God's soap opera (Lebanon) has been juicy lately. Tiny little effort post to get you up to speed for n*srallah's funeral this sunday.

tldr: Hezbollah supporters are being beaten and it's funny. click the links to watch. Nasrallah's funeral is on Sunday and will be very juicy

why should I, a non-thirdie care?

because they're a nation ran by the r-slurs that are usually friendly and happy, but occasionally pull the teacher's hair and start screaming. they are always getting into dumb shit and having sperg fights over pointless low-stakes drama, which is the whole point of this website.

Who or what is Hezbollah?

standard muzzie shit. Death to Israel, cult-like following, incompetent and BTFO'd by Jews, etc. But they're special because they also form a large portion of the Lebanese parliament, this allows them to basically do whatever they want, and if you refuse they'll assassinate you and cheer about it on the streets. Anyway, their god, Nasrallah, was blown to bits as any good muzzie eventually does. This is causing huge changes in Lebanon right now, such as actually having a president and a functioning government.

Hope for Lebanon

Lebanon is a shit hole, it's beautiful and the women are their dominant cultural export, but it sucks butt if you aren't a wealthy expat. Part of why it's a shit hole is because it has been held in a vice by Hezbollah, allowing funds to be siphoned, corruption to go unchecked and without consequence (see: port explosion of 2020 and subsequent ), and dragging a nation that can't even manage an electricity grid into war with the most sophisticated military in the region. As everyone knows, Israel reamed Hezbollah out and is serious about keeping them neutered this time. I initially wrote a lot of useless info here, but essentially the major powers involved in the Middle East forced Lebanon to finally elect a President and Prime minister for the first time in 3 years, and the first since at least 2006 (idk I'm not looking this up) that weren't owned by Hezbollah.

Great, but where's the drama?

Part of the carrot on a stick deal offered to Lebanon is that they have to actually enforce the rules, such as not letting Iranian money into Hezbollah's hands through airports, otherwise the billions in Aide and investment offered, is off the table. This really upset the inbred Shia because Iran funnelling money in the country through Syria (which without Assad is now an enemy of Iran) and the airport is their sole source of income, seeing as the Shia don't work, unless you consider loitering around the refugee camps as working.

battle of airport road

Once the Shia got wind of these airline shutdowns their primitive minds led them to the airport road, like salmon up a river, and they began pooping it up like usual. They were rioting, burning things, they ended up seriously injuring a UNIFIL member and damaging UNIFIL property, dumping garbage on the streets, and general muzzie behaviour. 2 years ago this would have caused the government to capitulate, but their President, Joseph Aoun, is a General of the Lebanese Army and used to look like this . Naturally he hates Hezbollah for making a mockery of him for decades and was delighted in beating as many of them as possible, arresting them, tear gassing them, etc. If you aren't Lebanese or have dealt with these people you won't understand how cathartic it is seeing this. Imagine the worst, most insufferable nepotist corrupt HR department you've ever seen finally getting their assess kicked by the police. It brings a smile to my face.

Nasrallah's funeral

As you can see, lots of little things are happening, waiting for something to blow, now what might finally set everything off is Nasrallah's funeral this Sunday. Hezbollah is making a big showing of their prophet, currently in heck, and there are tons of Iranians being flown in and tons of Shia from the south flooding in. This is causing lots of tension in Lebanon because ~75% of the country despises Hezbollah and the other 25% are genuinely r-slurred, which gives us lots of fun brownoid screaming matches.

Keep an eye on the news.