Peloton: we thought we would let @lizzo announce our next Artist Series

https://x.com/onepeloton/status/1547597329917571072
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2022 or 1912 corporate america: ha ha american consumers, look! its the comically obese BIPOCette doing comical things like exercise despite being so clearly unsuited to it! buy our amusing product


https://i.rdrama.net/images/17035381209726467.webp

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I mean it makes sense. Fat women are a larger demographic than fat men, fit women, or fit men. Get an actual morbidly obese woman with YAAAS QUEEEN energy to market your dumb frick product to people who literally just need to eat less for 6-12 months first.

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yaaas queen feel the burn (of your massive thighs and side pit flesh rubbing together and chafing raw)


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Dude I’m eating

:marseysick:

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show me your deeply pocked recesses, flesh pinked by lack of air and over exposure to built up sweat and blocked pores


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Luckily I ate and did the dishes before reading this one.

:marseybye:

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https://i.rdrama.net/images/17035381209726467.webp

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Its over for me

:marseycry:

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It never even began for food-cels

:#marseyautismchonker:

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To be fair, if Lizzo actually pulls a Rebel Wilson and gets in shape that would be amazing advertising for Peloton.

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Or shit advertising because this is meant to appeal to lard asses will never be fit. They have plenty of people already appealing to the fit demographic.

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the best consoomers are the ones who buy gym memberships and never show up but keep paying for it every month because they are totally gonna

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Thats actually calculated into how many memberships the max capacity per location is interestingly. Like they assume x% will literally never use their membership.

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literal whales

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are those bikes rated for that weight

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10s of googling says peloton weight limit is 305 lbs (sturdy af tbh) and lizzo maxed out at 310 but appears to have lost weight (cant you tell in the video?)


https://i.rdrama.net/images/17035381209726467.webp

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Anyone with a bmi over 25 should not be able to wear that

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Yes and Im forever fricking pissed at the board of Lululemon for kicking out Chip, he refused to make clothes for obese women and the board wasn’t happy because that’s a huge demographic for more $$$

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RURUREMON

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His interviews about the name are hilarious

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Who

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![](/images/16578573715388768.webp)

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Are the eyes edited?

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No :marseysad:

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No they're not. It was a case for animal abuse

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Actually she is the perfect model for this. The people who spend thousands of dollars on a peleton are not out riding bikes and I doubt they are even riding their expensive exercise machine.

A membership to a pool, a cheap bicycle or running shoes would be a far better investment than this expensive piece of junk.

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Idk I know people who have them and use them. If you’re a fairly wealthy, busy person, living in Texas, the long butt drive to a gym may not be worth the time. Also it hits 100+ degrees up to 100 days a year, so running and biking are pretty fricked. Yesterday it was 90 at 10pm or so.

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I bike in that sort of heat a lot but I get it even if you are hydrated it can really be rough, I just dont see the value in a machine like this when you can buy a real bicycle and hook it up to an inexpensive trainer or roller and get the same performance (minus the touchscreen). You can even watch spin classes on youtube and ride at the same time.

I've just never felt longterm motivation doing that sort of thing. Biking is more than just exercising its an excuse to get out and explore your city or neighborhood or woods near you that makes riding a bike so much fun.

What would be truly hilarious and noteworthy would be a MTB or BMX company sponsoring lizzo

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This is what I wanted to say too

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Only 30 seconds she will ever spend on a Peloton bike.

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You can tell its at minimum resistance and she’s still huffing

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She’s also reading the copy off the peloton, why didn’t they put it near the camera so she could maintain proper eye contact. Amateur hour shit if you ask me.

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What's wrong with her boobs?


https://i.rdrama.net/images/17187151446911044.webp https://i.rdrama.net/images/17093267613293715.webp https://i.rdrama.net/images/17177781034384797.webp

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They eould have been small on a healthy weight.

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Everything

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There are no quotes. Deal with it.

Snapshots:

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:marseybased:

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>German cycling class

What's German cycling? Did we come up with another disturbing fetish?

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It's good advertising, shows off the sturdy construction

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Chonker!

:marseysoylentgrin:

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They know their market for sure

Fatties who like the idea of exercising

:marseypartyzoom::marseypartyzoom::marseypartyzoom:

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She's gunna die mid class

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