So anyway, here’s a story about a weeks-long drama involving a 7’1” sharkgirl fursona commission for some kid’s internet girlfriend (male) that he wanted to pay for with cryptocurrency that has no cash value and can only be used in the player-created No Man’s Sky meta-economy. It just wrapped up yesterday and I promised @AltAccountOkapi that I’d do a writeup afterwards. Here we are.
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Back on June 2nd, a furry by the name of Rap Daniel The Raptor posted the following offer in the Galactic Hub’s #hubcoin channel:
Hubcoin is a valueless crypto the Galactic Hub has created to be used for the meta-economy and as rewards for events and services provided in the Hub, payment for community involvement, etc. You can use it for all sorts of things. I’m a big fan of Corvus’ Aviary myself, but that’s neither here nor there.
Anyway, he posted that offer, and it was almost immediately removed by the mods, because even in fictional societies in space the fursecution does not stop.
Fortunately, I’ve been friends with 710334 there since the 00s and he owns the place. I told him that I really wanted that Hubcoin and I was going to approach the furry on the dl so please don’t have one of the Treasury Department blacklist me or anything. He approved:
And so I approached the furry to find out what he wanted:
He provided the following:
That is a 7 foot 1 inch shark girl gf. When prompted for more references, he gave me these two deeply romantic images:
Rap Daniel The Rap Raptor provided the following helpful corrections to these images, so that my artist would not make the same mistake:
His girlfriend DOES have a dorsal fin and her tail is NOT spotted.
Easy, okay. So I put out the request on here, offering 20k Marseybux to fulfill his request. This, by the way, creates an official exchange rate of 20:1 Marseybux:Hubcoin.
@AltAccountOkapi accepted and quickly set to work.
His first submission was not up to snuff and Rap Daniel The Rap Raptor thought his 7’1” shark girl gf looked too strong and not quite feminine enough:
So Umbreon got back to work:
And finished later that day. I submit the revised 7’1” sharkgirl to Rap Daniel The Rap Raptor and waited. And waited. And waited. And was met with only silence. So I reported the theft to 710334:
And he told me to file a FRAUD CLAIM with the Galactic Hub Treasury Department. Which I did. You can read the full case documents below, though much of it (minus my cunning annotations) can be found above in this thread:
It went over well:
And 710334 backed me up:
The Treasury, however, had other ideas. Dangerous, independent ones:
I wasn’t going to take this lying down, though, because I’d cleared this illegal art deal on the sly with the leader of the civilization through the power of cronyism. So I had him tell me what to say, so as to avoid implicating him as a criminal or a furry sympathizer. And it worked:
They wanted me to wait a week to give the furry a chance to pay for the shark girl. He did not. And as of yesterday, he has been fined and I have been paid and justice prevailed:
In the end, here are some of the exotic and illegal pets I bought with my newfound wealth:
Look omg it’s an anglerfish biological horror ON LAND and he’s FRIENDLY
THE END
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This was so neurodivergent it crashed the site
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Honestly I was like 8% worried this was somehow true cuz it died SECONDS after I posted lmao
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I thought it was me because I made some new alts lol
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30 year old power janny gets scammed by 17 year old furry coomer lmaooooo
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Hes been bitching about this on the janniecord for like a month now, truly a autism filled tale.
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Posting in a carp thread for dramacoin because I NEED TO BUY A GLORY HOLE FOR JESUS
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They’re only 50k dude you’ve got enough
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19k was previously apportioned to Klenny's Dramacoin Charity for the Needy so I can't spend it on this.
I'm close though, only 2200 to go.
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You can pretend that you donated 2200 to me and then I, being true of heart and everything, donated it back for the Jesus Hole instead of buying bread or crack.
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!blackjack 2200
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!blackjack2200
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Well I can't help u
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How developed is NMS's economy? Is this EVE Online level? Because the fact that you have arbitration and the ability to garnish money is far past what most games do with their an excuse of an economy.
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This is just the Galactic Hub; it’s a (really huge and since-made-canon-by-the-devs) civilization and was also the first ever. The Hub is frighteningly elaborate but they’re all also just absurdly chill pothead weirdos so while they like have a huge xenobiology research division, they’re totally fine with naming things like Farticus Cummicus Maximus, provided the documentation is in order and it’s correctly classified by like genera, family, species and shit.
No real money is allowed to be exchanged for Hubcoin; they’re really anal about that. They want it to be just for fun even though it’s some weird blockchain thing. Which is nice but also really annoying bc I had to do a furry art commission to make enough quickly for what I wanted to buy. And there’s no way of getting it without Hubcoin; they have a complete monopoly on these creatures. Which is GREAT. But still.
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Not at all comparable.
!blackjack500
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Umbreon buddy... you can't draw.
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I was gonna say silence after you trolled him with some ugly butt rtarded lookin cone head.
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i did what?
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Many such cases
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I'm glad I'm not desperate enough for fake internet money to make art for furstrags.
Also, follow me again, you frickin fish.
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(d)C.R.E.A.M.
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Oh I see how it is, saving the good stuff for when the drammy nominations go live
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This is six months old!!!
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I only just saw it now so it's recent to me
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While he was clearly the clearly most dramatic choice and I'm glad you picked him, Umbreon is the shittiest furry """artist""" we have here and I don't blame that guy for trying to avoid paying for that garbage tbh.
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I dated a girl who claimed she was 7’ tall even, but she wasn’t a shark girl, she was just black. I don’t know if she was 7’ tall but she was definitely extremely tall.
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Are you saying the username will go back to Carp at some point?
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I love happy endings
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Based no man's sky hyperautist
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Autism is now with me today, but I upvoted
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For now I will only upvote this post, someone let me know if its worth reading
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It absolutely is not.
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Thanks, I also upvoted your comment
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In fairness he did specify a GOOD drawing.
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Do jannies do it for free? Not on RDRAMA!
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I have no idea what any of this was, but I'm glad I read it, if only for that.
Don't forget to turn off signatures in settings!
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carp why did u change ur username
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why dont u like the new one
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Ehhhh
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Snapshots:
archive.org
archive.ph (click to archive)
ghostarchive.org (click to archive)
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You got the furry artists experience of getting stiffed by your client and you didn't even have to draw anything.
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Gaymers smh. I hate scammers more though.
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give me 10k marseybux or i'm going to whistleblower the rampant CORRUPTION plaguing the honorable hub and BRING EVERYONE DOWN!
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You somehow managed to turn this into a fricking No Mans Sky post god fricking darn you Sean Murray i swear to god if you dont let carp go its over
Oh my god ive been had this entire thing is a no mans sky post the whole time
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Idk
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Stopping reading there, keep yourself safe.
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good thing you didn't see my pyramid scheme
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worth it tbh
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