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1 billion dollars budget and the helmet doesn't fit

@iowa_hawkeye

@Aevann

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I'm sick of prestige TV. Its my second least favorite storytelling format, behind prestige (naughty dog) games. All prestige really means is that everything is drawn out, methodical, and the story has a massive interest in wasting your fricking time with endless shots of nothing happening; a technique used to make sure the lowest common denominator is able to grasp the fricking story beats, by bashing each one into your head for 30 minutes minimum.

The Sopranos, The Wire, Oz, Better Call Saul even fricking Breaking Bad to an extent strike me as amoung the worst offenders. And they are all so fricking dreadfully serious that when something funny happens, the best you can muster is a restrained chuckle. Stupid fricking montages siphoning 20 minute chunks of my life away drive me up a wall. :marseyeyeroll2:

Better Call Saul is the newest pile of 60 hour shit for normies to masturbate too and I really don't think any of these motherlovers will remember more than 20 minutes of post season 2 shit.

Brevity is the soul of wit. If you can't make a fricking simple story in under 2 hours, you're a fricking hack. You're not airing game of thrones, your making a prequel to someone elses original thought and take yourself so seriously that you made a 1 hour black and white hiest montage.:marseybrap:

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yup

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:#hesrightyouknow:

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Another W for MCU:marseyeldritch::marseymoney:
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Alien Reptilian Legacy

I love the skits in this movie. It really helps hammer home the truth.:marseyschizowave:

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The Dark Knight is the only good superhero movie

Discuss

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Reported by:
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No fricking way :marseyspit:

https://www.nme.com/news/film/chris-pratt-says-he-doesnt-like-being-called-chris-its-not-my-name-3258100

I think I'll go with "CP"

:#marseypedo:

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Don't Blink

Free on Tubi. Originally thought it was typical schlock horror. More of a drama or mystery I suppose.

Good premise and decent acting, Zach Ward does a great job with his character. It's got a nice comedy vibe to it at times as well. Can tell it's lower budget but doesn't suffer the typical shit pitfalls of a low budget film. Last 20 minutes is pretty slow and while it makes sense for the movie it does drag until the end.

Some people may dislike the ending, I think that is the main gripe on IMDB. Personally didn't mind it.

I don't recommend watching the trailer.

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h/movies posting guidelines :marseyjanny:

Hi Cinemacels. It's now been over a day since the creation of this hole, and I haven't really done anything besides pinning my starshit rants and upmarseying all your great posts.

Since I'm technically the owner of this hole I figured I should probably set some guidlines:

Rules:

  • No spam. Don't make repeated no-effort posts, especially if they're about capeshit. Shitposting is ok if it's not incessant

...

  • No low-effort bait Shitty baitposts will be removed unless they're funny and create drama. Trying to generate seethe in the comments is fine though.

...

  • Excess wingcuckery Really this should be implied by “No spam”, but in case you're severely neurodivergent I'll spell it out for you: REPEATED POLITICOID POSTING IS SPAM.

...

  • RDrama rules self-explanatory

Feel free to break these if you think I won't care. Unless you're making the hole unusable or i'm personally annoyed by your posts, I probably won't.

Other than that, feel free to post whatever, stay on topic most of the time but idk that much. Enjoy posting and enjoy the hole!

:marseythumbsup:

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Prehistoric Planet is the best documentary I have watched recently

It's on apple +. And since it's an original, they threw a frickload of money into a very well crafted show. The result is gorgeous

I was very confused after watching the new jurashit park because it made no sense whatsoever. I just watched it because I liked the original Jurassic park movie and I could spend a fun few hours with my niece.

Prehistoric planet more than made up for all the headache caused by Jurassic Park.

It's narrated by David Attenborough and music by Hans zimmer.

It's genuinely mind-blowing. So freakin awesome.

Absolute stunning and gorgeous CGI resulting in almost photorealistic dinos. The visuals are crazy good.

The only drawback of the show is because they are introducing dinos from fossils, they have limited info, mostly about their feeding, brooding and mating habits. So it's just eat, frick, have babies.

Which is hilarious since like 50% of the show time is devoted to dino neighbors fighting amongst themselves to show who is the chaddest male so that they can mate with females.

I literally can't stop thinking "what kitty does to a motherlover" while watching this show

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This is the weirdest shit I have ever watched.

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website is sketchy so make sure you have an adblocker.

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I'm sure most of you are aware of or have seen at least one version of Blade Runner. Some of you might not be aware that there are at least five different versions of the film that range from minimal to dramatic differences in tone and pacing, for instance, the theatrical release contains a voiceover dub from the perspective of replicant hunter Deckard, while many of the subsequent cuts do not.

Since the film's initial release, there has always been an argument among fans as to whether or not Deckard is himself a replicant, provided memories (much like the character of Rachael), and sent to hunt his kind. There were always minor ambiguities that could reasonably lead a person to consider this as a possibility, though in the initial theatrical cut, as well as most of the other releases over the years, it's only ever vague conjecture.

About a decade ago, Ridley Scott released the "Final Cut" of the film, which incorporated stock footage from an entirely different film of a unicorn, and the way this footage is cut implies that Deckard dreams of this unicorn regularly. Later, the character Gaff, another detective and minor antagonist of Deckard, places an origami unicorn in Deckard's apartment. The implication clearly being that Gaff somehow has knowledge of Deckard's dreams, which could only be the case if he were briefed on the memories that make up Deckard's "programming". When asked about the possibility of whether Deckard is a replicant, Scott enthusiastically agreed, stating that this was ALWAYS his intention, much to the confused headshaking of every other member of the cast and writing team.

Honestly, if you consider Deckard as a replicant for even a moment, the entire philosophical POINT of the film is ruined. We NEED Deckard to be human because his lack of emotion and "humanity" at the beginning of the film is exactly what he is taught to appreciate by the "andy" Roy who saves him in the end of the film. Essentially, Roy becomes "a real life boy" by choosing to save Deckard, truly becoming "more human than human" (it's not just a company slogan; IT'S THE POINT OF THE FILM). If we don't have that interesting component of empathy and grief and loss that Roy, an android struggles with and eventually achieves, and if we also don't have the re-awakening of Deckard's own humanity, his renewed appreciation for life and its impermanence, we don't have a fricking movie.

God I (sometimes) hate Ridley Scott.

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#DeathToWingCucks

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Following the Mongol withdrawal from Russia, German knights of the Teutonic Order invade the Republic of Novgorod. Prince Alexander Nevsky (Nikolai Cherkasov, who looks like a man on Xannax) must rally his people to resist the formidable force after the Teutonic soldiers threatened the Russian city. Alexander stages his last stand at Peipus, where a major battle is fought on the ice of frozen Lake Chudskoe. While Alexander leads his outnumbered troops, two of their number, Vasili (Nikolai Okhlopkov) and Gavrilo (Andrei Abrikosov), begin a contest of bravery to win the hand of a local maiden.

The film is hugely influential and it's battle scenes have been the catalyst for movie-makers such as Stanley Kubrick (Paths of Glory, Spartacus), Mel Gibson (Braveheart) and Peter Jackson (Lord of the Rings).

It was banned shortly after it's completion as the Molotov/Ribbentrop non-agression pact between the USSR and Third Reich came into effect, but was resurected as a wartime propaganda piece in 1941.

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The dance party right after putting the ussr flag on the Reichstag was pretty kino ngl. Also the Nazis are actual German prisoners of war

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The story of a kiwi special forces commando team sent on a mission to a nazi occupied channel isle where there's some occult shenanigans going on.

It's an indy film with a small set and a small cast, but it those are really the only bad things I can say about the movie. The acting is surprisingly good and the atmosphere throughout the film is very tense.

Give this one a shot, it's a real hidden gem.

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THE SANDLOT (incel) Pool Scene (1993)

baller

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Bonus content:

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Is Shaun of The Dead the best zombie movie?
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Repo! The Genetic Opera

I've got Paul Sorvino on the mind (Watched Goodfellas last night. Pretty good) so I'm going to shill one of my all time favorite movies: Repo! The Genetic Opera. Think Saw meets Rocky Horror. Falls firmly into "so bad it's good" or maybe it's just camp and I'm neurodivergent.

It's hard to recommend because every aspect of it is bad. The effects, the writing, the singing, the audio mixing. Everything is awful. But once you get past the "holy shit this is r-slurred" it morphs into "holy shit this is awesome"

All star cast. All star musicians. Paris Hilton is in it. Paul Sorvino obviously. The girl frow Spy Kids. Seriously cannot recommend it enough.

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