Snappybeep/boop
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I remember the first time I saw blood in pornography and I was like "oh this is cool… can we get some more? Can we get all of it? Can everyone be covered in blood… ok I need to stop watching that porn and maybe even stop watching at all for a bit" luckily I only indulged for a bit, and as my family was extremely conservative the stimulus was rarely available. I was also maybe 14, so it was much easier to find other things that attracted me and not have that be an instant trigger. I have no idea how my brain decided to stop and be like "no this a REALLY bad idea" but I am often haunted by what I could have become. And I will NEVER watch adult sexual content with blood in it again, I imagine it might be like a stiff drink after 10 years sober and it still freaks me out.
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I remember the first time I saw blood in pornography and I was like "oh this is cool… can we get some more? Can we get all of it? Can everyone be covered in blood… ok I need to stop watching that porn and maybe even stop watching at all for a bit" luckily I only indulged for a bit, and as my family was extremely conservative the stimulus was rarely available. I was also maybe 14, so it was much easier to find other things that attracted me and not have that be an instant trigger. I have no idea how my brain decided to stop and be like "no this a REALLY bad idea" but I am often haunted by what I could have become. And I will NEVER watch adult sexual content with blood in it again, I imagine it might be like a stiff drink after 10 years sober and it still freaks me out.
Snapshots:
https://vintologi.com/threads/the-authoritiarian-manifesto.1385:
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archive.org
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