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Girl asks to open relationship, boyfriend of 7 years turns her into the side chick

https://old.reddit.com/r/polyamory/comments/15xrpt2/i_am_so_jealous_of_my_boyfriends_girlfriend

								

								

I am so jealous of my boyfriend's girlfriend.

My partner and I of seven years decided to be in an open relationship about a year ago. He stated he didn't want poly but really just s*x and fun connections and what not. Well he met someone and now he spends half his time with her. They go away for days at a time, I am forced to Google schedule time together otherwise he fills up his time with her, I don't feel like a priority. He says I am and I expressed that they are spending too much time together but it has seemed to fall on deaf ears. He had told me time and again if it came down to it he would chose me. While I didn't give him an ultimatum he told me a couple days ago that he won't break up with her and that if I cannot handle this new change in the relationship then essentially it will end. I am absolutely gutted. I feel like this is the beginning of the end. He said if at any point we need to shut it down we could but now he has changed his mind. He spends time with her family and goes away on little trips and runs when she calls crying and I feel like this is going to tear me apart. He is a good man but all I think now is that he is choosing someone else. If I don't put up with this then it's over. He knows I am upset and I can't help it. I feel like my anxiety and sadness over this will push him into her arms and home will not be a place he wants to be anymore. I feel like he bait and switched me and now I'm sharing the love of my life 50/50 without a choice. Less than that because our of the 50 percent he is at home, his work and friends and other life stuff needs to be addressed. It was my idea to open the relationship and I feel like I am losing him and I feel like I will lose him.

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I'm surprised at how many comments there are siding with the guy, and not being removed to boot.

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Poly foids are weird and prioritize defending the sanctity of ENM over foids that want to keep their husband's peepee to themselves.

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Because she sounds like she is committing the one sin they can't abide: jealousy. She should be delighted he's finding all this love and romance with his new chick, not being clingy and expecting him to put her first.

The amount of back-pattting poly people do about not experiencing jealousy and this is what makes them superior to monogamy is incredible. So of course they're all on his side, not hers, because if they were on her side, they'd be admitting poly isn't the greatest thing ever and people do get hurt.

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It's the poly sub. They live in their delusion that if you adhere to rules that everything will work out. So if it doesn't work out you must have broken the rules.

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