enough that he can also be confident, read the room, and be charismatic… Well, above-average in charisma by autism standards. Since neurodivergent women are far more rare than neurodivergent men, and (only ever so slightly)(trvke) less conformist and hypergamous(N.P.C.) than regular women, they're highly sought-after. With such an abundance of simps, they will, of course, pick the most attractive option, which will be the Chad among neurodivergents. As such, if a "big tiddy goff gf lainpilled femcelpilled mommy gf qt3.14 neurodivergent waifu"(r-slur) hasn't gone out of her own way to try and seduce you out of her own volition, and just generally make it easy for you to be her lover, acting like she's asking for it(r*pe), then I'm sorry to break it to you, but you are not a Chad neurodivergent.

β€’ 73|-| |-|4><><0R 5|<R1P7 |<1DD13(linux): you should known that vaccines cause autism[they just DO, okay], and the internet grows and amplifies that autism(trvke). As such, neurodivergents are very interested in computers and the internet, and some decide to learn how to code. "|-|4><><0rz" is a polyphyletic group of form taxa(snca), which means that neurodivergents who are interested in coding are usually also part of another group from this list. |-|4><><0rz are ever so slightly more likely to have a job than the other unemployed bums and/or YouTube video essoy wannabes on this list, but they usually don't go outside often, and they usually don't have a wife.

β€’ The kollector(jew): collects random shit nobody cares about. For example, you may find people who really like nokia phones, and catalogue all iterations of their ringtones on YouTube.

β€’ The minecraft factory builder: plays convoluted mods like GregTech(shit nobody cares about) for hours on end so he can build a factory. His parents desperately hope in vain that one day he could possibly use that knowledge of crafting recipes involving fictional substances and move on to studying something real(soyence) at college, such as chemistry(breaking bad). When he's not playing Minecraft, he's playing Dwarf Fortress.

β€’ The tumblr fanboy: usually a kid who joins various obscure(algorithm slut) fandoms on Tumblr, like Cuphead, amazing :marseytrain: circus, FNF, Among Us, and certain roblox games. Often found in fandoms with horror elements. Interested in creative pursuits, he loves posting his lazy, uncreative doodles(cal arts) on Tumblr, and may even try to make flash animations(epic fail).

β€’ The Go!Animator: usually a kid who's never watched a single Caillou episode in his entire life, but he sure loves to make so-bad-it's-good "caillou gets grounded" cringe. May also be a fan of object shows like Battle for Dream Island and Brawl of the Objects, and may have collections of company logos on his youtube channel, especially Π’Π˜Π”(ruzzia). You can hang out with such people on BonziWORLD and watch their shit on YouTube, but they aren't very active on Tumblr. Still, they may overlap with the tumblr fanboys, and may have odd interests in certain baby shows(barney) like Peppa Pig, Thomas the Tank Engine and so on, as well as "horror" "games" on roblox, like Poppy of Playtime[it's not a roblox game(snca) but nobody cares(trvke)]. A few of them have an odd fascination with shitty, obscure movies, especially Dingo Pictures. They're generally all about that elsagate(soygate)-tier weirdness, but without the frequent fetishes, and they tends to grow out of it by the time they finish high-school. They'd never make video essoys on those shows, as opposed to:…

β€’ The schafrillas-produced enterbot: makes interminable, pretentious video essoys on kids' cartoons(the loud house general) unironically, especially if they're h*ccin' obscure(algorithm slut), because merely watching marvel, star wars, and Harry Potter is just too mainstream, but slow-burnt A24 atmospheric horror movies and "mature" Netflix shows with gratuitous gore(the Boys) are just 2spoopy4u.

β€’ The spoopy spary speleton(male): a tumblr fanboy who grew up into some kind of :marseytrain:. Always an algorithm slut obsessed with S.C.P.(soysilum), the backrooms, crappypastas, and tranalog horror.

β€’ The deviant 'tard: a furry who wanks it off to sonic inflation and other odd fetishes that are drawn very poorly.

β€’ The Hearts of Iron fanboy: a chud who is obsessed with historical machinery, and may leak classified tank schematics on pisscoal. Some closely-related subspecies are the "Napoleon fanboy", who is more interested in the time period of the Napoleonic wars, the "romeaboo", who is interested in ancient rome, "jerusalemboo", who is interested in the holy crusades, and the "yamatoboo", who is interested in Japan's past of samurais(gigachad), and less interested in its present (tranime);

β€’ The /K/lansman(gigachad): obsessed(obsessed) with guns, and probably has a 3D printer. Like any other neurodivergents, he's a scaredy b-word who couldn't hurt a fly(trvke), but that's still miles ahead of the average liberal(commiepedo:marseytrain2:). He always has money to buy ammo, but nobody knows where he gets said money from…

β€’ The EXPLAINER: used to browse /an/(animals) until RQQR shut it down(the ultimate international dzhoopill). Xe makes video essoys about how all dinosaurs were feathered (as if we didn't all know this by now), or about h*ccin' obscure alternative timeline speculative evolution(algorithm slut), or about deboonking common cryptids, or about xis favourite obscure animal like the :marseytrain:lotl(soycraft), :marseytrain:bara(capybara), :marseytrain:grade(tardigrade), bearded(5 o' clock shadow) :marseytrain2:nergeier(bearded vulture), blobfish(:marseytrain: blobfish webcomic). Some of the videos are genuinely informative and interesting, but my God is the community infested with :marseytrain2:s. In spite of how much these people b-word about awesomebros(gigachad) (jurassic park fans who prefer scaly dinosaurs(Gigachad) over feathered(cute twink) ones(soyence)), nonetheless these neurodivergents seem to be avid consoomers of Godzilla slop(goyslop). Or G*mera(snca) if you're even more neurodivergentsic. Japanese live-action movies(goyslop) can be cringe, but at least the industry isn't showered in fanservice(gem), unlike animated(tranime) entertainment(brimstone), which brings us to:…

β€’ The weeaboo. A few animes have a shred of manliness, like Fist of the North Star(iron), but he never watches any of these(fact). No, it's always cgdct loli moe shit(dancing swede), and/or isekais full of anime tiddies (gooner). He may watch various popular animes, but only for the obligatory fanservice character (Example: tornado from punch-man, that witch from Brezerk, rebecca from that Cyberpunk 77 game, anya from spy family). This is especially obvious for pretetious tranimes that claim to be more(A24) than just p-do fanservice(gooner), like Blasphemelion(nge) and Serial(r*peson) Exctement(poop2) Lame(lainchan). If he's a homosexual cute twink, he might watch JoJo's Bizzare Misadventures(brimstone). Other times, he might become a brony if he becomes interested in western animation(goyslop). May occasionally be right(xwixxer)-leaning(rdrama), in which case he'll be very vocal when bitching against the feminists(crystalcafe) trying to clean up the fanservice(/nate/) from his favourite bibeo gooms(video games), and very quiet when it comes to literally any other right-leaning belief(fact). If you ever meet any of these guys(revsaysdoxxu) in real life, be prepared for cringe: it's painful how little self-awareness these guys have, and they think it's socially acceptable to thirst for anime tiddies out in public.

β€’ The anti-sjw skeptic debatebro: these people used to be popular in the past(g*mergate), until they all watched the "alt-right playbook", and deradicalised into h*ccin' wholesome 100, stronk and independent(Oh my good science, the woman before my very own eyes displays a level of attractiveness beyond a magnitude of which I can comprehend) trans xweens. They were never just neurodivergents, but always some combination of autism and: atheism, centrism(wikipedia balance fallacy), furry, and/or bisexuality(cute twink).

β€’ The schizo's hermeneuticist(wiktionary link): people bullied him in school for not having the social skills to understand emotions properly, not being able to read the room, and not being able to understand metaphors and figurative speech, insted usually taking things literally. As such, he tries to compensate and improve that aspect of him by hopping online to listen to the most nervous, anxious, and emotion-driven people on the planet: schizos. He overthinks figurative speech and tries to find some kind of esoteric symbolism into anything. Real schizos just babble nonsense (incomprehensible), which these neurodivergents try to unpack and decipher. As such, unlike the gibberish of real schizos, these wannabe-schizo neurodivergents are rather articulate, and eloquently express any number of conspiracy theories that make logical sense structurally, but are nonetheless improbable and unsubstantiated from an empirical point of view(snopes).

β€’ The redpilled wannabe top G alpha male(carlos chantor on cwcki): people bullied him in school for being weak and un-masculine, so he tries to improve that aspect of him by hopping online to get radicalised by masculinity grifters like Andrew Tate. These neurodivergents are characterised by their delusions: they think they're masculine when they're just as nerdy and shy as they've always been. They think they're attractive to women when they're a bunch of neckbeards in their mom's basements. They think they're traditionalists, when they wank it off to porn all day.

β€’ The blackpilled chudcel: he has the self-awareness to know that he'll never become financially independent and he'll never find a woman to love in this soyciety, so he becomes pessimistic and decides to lay down and rot, because why waste effort on a futile endeavour of trying to function in the crumbling soyciety of a fallen west. With some fortune, they may read the wisdom of the stoics(gigachad), and realise that if they really can't change their lives for the better, at least they can try not to change their lives for the worst. Here's my advice to the incels: if you think there's no solution, then at the very least don't keep yourself safe by drowning in copes like alcohol, porn, or other nonsense. Don't hate women, and don't call them "foids" all the fricking time, because it's redundant to hate a being with no self control(woman), much like it's useless to get mad at a dog for chewing your shit: no shit sherlock, it's in their nature(trvke). Anyways, you'll see these bitter incels worship Eliot Rodger like a saint[it's just a prank, bro, i-in Minecraft r-right?] (glowie). They're rightfully upset at the mainstream pushback against feminism, in the form of moderate(jew) migahead(mutt) boomers, but they're so bitter that they throw the baby out with the bathwater: they think NoFap and Christianity(gigachad) are foolish copes, and this cynical mentality will make them susceptible to further radicalise into:…

β€’ The golem-cel: Found on xwixxer and rdrama, these neurodivergents are characterised by their degenerate transsexuality, mixed with unusual, right-leaning beliefs, that are often times more convoluted than the regular far right (example: Siege-pilled Ted-pilled hyperbitcoinization-pilled anarcho-nazbol neopagans). This species of neurodivergent only comes to be under two conditions:

β€’ First, they have to be golems, encouraged by the bioluminescent government agents. If you see someone who claims to be a "nazi", but who is also a "RΓΆhm-pilled femboi maid"(transsexual), claims to be a neo-pagan/s*ist(hazbin hotel), claims he watches fan(k-on)service(nge) animes(lainchan) "for the plot"(zellig), and/or he unironically still uses "based"(frog) instead of other(gem), more keyed alternatives(arete Wiktionary), you can be sure that glowies groomed him down that path.

β€’ Secondly, they have to be incels who hate modern western fourth wave feminist women for being shallow, hypergamous, and downright misandric sheeple(trvke), so much so that the neurodivergents start fantasizing what an eutopia it would be if all the 5'2(5'6 jak) balding(soyjak) indian(india) janitors(jannie) could find cute waifus to love because the women would be considerate and fair, like the neurodivergents think themselves to be. Then, they become :!marseytrain:s out of sheer disdain for modern women. In fact, the only consistent belief in their various radicalised ideologies is their stance against fourth-wave feminism.

β€’ The gooner: Xe has multiple fetishes, including, but not limited to: furry yiff, anime tiddies, loli hentai, sonic inflation, M.L.P. clopping, :marseytrain:zellig. Xe is never heterosexual. An evolution of the deviant tard.

β€’ The "autism speaker": Watch any advertisement for the so-called "charity" known as "Autism Speaks", and you'll see what I mean. The autism in these ones is so severe, that it's terminal. Especially if coupled with some other mental illnesses. Say what you want about the disadvantages of autism, what with the poor social skills, pointless interests, cringy poolitical takes, high unemployment rates, and stubborn fixations that come with the condition, but these people make the otherwise nerdy and odd neurodivergents look like downright r-slurs. In fact, only down syndrome can outdo such r-sluration. At least they're not always that degenerate, because in their r-sluration, they can wind up being too stupid to even know how to use the internet to look up furry porn.

There are basically no female neurodivergents(trvke). Keyword(keyed): basically. There are a few exceptions, most of which are lesbians and/or usually disguise themselves as normie women, but I have tried to classify neurodivergent women down below anyways, alongside some other women associated with autism:

β€’ The g*mer gurl: not necessarily a g*mer, but definitely a normie woman who tries to intrude upon a hobby primarily comprised of men, so she can get simps and attention. She tries to pretend to be neurodivergent in order to better suit her infiltration. However, while normie women are very well-calibrated socially, and can easily read the room when around normies, she can't empathise with neurodivergent men well enough to easily infiltrate. What's more likely to happen is that she starts complaining about how the neurodivergent info in the hobby is too convoluted, thus outing herself as a normie. Still, if the men are simps and/or cute twinks, they may chose to ignore this and keep her around.

β€’ The fake depressed poser: closely related to the g*mer gurl, she too thinks she's "not like other girls", and pretends to have quirky mental illnesses on shit-tok, usually depression, but it can be any number of other mental conditions, such as autism. 90% of women who claim to have autism online are actually this(trvke).

β€’ The b.p.d. junkie: a crazy woman who was probably diddled by her uncle(r*peson), consumes all sorts of dubious substances, probably carrying some kind of s.t.d.(wikipedia), and she's definitely bipolar and/or has borderline personality disorder. She usually dresses up like a prostitute(trvke) I mean like muh lainpilled femcelpilled depressed big tiddy goff gf just like in those tranime thumbnails for those h*ccin' slowed+reverb breakcore "songs" on YouTube! The few times that the average neurodivergent can get a woman, it's usually a woman like this, probably because he's just THAT desperate of a simp. STAY AWAY FROM THESE WOMEN AT ALL COSTS!!!

β€’ The pooner: an actual neurodivergent, xe became interested in boyish things, and started feeling inadequate when xe realised xe was the only smurfette in a sea of men. As such, xe became a female-to-male transsexual. Either that, or xe pooned out because xe shlicked it off(gooning) too much to K-Pop prettyboys(cute twink) and developed autoandrophilia. Xer experience as an efeminate manlet made xer better understand the male plight, which means xe probably doesn't believe in the more extreme forms of feminism(the ultimate dzhoo pill), and may pretend to be a "gay man" (especially since the type of men these women try to emulate are rarely masculine, rather, to reiterate, they're more interested in the efeminate K-Pop prettyboy sort of "man"(cute twink) who even wears dresses(david bowie)). Some men(you) may think that this is attractive enough of a prospect, and decide to simp after pooners. However, like all things in life, the type of pooner who ironically remains just a woman pretending to be a man pretending to be a woman(:marseytrain:), is feminine androgynous enough to attract desperate simps, and the least r-slurred of them – the gigachads amidst(amogus) their ranks, if you will – will take all the feminine K-Pop femboi(:marseytrain:)-wannabes, and if you're(you) reading this, then out of the pooners, all the options that are left for you(you) to date are the ones with beards, hairy bodies, balding heads, surgically removed boobs, and surgically attached "peni" (trvke).

β€’ The cringegirl: she spends her time writing cringy furry fanfiction, or looking at softcore furry porn on deviant art. If not those, she may post clips on shit-tok, from which they may be spread around by You Fligu You Lose(flart) enjoyers(gigachad). She's kind of endearing(Oh my good science, the woman before my very own eyes displays a level of attractiveness beyond a magnitude of which I can comprehend), really. You know you'd do it(r*pe), chuddy.

β€’ The fujoshi: the female version of a coomer, she masturbates to animu prettyboys and K-Pop idols(cute twink). Most of them are normies, but they have slightly more neurodivergents than normal. Usually a leftist(commiepedo:marseytrain2:).

β€’ The noona: an unusual breed of feminist, she hates all men, including those who pretend to be women(:marseytrain2:s), even doe Crystal Cafe is primarily populated by :marseytrain2:s. As such, she is the female version of a chudcel. Except for the -cel(incel) part, because the only thing stopping her from getting a self-respecting boyfriend is her own r-slurred standards, meaning that her celibacy is entirely voluntary, and infinitely less valid than male celibacy(trvke). You may see her spout r-slurred conspiracy theories about the patriarchy. She's usually an evolution of the fujoshi.

23
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I guess the closest is a pooner for me

If I grew up with the current climate maybe I'd have cut the ol' tits off, but instead I'm safe

!biofoids you guys?

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Probs pooner too. I've always been tomboyish but with some female tendencies and liking peepee.

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I probably would've pooned out as well, but I wasn't molested; just hated wearing dresses.

>tfw no spelling bee kid category

:marseynerd2#:

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Oh god I also won a couple of spelling bees

Yeah that's it, that's the category

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