So peep this. I wake up one day with a smile on my face. I ready to GOON hard and hustle COOMpacks to my homies off the street. Gay, straight, all genders and nationalities, I don't discriminate when it comes to selling legal and illegal COOM to those in need.

I was try to watch a LIVE CAMGIRL SQUIRTING HARD PULSATING CLITORIS and the stream went off! Shit sucks yo, but I was EDGING like mofo and I held in my COOM. I tried to browse pornhub and all my favourite videos were GONE! I researched and found out that FEDs are trying to shut this shit down.

Nah fam PornHub don't die that's Town Square for gooners. We use VPNs round here AND we got our shit downloaded fam.

I dug deeper into this shit and I discovered that the Latter Day Gooner Cult is behind some of this shit. They claim to be about that GOON life but it's clear they're trying to restrict GOONING talmbout "holy GOON sacraments". Nah I GOON when I want. Which set you rep?

Sheeit, I was reading up and it turns out this schism in the GOONING community has been going on for eons. All throughout the years, there has been tension between the younger GOONERS who are trying to GOON fast and hard, and the older gooners striving for a subtler, but longer-lasting goon experience. Me? I stay with them young bucks. I goon too wild to be shackled by coom calendars and shit. I believe my set GOONs the hardest.

So yeah, the gang war has begun and we goon on cultists all day every day on site. A lot of GOONERS are gonna CATCH CASES, SSDs CONFISCATED, and INTERNET ACCESS RESTRICTED by FEDs while on probation.