Warning: TMI and oversharing.
Men scare me. Their lust terrifies me. I'm seriously not sure if I can ever see my self trusting a man or deeming him worthy enough of my virginity or body. At the same time, I know I have a crazy high libido. It's a conundrum. So for the first time in my life, I used a dildo. Prior, to this I've never inserted anything up there, (apart from tampons). It was VERY uncomfortable at first but after that fine. No blood though. It felt so great being in control and not having to emotionally depend on a man. It also gave me lots of confidence and reassurance that I am capable.
I know deep down this doesn't count as losing my virginity. I so wish it did and might convince myself it does. It upsets me that I still have that to give that “first” to a real man.
Anyone else experienced anything similar or have any advice to get over this hurdle?
Edit: Thanks for the support everyone! Seeing a lot of comments saying that “virginity is a construct” and that I need to let this whole idea go. Trust me, I know and I am REALLY want to. However, for context, I grew up in an ultra Christian household that drilled purity culture into me since I was 5 years old. So unfortunately, it's a very complicated and distressing narrative to unpack. It doesn't help I have been disappointed by men my entire dating life so emotionally I think I would break if the experience was bad and I was regretful.
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My brap alarm was going off
Losing weight and losing friends
I've never heard of this. Is this just true for super fat people? Like how alcoholics will stop hanging out with people who get their lives together because they can no longer point at them and say, "Well, at least I'm not as bad as that guy."
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This might have something to do with this. Social media is a disease. Is this former fatty taking offense to people not sending her enough emojis on her IG? Are her friends just not wanting to interact with some c*nt who's gotten a big head lately? Maybe every single one of them is a person who can't comprehend empathy?
I've had friend's who've lost weight or just gotten in shape in general. The friends in our group call them a skinny strag but are supportive for the most part. I'm also not friends with people who have social media. We're all boomers at heart.
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Idk lol I don't associate with fats
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You should call your mom
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It could be skinny women upset that their designated fat friend isn't able to do the job anymore.
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!biofoids Can you help us with this question about fats?
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I wouldn't know, because I'd never bear to look at a Fat long enough to form a friendship in the first place
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tldr: sounds fake and homosexual.
really heavy friends wind up being not being much fun in the long term because there's nothing you can do together other than watch TV, smoke or eat at a restaurant (if they even fit into those tables). every single other activity is "too far to walk!!"
otoh when former chonks slim down, you can finally do fun shit together. I imagine this is the same for men too.
the one exception to this is probably if all your other friends are also massive chonks and don't want to change.
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WHITE EXTINCTION IS LONG OVERDUE
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Fatties are pieces of shit likes addicts so it makes since that addicts and recovering addicts stop talking
Putting the
in
spookieturkeymerrynew yearJump in the discussion.
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