I am unhealthily obsessed with luigi mangione

This is my first parasocial relationship, i've never even had a celebrity crush before. I now find myself thinking of him everyday, wondering what he's pondering on in his cell, what he's feeling. I get anxiety from thinking that he might get indicted and actually spend his life in jail, or worse, get the death penalty. I would honestly get depressed if that were to happen.

I just don't understand why I have such this huge attachment to him, I mean he is attractive but not a complete head turner. I think it's his whole appeal, everyone describes him as such a kind and sweet boy and yet he's capable of murder? Knowing he risked going to jail or losing his life and still did so for a cause greater than himself. The epitome of courage. He's also so smart, I've read some of his essays and the topics he likes to research on are peak intellectual sexiness. Also the whole deny defend depose thing.

These past weeks I've been having debilitating episodes of maladaptive daydreaming where we escape to Costa Rica and live there on the beach, happy and together. These daydreams include multiple scenarios for example, one day I arrive home from the market to a police squad and my sweet Luigi handcuffed, I then proceed to shoot everyone and we escape again. This is not normal and I really want to let this go, I just can't.

I do touch grass btw, I go to yoga and the gym daily, i'm in school and I work.

I read a twitter article about it possibly being a psyop that I will link here, honestly does not seem too farfetched. I mean, fangirling aside this whole thing just seems bizzare. Why would he get caught with a weapon he could've easily gotten rid of. And the manifesto? Seems like a high school kid wrote it. If it's a psyop I feel even more bad for him and I'm seriously scared for our society if the gov has this much control over us and how we react slash what we think.

This whole thing has me feeling helpless, what's the point of creating my own paradise on earth through discipline and achieving goals if I'll just be living in this rigged and disgusting world and on top of that my dream man is in jail and being accused of murder.