Long story short, I met a guy from grindr 10 years older than me. He was the daddy type.
He said he needed the money because he was short on rent. Which wasn't a lot. I was hesitant because I hadn't done it before, but I thought he was also kinda into the fun, but with extra money.
When I came to his place, he looked like he was really struggling. I asked him if he was okay, and he said yes. I gave him a bj and paid him. He really looked like he regretted doing it, being paid for s*x because he had no other choice.
I told him it was just a friendly gift instead, and he didn't have to treat it like a transaction.
I am so guilty. How am I different from a grapist or a mol*ster? I had s*x with someone not from their own will. I didn't enjoy it. I didn't enjoy it at all. I feel disgusted.
I texted him if he wanted to just pay me back in the future and treat it separate from our s*x transaction. But he blocked me already.
EDIT: when i said struggling, i meant struggling financially
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