They turned James :marseymetokur: Bond into a flaming libtard :marseysoycrytremble: wtf :mjlol:

One soy milk please, shaken not stirred :marseycheers:

Taken from "On His Majesty's Secret :marseyglow: Service"

138
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That's just bad writing. Could have dumped an agenda in much more elegantly, especially without slashes.

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The slashes represent all the budget cuts and austerity he introduced, you're simply to dumb to understand the symbolism :marseysmughips:

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Set this guy up slowly over time. Don't just infodump on the reader

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Halp info bomb

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Especially since it doesnt tell you shit if you dont already know what it means. A bit like a cult...

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Subtlety :marseybrick: died when the iphone :marseyappicon: was born.

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I heard :marseyjacksparrow: the author :marseygeorgerrmartin: got called up on short :marseyprincesszeldatotk: notice, apparently he had only a few months because it was supposed to release with the coronation of the new King.

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It doesn't matter if he was rushed, because there's still no need or excuse for such blatant infodumping or clunky wording.

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who is the audience for this lmao

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"Modern audiences"

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JARVIS, read eighteen audiobooks to me at the same time, all at 2.37x speed: I believe I should enjoy a good read.

You can't tell the book is bad if you don't pay attention.

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Made by females for females. Never forget, all this cancer is ultimately due to females.

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Probably made for females, but the person responsible for this abortion is a filthy self-loathing moid.

https://i.rdrama.net/images/17089215203834136.webp

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Should have made it a period piece and have it set in the 80s

007 you are running out of time. Lunch ends in 20 minutes and the driver has had only a single glass of port. Do ensure that he's well above the legal limit before the paparazzi arrives

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:marseyxd: A lecturer of mine at uni unironically believed MI6 took her out because they "couldn't tolerate her marrying a Muslim".

That was 1997. It only seems that long ago.

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There's just something funny about the image of the queen phoning a hitman who makes a limo driver booze cruise

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How is it that the seat of what was once the greatest empire in the world has become a society of the most pathetic limpwrists.

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The bong empire was won by a tiny fraction of the country :marseyredcoat:

There were like a hundred EIC employees in London bankrolling a thousand employee in India who led like 30 thousand local soldiers to topple the Mughal empire's remnants

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Because for some reason they decided to willingly give up their empire.

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>willingly

lmao

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:#marseyeggirl:

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:#marseywomenrentfree:

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:marseyhesright: every single :marseywall: wildstar comment :marseysoypointdubz:

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"They were the grown-ups of the party" is only ever said by someone who judges maturity by appearance, as well as rolls with it despite any evidence to the contrary. Foid hands wrote this :marseydetective:

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Women don't read James Bond books

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I don't think there's a single person alive who has ever read a James Bond book. I'm baffled every time a new one comes out.


https://i.rdrama.net/images/1728611539221579.webp

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The originals sure, but... new ones? Anyone who could be interested in bond books would also know that there's nothing authentic about the new ones

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Everybody who read a Fleming Bond book is dead


https://i.rdrama.net/images/1728611539221579.webp

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Most modern entertainment IP that gets updated for "modern" audiences doesnt actually appeal to women. Or anyone really, which is why the reboots tend to go down in flames quickly, and the horde moves on to the next IP to burn down.

Its funny that theyre also the ones saying rightoids should just make their own "X" if they dont like the new direction, since theyre the ones infiltrating and co-opting existing, non-woke IPs. And what original content they produce gets hailed by their co-ideologues but curiously never seemtms to have much success in the real world with a normal audience.

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>Anti BBC

:#chudbbc:

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I posted that as a reply to you by accident, I was gonna serious post about the target audience (manchildren), but then decided to shitpost but I was still replying to you :marseyitsover:

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The second part is worse. Bond is confused that there's no diversity at the meeting. This villain thinks he can do whatever he wants!

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https://i.rdrama.net/images/16745643295683622.webp

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I find the inclusion of disability in that list especially hilarious. Why aren't their henchmen on mobility scooters?

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Kino if done right ngl, imagine Bond having to escape from henchmen on jet-powered mobility scooters

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>Explaining the absurd quantity, raw ineptitude, and sheer ridiculous show of arms from Bond villain mooks as mass diversity hiring backed by limitless ESGbuxx

:#marseynoooticer:

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>James Bond is strapped to a table

>The mastermind shows up

>"How DARE you!"

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https://i.rdrama.net/images/1708945755246048.webp

:#marseykino:

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The next Bond villain is Shane Gillis leading an army of downies

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Klaus Schwab really is an IRL Bond villain

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If I hadn't seen the context I would have thought this is just an average Twitter lib post :marseyscared:

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He notices the guy hasn't made half his team diverse

Surely it's supposed to be satire

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Yeah I remember seeing this months ago.

I wonder if they're actually going to make bond movies with that black girl as the lead

This is what she said about her character

>Lynch hoped that her character would bring a new layer of relatability to the world of espionage, saying "When you're dealing with a franchise that has been slick for so many years, I wanted to throw a human spin on it—to deal with anxiety and be someone who's figuring it out, completely on her toes"

Aka "I want James Bond to be r-slurred and foid-brained"

Lol. :marseygunshotsuicide:

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Im so tired of this shit. Not even making him a "yaass Kween slay", but the whole "relatability means making the protagonist an insecure wimp". Not only is that not any more relatable than a suave womanizer, it is also an even worse role model to tach children. What are they taking away from it, that its fine to be a nervous wreck and they shouldnt work on it? Thats how you end up with fricked up generations like zoomer and alphatards.

And it also teaches people that theres no need to be professional in a professional setting. Which really pisses me of in real life. Get your fricking shit together, thats what youre paid for. Alternatively get another job :marseyrage:

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Not only is that not any more relatable than a suave womanizer, it is also an even worse role model to tach children.

In all of the original novels it's pretty clear that Bond isn't a role model.

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They didn't even keep her as 007 by the end of the film, they're not making her Bond going forward

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>anti-bbc

lol

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:#marseyblacked:

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:#marseyblackedgenocide:

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So they acknowledge cultural-Marxism is something they believe in? :#marseyshapiro:

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That's what makes me think

:mars#eyoctopus4:

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I LISTED THE BOOK IN THE DESCRIPTION YOU NEVER :marseyitsover: LISTEN :marseyhearnoevil: TO MEEEE :tayaaa:

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:#boxdog:

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And it's a GOOD thing!

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a goodreads review says that he keeps bringing up January 6 in it too :#marseyxd:

Can we just get back to what Bond readers actually want? How about a return to traditional Bond action and adventure and dropping the woke references? You can only mention the capitol riots so many times (along with some other soft ideologies).

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Actual garbage. Is it being shilled by critics?

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It came out about a year ago and I'm only hearing about it now, so probably not. Apparently it's about the queen dying and her replacement and they rushed it so it could be released around the time of the coronation.

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TFW I'm a bri'ish secret agent and so obviously the most important thing to :marseyrentfree: is some inconsequential yankee nonsense

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Poorly written tripe. Honestly Bond should be going after Muslim terrorists and other real-world threats. Also if you wanted to deconstruct Bond don't make the mistake Alan moore did and turn him into a straight-up villain. All of Bond's symptoms, such as his coldness, violence, hyper-promiscuity, misogyny, alcoholism, permanent adolescence shown by his love of Disney films and obsession with cars, guns, and gadgets, bouts of depression, discomfort around children, violent mood swings, madonna/whore complex, and desperate need to appear suave and cultured, point to him having been sexually abused as a child. Probably by a close female relative or caretaker. It's not hatred of women that drives Bond; it's hatred of a woman. He's mostly functional in his line of work but I don't think he can function very well in day to day life. Most of his love affairs seem to collapse after they move in together. Bond doesn't seem to have any close friends outside of work. He's a troubled, sad man who only feels alive when he'a staring death in the face.

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literally :marseyme: me :marseyme:

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I'm so sorry you were molested

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no I was the femolester :aroused:

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will you molest me?

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>he doesn't remember :meow:

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:#marseyhands:

molested and I can't even jerk off to the memory. Why even live? :#marseysuicide:

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How big is his peepee? Is it girthy? Cut or uncut? Big loads? Shooter or dribbler?

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Bond has a MASSIVE hog. Suuuper girthy, shoots biblical loads.

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:marseyleftoidsch#izo:

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Look at the font typeset. Its FAKE

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Regardless of wingcuckery, its just such a terrible two paragraphs. Just nothing but a list of "this is why you should hate this."

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Anyone writing new James Bond stories should be shot out of a cannon. Adapt the books into movies all you want but Fleming was THE one and only Bond book writer I will recognize …

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Pic related, it's the villain

:#marseyme:

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Is this the british equivalent of the woke latinx CIA ad

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This feels like a total shitpost

You may be be a conspiracy theorist, a neonazi, work for the destruction of the world and fight for TND, and the Tories don't care

But touch their precious :#marseytrain:s and it's over for you

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Bait too obvious, especially the part about coup not having any women or cripples in it

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That's what you get for watching modernized Downey and Cucumbert Sherlock.

But it was good and not woke like this

:marseysoycrytypingtalking:

No.

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Wtf is the text justified in a novel??

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Have you never opened a physical book before or what

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:taygrimacing: you're right

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No, that's for nerds.

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@BWC he's anti-BBC :#marseysoypoint:

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