Republican cites Bible to defend hitting disabled students : nottheonion

The biggest problem with corporal punishment in schools is that teachers are even stupider than the students. I don't trust those !r-slurs to accurately grade a six-year-old's arithmetic quiz, never mind punish the right kids in the right ways for the right reasons. They'd probably just use it to abuse whatever students cleared the subterranean bar of "smarter than a public school teacher" as a way to feel better about themselves.

Which is why I propose corporal punishment for teachers be implemented first, with parents being the ones beating them. Once a certain number of parents determine that a given teacher has been sufficiently beaten and thereby completed their training, the teacher in question will be allowed to begin beating their students. And if the teacher never improves, the parents get to beat them to death. It's a perfect system where everybody wins.