I recently directed a movie

I don't know if you guys remember the screenplay that I posted on /r/drama years ago, but I finally turned it into an actual film. I funded and directed it myself.

We're in the process of editing it right now and it should be totally completed at some point in November (or December at the very, very latest).

This entire process has been an emotional roller coaster and the stress has really started to get to me. Making this movie and, by extension, being a filmmaker is the only thing I've ever really wanted in life. I wrote this script (well, an earlier version of it) like 8 years ago when I was still in high school and I've sat on it that entire time while occasionally going back to it and making revisions. I didn't have the time, resources, and maturity needed to actually bring it to fruition until this year. I worked a soulless corporate job at a company run by sociopaths for almost five years so that I could save up money to finally accomplish this. This thing cost me $50,000. I didn't do a kickstarter or take out a loan or borrow from friends or family, this entirely came out of my own savings. I had never directed anything before and I knew that if I told anyone that I planned to spend that much making it, they would have told me it was a stupid idea....but this was a gamble I had to make. I had to take a risk on myself because if I didn't, I would just be one of the countless people that gave up on their dreams and I knew I would regret it for the rest of my life.

I think, overall, everything came out well. There were no major disasters in the production process, my actors all did a great job, and I think it will even be good from a visual standpoint instead of looking like a cheap indie movie (my cinematographer/camera man shot it on an Arri Alexa which is the same type of camera that major film studios use). But I have this constant sense of dread that everyone will hate it and that I'll never get to do this again. I don't even care about the money, I mentally wrote off the cost of the project, but I'm petrified that this project that I poured my heart and soul into and spent years of my life planning will be liked by no one and that people will think I'm a joke for making it.

When it's completed, I'll post a link here so you all can watch it. This movie will either be the start of my career or the end of it but at least I'll be able to go to sleep at night knowing that I tried.