MegaCarp does an unwholesome action, about to be cancelled

You will never be a staple of rdrama culture. You have no humor, you have no bants, you have no funny memes. You are a homosexual newstrag twisted by internetspeak and a desperate bid to fit in into a crude mockery of rdramas perfection. You have a mental illness called newstrag syndrome.

All the "validation" you get is two faced and half hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your parents are disgusted and ashamed of you, your fellow dramanauts laugh at your unfunny schizoposts behind closed doors.

Funny people are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of years of terminal internet use has allowed funny people to sniff out unfunny, dead-on-arrival jokes with incredible efficiency. Even your jokes that "pass" are cringy and forced. Your incessant repitition is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a curious newstrag to look at you, he'll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of your diseased post history.

You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself it's going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.

Eventually it'll be too much to bear. You'll stop making these "jokes" make a new account, and continue to pursue an even unfunnier "gag". Your fellow dramanauts will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the incessant schizoposts. They'll let your account fade into irrelevancy, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know there is an unfunny bandwagon hopper buried there. Your account will decay and go back to dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a (last active 12 years ago) that is unmistakably cringe.

This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.

Snapshots:

https://old.reddit.com/r/Darnthatsinteresting/comments/1icvwxp/woman_performing_as_a_mermaid_bitten_by_a/:

• undelete.pullpush.io

• ghostarchive.org

• archive.org

• archive.ph (click to archive)