For the purposes of this thread English/British are interchangeable. Welsh, Scottish, Irish, Cornish and people from Yorkshire are excluded. They are all good people with culture, humility and manners. The English are not.
I'm on holiday in the Mediterranean at the moment in a very classy hotel. Been here for almost two weeks and it's been lovely.
Until the last two days. The English have a big four-day bank holiday coming up preceded by school holidays, so as my holiday has gone on unfortunately the amount of English "people" around the place has been increasing.
Frick me I can't articulate how much I despise these culture-free ogres. The men are all overfed Shreks with skinny little legs and massive arms and chests puffed out. The women are all fat slags with trout lips and tramp tattoos.
I've gone from enjoying quiet evening drinks on a patio bar with Germans, Spaniards and Italians to having screaming British brats kicking footballs around and British Shreks all jeering and clapping in unison whenever someone drops a glass or plate. A teenage boy was leaning over his balcony shining a high-powered green laser at people across the courtyard. A child emptied a giant bag of Cheetos (not Cheetos but for Burgers to understand) into the infinity pool as her fat slag of a British mum waddled slowly after her croaking in a disgusting Essex accent "FOR FRICK'S SAKE SHARL!"
Like, how the frick do these cretins afford to come to a posh hotel and yet be so crass and feral? How can a nationality be so ugly and unrefined while being smug and arrogant at the same time?
Please share why you too hate the British.
And any Bongs reading this, why are you like this?
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I don't get why Brits say Americans can't handle their booze.
Brits get fricking stupid when they drink, purposely trying to get kicked out, grabbing the bar staff, shouting c*nt, puking in the bar etc.
Their food fricking sucks, bacon comes from the belly, that's it. Nowhere else does bacon cheese come from. Also the pudding shit y you eat is fricking gross, tomatoes and mushrooms for breakfast is just wrong.
Their foids are dumb as shit and ugly.
Why do they always want to fight, my regular bar knows to kick the Brits that are pissing me off before I clean their clock. You're 7000 stone and a flight of stairs puts you on your butt, you have no buisness fighting anyone, especially me.
With that being said, I have some really good bong friends, but they know how to act proper and apologize whenever they see one of their countrymen acting up.
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