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  • J : H/glory
  • naive : if its good enough for stores its good enough for rdrama general

Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition

It's so hilarious to me the whole idea of it. Frick it let's just do porn for this issue.

Not even related to sports at all. And they have these on the magazine racks at stores like come on you gonna put the porn out like that for everyone to see. :marseycoomer2:

https://i.rdrama.net/images/17268483836761723.webp

This is THE COVER of the magazine for the SWIMSUIT EDITION.

SHE ISN'T EVEN WEARING A SWIMSUIT. Kate Upton just has her tiddies out and is covering with her hand. What even is this? :marseyxd:

Boner Killer Alert


2024 is weak though they are all wearing dresses and not even sexy

https://i.rdrama.net/images/1726848383860515.webp

Or this one:

https://i.rdrama.net/images/1726848384088059.webp


Best

Rookie Kate Upton was the best imo. She is the queen of SI swimsuit edition:

https://i.rdrama.net/images/17268483843329592.webp https://i.rdrama.net/images/17268483845949194.webp https://i.rdrama.net/images/17268483848035061.webp

Peep the second image with the clams covering her tataas. Mmmmm.

46
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https://i.rdrama.net/images/17268488560984375.webp

clams covering her tataas

:marsey#whirlyhat:

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idek sea star whatever i wasn't even paying attention to them i was looking at the milkers

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She's holding the starfish's teeth right over her nipples, which is closer than your mouth will ever get.

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do you think i care that i can't frick a hot woman i saw in a magazine?

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Yes

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https://i.rdrama.net/images/17268551719058557.webp

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they eat from their butthole btw :mariogoatse:

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https://media.tenor.com/UeD1tc9RXIwAAAAx/cartman-shit.webp

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>which is closer than your mouth :marseyhissing: will ever get.

Oh I know :marseyseethe:

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Those starfish are breastmilk maxxing.

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https://i.rdrama.net/images/17268496764272714.webp

smoker's cough if smoker's cough was an SI swimsuit model

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:bog#ged:

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i like trashy hos reminds me of my hometown

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remember when she made all those :marseypedo:tweets and then had ro delete hwr twitter when peoppe called her out butt she claimed hareassment and rhe media just glossd over it?

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2014. Right before everything really started going to shit :marseydepressed:

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that and the Citizens United decision are why everything seems fake/corporate controlled these days

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seems

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https://media.tenor.com/X79x90jJzkwAAAAx/cat-lazer.webp

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But the propaganda is all anti-American???

:marseyaware: :marseyaware: :marseyaware:

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Anti-legacy America. The people and values that made America what it is are now considered undesirable by the powers that be. They still want the money and land though.

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:#marseyspit:

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Learning about the SI swimsuit edition was a godsend for preteen me. I feel so bad that young boys now have to look at fats, uggos, and oldies.

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My dad brought a 1995 edition back with him when he went to the US in 97 and my first wank was thanks to this magazine specifically this page

https://i.rdrama.net/images/17268614962652519.webp

:#marseycoomer2: 11 year old me loved them titties

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The good days. Now I can't even get an erection if the girl doesn't look like she's about to throw up.

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Now they're going straight to beating off to like triple-anal gapes or some girl drinking c*m out of a doggy bowl while a guy (who is fricking her in the butt) steps on her head the first time they ever pop a boner, instead of being able to last a year on a SI swimsuit edition and a lingerie ad the way God intended.

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When I was like 6, our neighbourhood had a big garage sale. Like 10 houses on the street had a garage sale. One house, the guy had a box full of Sports Illustrated that he was giving away. My friend's brother, being the smart kid that he was (he was borderline r-slurred 7 year old), just took the whole box. There was probably 30 magazines in there but a couple were the swim suit issue. Five of us boys just sat in a circle oggling these broadsd lol. Good times.

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Aww, let the boomers have their pseudoporn.

Black trans lives matter and should feature in the SI Swimsuit edition

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Latinx fitness models with BBLs on instagram have been my new sports illustrated swimsuit edition for years.

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Instagram really ruined the SI swim suit

Why buy a magazine when some code cel programmed hotties in my feed

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POV: You are a hot girl looking through your follows list

:#marseyboomer: :#marseygrilling2: :#boomermonster: :#boomerjam: :#boomerportrait: :#marseydoubtit: :#marseygrilling: :#boomer: :#marseycoomer2: :#coomerface: :#coomer: :#nooticer: :#marseywheelchaircoomer: :#marseyembarassingpurchase: :#marseycoomerface: :#marseycool2: :#marseydatass: :#marseyalienboomer: :#capyboomer: :#marseygigachad: :#marseyretardchad: :#chad: :#capychad3: :#gigachadqueen: :#chadjew: :#gigachad: :#chadblack: :#marseychadfoid:

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I think its more like

:brazilmutt: :kovid: :yakub: :coomerface: :chadindianheadset: :texasmutt: :chadblack2: :marseytunaktunak: :chadblack: :coomer: :littlestchuddymacaco: :mutttantrum:

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G*mergate caused this. :marseyvivianjames:

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I remember people always made fun of kate upton for having a boxy body

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she does, but still a bad b-word

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https://i.rdrama.net/images/17268878255226302.webp

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According to Google, wet means "covered or saturated with water or another liquid." Since water molecules touch each other naturally as they move, and because there are always (99.999999%) more than a few molecules, they naturally shift and cover each other as they move.

In other words, water is wet. Checkmate mf

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kate upton used to be offensively hot jesus christ

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If your goal is fatass acceptance, why not actually make fat chicks LOOK HOT??? Let's compare the top example of 2017 lady holding her breasts to mrs 2024:

2017:

  • Naked body ordained in jewelry that accentuates her form while clearly indicating she's kitty-out naked. Underboob. Neutral, inviting expression.

  • Inviting, contrasting colors in thumbnail view. The sun-kissed woman's skin contrasts against a the blue waters of a beach.

  • If you paint bucket tool silhouette her, you can clearly see her sensual form and pose even in only two colors.

2024:

  • Unappealing brown swimsuit, confused facial expression (?), globohomo insta-slop makeup.

  • No clear focal point that your eyes are drawn to.

Like come on, the chubby lovers can clearly produce appealing images, and if your amerimutt agenda is to brainwash people into thinking fat women are hot, wouldn't it make sense to ACTUALLY MAKE THEM HOT too?

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Those kate upton leaks THOOOOO

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in middle school i was busting like 5-10 nutes a day over that shit

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>middle school

:marseydeadinside2:

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I started masturbating in 4th grade buddy before I could even c*m. I would literally orgasm without shooting loads, it didn't even feel good. I only started masturbating because my neighbor friend (same age) was asking me what it was because we were watching southpark. Then when I got back to my house I looked up what masturbating was and tried to figure out how to do it. I literally eas tugging on my shit for like 2 hours until I figured it out. Idek why I was so focused I was just like how tf do I do this shit.

I was also super racist back then with my friends and glorify the KKK calling black people in our class BIPOCs. It was mostly my friends, even one time I remember my friend like deadass questioned me if I was really racist because he thought i was faking it and wanted to make sure i was really racist and not a poser.

I also got in trouble like weird type of trouble like police were chatting with me because I was "sexually harrassing" a girl in the 5th grade. Like they prevented me from going to the bathroom at the same time as the other kids, I had to walk 10 feet behind the other kids. I am not even lyying about that part. Shit I still think about that. I missed like 40 days that year because frick that.

Neighbor that shit really pissed me off, because our whole class was dirty asl saying shit. But I got picked out even though we had kids saying shit about getting their peepees sucked or sleeping with girls. Made me feel ashamed for literally nothing, like I wasn't even sexually harassing her like both the girls I was talking too were both laughing and one of them even said "we aren't gonna tell on you because you are so funny". I think even my teacher felt bad because she realized I got ostracized for nothing and the funny thing is the girl who told on me apologized later the next year. I am not even mad at her I am made the principle who legit had it out to get me he was like an ex cop and even like shaked me one time LOL because I called him a cute twink or something. I would literally tear into that neighbor frick him. I called the new school he worked at and told them he touched kids lol frick that neighbor man.

I am dead serious, its weird looking back. I also got in trouble for saying the principle teebags kids to my friend as a joke. The goody two shoes mid in my class is who I told the joke too and he was howlingbwith laughter. By like 3rd grade we already got him to start saying frick and b-word and shit even BIPOC. He was cool though, big into football.

This was all in elementary school. I probably remember elementary school better than I remember anything else. I got in trouble so much but was on A game for socials.

I could tell a million difgerent stories about elementaey school. Probably won't believe me, but this is like serious. I cam't tell anyone in real life because they look at me weird.

i needed to get that shit out. I got in trouble so much in elementary school. I went to the principle like 10-20 times a year usually over bullshit. I never even got (out of schoo) suspended except i bullied a kid or they said i did, but i wasn't ringleader it was another dude frick you frick you frick you, making me writing an essay for bullying cute twink c*nt i am gonna send more fake shit to that principle he is such a cute twink.

like honestly, dead butt if I ever see that guy again I am gonna stomp on his head. he was such a low self esteem loser. he called me into his office and gave my iss because he thought he heard me insuly him even thought i didn't insult him that time. after he gave me iss i did though. i also wrote on the tables shit about him i can't remember exactly what i put.

weirdest thing is we got s*x ed in 5th grade? like the principle was their and gathered all the 5th graders and we had s*x ed. like nihga wait bro. and he was so serious about it, i kid you not one guy giggled and the principle screamed at him and kicked him out the room and gave him iss. fricking white BIPOC. the vp was an uncle tom coon who was kinda more chill but still a cute twink fricking frick that guy ia m gonna knock him out and shit down his throat.

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if any of people from my old class i see this shit, highly doubt it, but

dill pickle was a c*nt and i am glad that cute twink died. his brother also r*ped his younger sister hahaha you fricking b-word (him not his sister. i feel bad for his sister she was a brat but that was fricked up)

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That degree finally paying off

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Tfw you'll never beat your meat to your dad's maxims before he gets home from work again

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