OP has quite a post history: she's a 31 year old virgin who was considering IVF to be a "single mother by choice" but must've changed her mind and started posting in childfree

We talk about catcalling, getting hit on at random places, men who can't take no for an answer, unsolicited pictures, etc but we never talk about what it's like to be completely desexualized. Has anyone else dealt with not being seen in a sexual way at all?

Nearing my 60th year on this planet and I am loving no longer being seen in a sexual way. Probably because I developed young and am healthily endowed

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People don't treat ugly men like they aren't worth getting to know as people just because they are ugly. Women who are not conventionally attractive are treated like they aren't worth even acknowledging as a fellow human being.

sorry you'll never understand how hard it is to be a woman

What I'm not a fan of is ANYONE acting like catcalling is compliment. It's harassment, end of story.

Has anyone else dealt with not being seen in a sexual way at all?

Why is this an issue?

Yes. The very moment I come out as trans to men...

I feel like black cis women have a lot in common with trans women in the way we are treated.

TW: sexual assault I'm glad you are bringing the subject OP because I thought I was the only person with this concern. I feel shameful for typing this but I have never been r*ped and I've heard so many women have been, so it made me feel like I was not attractive enough.

There's this movie welcome to the dollhouse. In one scene, the main character's brother suggests she's not pretty enough to get kidnapped (though her little sister is). These characters are young, 13 and 8. If someone is not preying on you, wanting to r$pe or f$ck you, sorry, you must not be beautiful. If you grow up female in the west, this is essentially what you are taught. The patriarchy we are living in is a real mindfrick.

I've been young thin and pretty and fatter and youngish and then skinny again and older and now fat again and middle aged. The being fat and middle aged thing has been the only time I've felt completely desexualized. Like I'm invisible to men now. It's honestly kind of a shitty feeling. I went on a girls trip with my best friend last fall and she's my same age but extremely petite and cute. She was flirting with bar tenders and other people. And I was like hellllo I am here too. I felt absolutely invisible

This is definitely a subject that needs to be discussed / examined more because it's as much a tool of the patriarchy as hyper sexualization

Pretty privilege is a massive blind spot in this sub. So many women and girls clearly don't understand that life isn't just about individual interactions, it's about how being part of a demographic has a broader systemic impact.

uh oh who let this misogynist into 2x

Unfair expectations leading to desexualization aren't purely a male perpetrated thing. For men, we have similar standards imposed on us. Except instead of youth and thinness it's money and height.

Can't have one goddarn thread without some dude chiming in about “bUt MeN tOo WiTh HeIgHt!!!!”

No. It isn't remotely the same thing.

Yes! I'm fat, so I deal with it a lot. I have complicated feelings around things like catcalling. It's just a weird place to be. I agree and understand that catcalling and shit like that is awful. But it's just also.... A very weird feeling to feel, left out of it I guess?

I don't think I'm even that ugly and no one's ever cat called me lol. I definitely feel left out and like something's wrong with me when women act like it's a universal experience.

Personally I think there is a weird flex where some women claim that they can't walk to the mailbox without being hounded for s*x by multiple men, or that every single man they encounter sexualizes them. It's either Main Character Syndrome or they a way of asserting dominance

a reasonable comment on 2X?? Someone better get the to mop it up!