Women posting their Ls online

Kind of a peepee move if true, but I can still top this foid with my virginity-loss story. When I lost my virginity, the condom broke, so I was terrified that the foid would get pregnant.

I had only met her that night so I didn't know much about her. When I told her what happened, she panicked and wouldn't answer her phone after that (she was a freshman in college and I'm pretty sure she was a virgin too). I realized that I had to get her the morning-after pill. Unfortunately, Planned Parenthood doesn't give the morning-after pill to men, because if they did they'd have guys constantly slipping it to their girlfriends and stuff like that.

So my friend Michelle had to go to a Planned Parenthood and pretend to have had unsafe s*x so she could get the pill and give it to me. Then I managed to get in touch with the roommate of the girl and she promised to calm her down and get her to take the morning-after pill. (The roommate seemed pretty cool and honestly I wish I had hooked up with her at the party, rather than this panicking girl who was completely useless when shit went down). Anyway, I never heard from the girl I hooked up with afterwards so I assume that I'm not a parent.

So basically, the first time I had s*x, I spent the next few days in a state of complete terror thinking that I was going to be a father with some woman I had only just met. Ever since then, I have been completely terrified of unsafe s*x and even during my marriage, I fricked my wife with a condom on (which turned out to be a very smart move, since I discovered later that the b-word was cheating on me).

Of course, when they found out what happened, my friends thought this whole thing was hilarious and bought me a "Condom Tester XXL" t-shirt as a souvenir of losing my virginity. Guys can be buttholes sometimes.