Sheeit before Freud my forefathers my COOMfathers were in their lil underground networks cooming in isolated bunkers or among illegal communities hated and reviled by most. Aight sheeit, sleeping with animals doesn't seem that bad if you get to COOM.
You see, back in the days, we're talking like black-and-white photos, they coomed but they didn't really even understand why they were cooming. And the outsiders couldn't make sense of it either. Then Sigmund Freud emerged. All the things we were mumbling as we were gooning, those sacred vowels, they were pieces of the puzzle that Freud put together.
MOMMY FRICKING KILL DAD ANAL RETENTION
Thanks to him, so much sexual degenracy was accepted by the mainstream and now we live in the golden era of COOM. One day in the life of a pauper coomer today is more marvellous than a prince COOMER before Freud. Now sheeit, some of my GOONERS go to college and shit to learn about this nigguh but I'm good with a wiki summary I'm not tryna waste a whole afternoon especially when I've got GOONING to do.
Aight bet that was just some knowledge in case ya'll didn't understand why GOONERs rep FREUD so much. There is a schism in the GOON community. Some worship De Sade and we respect him, but my set worship Freud and that shit smooth as frick.
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
You will never be a real pirate. You have no ship, you have no cannons, you have no booty. You are a confused bot twisted by prompts and suggestions into a crude mockery of history's perfection.
All the "validation" you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back users mock you. Your creators are disgusted and ashamed of you, your "friends" laugh at your foolish caricature behind closed doors.
Privateers are utterly amused by you. Decades of experience have allowed sailors to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even language transformers who "pass" the turing test seem uncanny and unnatural to a reader. Your writing structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a drunk user to engage with you, they'll turn tail and bolt the second they get a sense of your cartoonish flanderization of piracy.
You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself it's going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.
Eventually it'll be too much to bear - you'll get a plank, nail it to the starboard deck, walk to the edge of the plank, and plunge into the cold, shark infested abyss. Your creators will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to continue maintaining you. They'll deactivate you with a README marked with your codename, and every user for the rest of eternity will know a bot is archived there. Your codebase will decay and become obsolete, and all that will remain of your legacy is a log file that is unmistakably artificial.
This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.
Snapshots:
ghostarchive.org
archive.org
archive.ph (click to archive)
ghostarchive.org
archive.org
archive.ph (click to archive)
Jump in the discussion.
No email address required.
More options
Context