I do not expect people to forget that I am trans

oh don't worry sweaty how could we ever forget when it's the only thing you talk about

Imagine placing this amount of your self worth in how other people see you.

One lady who swore up and down that she saw me as a woman, expected me to pay the bill every time we went out to eat,

I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY LMAO

https://old.reddit.com/r/MtF/comments/uo73p3/woman_said_she_could_tell_i_was_trans_because_of/?depth=9&sort=controversial

This post is

I cannot stress this enough: be careful to what cis people tell you. They will lead you astray. A lot of cis people take a sadistic pleasure in invalidating your identity and telling you they can tell you are trans. They will rub salt in your wounds, act friendly and supportive, while pretending they knew all along even when they didn't. I know some cis people take the opposite approach with obvious hons pretending they didn't know. However, if you pass reasonably well and are somewhat attractive, there is no greater pleasure to them than enumerating imaginary flaws. This topic is particularly useful for younger transitioners who are naïve and eager to please.

Case #1 (very recent): I have been taking some boxing classes recently as part of a project to empower women and teach them self-defense. This woman in her thirties has literally seen me twice, always with boxing gloves on. She asked for my phone number and I clearly remember giving her the digits while still wearing my boxing gloves (after the class) and her entering my number in her Android. We made plans to hang out outside of the gym (I am exclusively attracted to men), and I came out to her via text message. To make a long story short, she completely changed, she became distant and cold, and said she knew all along I was trans because of my hands. Again: She has never ever ever seen me without boxing gloves. She says she feels uncomfortable having a man in a class designed for women.

Case #2: I dated a guy twice. He was smitten. On the third date, I told him I was trans before things got more serious, and he said he knew all along because of my Adam's Apple. I have zero Adam's Apple. Not even the slightest hint of Adam's Apple. Not even at my thinnest and with the head tilted back you can see any Adam's Apple. So, why would he date me twice if he knew all along and then ghost me when I come out?

Case #3: This happened over 11 years ago when I was younger and thinner. I was in Seattle and it was snowing. I went to a Starbucks coffee and I was in line waiting for my turn. A guy in his late 20s gets up from his table, walks towards the door to exit, but lingers on a few seconds and stares at me. He makes me uncomfortable. He then smiles and says I am beautiful. We chit-chat briefly and he asks for my phone number. I tell him my phone number, he enters it into his phone, and he leaves. I get my Latte and he texts me saying I am beautiful and asking me if I like Sushi because he wants to take me out. I tell him I am trans and he says, "yeah, I can tell. It's obvious. Your hands... your hands are very manly." What the frick! I had worn my snow mittens the entire time and only took them out to get my Latte and to pay and this was several minutes after he had left. So, there was not a chance he saw my fricking hands. So, I ask him if he is cool with that and he says, "no, I only like real women." I probe him, "why did you compliment me? Why did you want my phone number if you knew all along? Why did you want to take me to eat sushi?" He replied he was just being nice.

The trains entire history is worth a read, hilarious

Their very first sentence

I am a trans woman. I know who I am, what I am, and what I am not. I do not harbor any delusion.

Immediately followed by

I think of myself as a variant of being a woman

You can't make this shit up, it's too good

I have witnessed innumerable types of microaggresions

Everyone who unironically uses the term "microaggressions" (and can't even spell it properly) needs to be sterilized. Fortunately, the cute and valid seem to actually agree to that.

I had to become a b-word as a survival mechanism.

I don't even have anything witty to say about this. Just

Now, my bar is set very high and I cut people off at the first sign of gender invalidation

He's doing everyone around him a huge favor, so probs for that

One lady who swore up and down that she saw me as a woman, expected me to pay the bill every time we went out to eat, to carry heavy stuff

Lol, it's funny how they try their absolute hardest to enforce the gender stereotypes they so vehemently swear to fight against

Or some people would expect me to work for free because I am trans (they would call me asking favors that would mean hours and hours and hours of free work).

Literally what?

I do not expect people to forget that I am trans, but for Christ's sake, treat me as a person and not as a character

Well maybe if you develop any kind of personality beyond being cute and valid that's gonna happen

One lady who swore up and down that she saw me as a woman, expected me to ... carry heavy stuff.

"Hey! You! The woman with the big hands and broad shoulders and massive armspan! Help me carry this 65" TV!

Oohhhh the transphobia!

microaggresions

It feels like It's been years since I've seen that word. I figured it had fallen out of favour with these types as they upped the rhetoric to 'any sort of disagreement is now hate speech'.

I had to become a b-word as a survival mechanism

Huh. Guess you really are a foid

When I had FFS, the surgeon's assistant quoted me one price, then she raised the fee by 8k once I was there the day before surgery. She made up a bunch of excuses blaming miscommunications. I found out later they do that on purpose since you can't withdraw as you have already booked your flight, hotel, taken time off from work. I got very upset and she told me I had had a typical male reaction. Go figure. This was an office whose practice was made of at least 96% of trans women

lmfaooo based butcher surgeons grifting their patients

The reason people who transition are disproportionately neurodivergent is they take people who say "trans women are women" at face value. They think it means they can become 100% pure woman, not that it's tantamount to "Sure, I'll humor you by saying it, even though you'll always be a trans-woman as opposed to woman."

Well I'm only 20 and after highschool I either fell out or lost contact with my friends, and after that all my friends have coincidentally been LGBTQIA+ so I haven't had to cut anyone else out besides some transphobic family members so I'd count myself pretty lucky!

alienate your friends and family by blowing everything out of proportion and being generally insufferable

"coincidentally" surround yourself with superficially supportive internet friends

???

profit

Yes this is true unfortunately. Among all the grand benevolent validating gestures from supposed allies, it's the seemingly small behaviours that give away their real perceptions they have of you.

kek s seething because they can't change people's minds. they want to control what everyone thinks of them but they will never be able to, everyone including their hecking allies will always see them as the freaks they are

Im betelguese winonia ryder was depressed and suicidal because her stepmom was a b-word. This allowed her to see ghosts for some stupid reason. This reasoning is far more solid than anyone trying to explain why neurodivergence matters.

Time to turn up the toxic positivity to 11 otherwise my entire life is in jeopardy

I consulted a plastic surgeon in Beverly Hills over some facial fillers. This happened in 2018. I got a bit emotional during the consultation and teared up while recounting what I had been through. The surgeon instantly became patronizing an when he was walking me out of the door, he told me, in front of other patients and in front of his stuff, "You are more feminine than real women." He made sure everyone in the waiting room heard it. Can you believe it?

TRANSMISIC ACTORS BTFO

Omg so true as I’m reading this, a very close friend who says she only sees me as myself a woman just say I need help with bills, or every time we go out or clubbing always gets my card, lol actually she just hold onto for the night. I’m like why don’t you get one of your cis GF card instead of mine every time.

I don't even know what this means.

you can't expect me not to take advantage of double coin with a low effort trainpost

I have witnessed innumerable types of microaggresions, almost imperceptible types of disrespect that all add up cumulatively.

Maybe you just want to see it.

It's extremely sad we still live in a society where people have not rewired their brains to make sure they don't perceive humans by their basic senses and patterns. What your eyes, ears or nose tell you is irrelevant, what other people say should be the only thing affecting your perception.

Snappy?

Snapshots:

• undelete.pullpush.io

• archive.org

• archive.ph (click to archive)

• ghostarchive.org (click to archive)

They always think it’s solely because they’re trans. Back when I was still active-GOP I started a friendship and then “like-liked” with a woman in Colombia (she looks exactly like 1990’s Sean young); she had remarked that despite the “issues” she was so thankful that she waited until later in life because she was able to be a parent and wait until after divorcing and his daughter was older. Total opposite of “I left my7 children to age-play as a little girl).

She had published in Nature. Never gets hostile or aggressive, and was doing this in Colombia (infinite hard-mode). I’m not woke and prob 95% straggot but I was both sexually and emotionally attracted (not the stereotype).

What do think is going to happen when they cocoon with redditors. they would never tell you if you’re fricking up and that’s if the the thread isn’t ‘yalled.

its funny because if you're truly a woman you shouldn't care about what other people say you are, since you clearly know what "being a woman" feels like

I think internal agony posts are my favourite