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i'm american and even i know this is all incredibly gay

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You have stars on your flag, so you should know "gay". :marseycanadian:

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since when are stars gay

https://media.giphy.com/media/oO8KOiMffqxD2b5Xzr/giphy.webp

are you saying patton is gay? :punch:

https://i.rdrama.net/images/16924080272314928.webp

OR AUDIE MURPHY? THE MOST BADASS DUDE WHO EVER LIVED!??! :badass:

wait don't answer that if you don't know who he is because...look at him. :uhuh:

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Patton was gayer than J. Edgar Hoover, don't kid yourself....

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j edgar hoover? more like GAY edGAY hoover!

BAZINGA :xd:

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Dang, ur good.

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Dang, ur good

i no bby now let me see that bussy

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yeah i am. i really should do stand up.

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The man on the bottom is a twink lol.

:marseywould:

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he was so short and twink-like they almost didn't even let him join the army. he was like 5'5" and 120 pounds and had to literally beg to be allowed to JOIN A WORLD WAR WHERE PEOPLE WERE GETTING FORCIBLY PUT IN THE ARMY.

but then finally got in and proved to be a rambo-level badass in war. the most "you can't put that stuff in a movie, it would be too unbelievable!" stuff.

and then they did put it in a movie. about him. and he played himself because there wasn't an actor alive able to pull off his badassery.

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The masculine desire to stand in a burning tank destroyer and spray .50 rounds into an advancing German horde until the barrel glows red

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Based Audie Murphy. My great grandpa smoked krauts with him in Salerno.

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WHAT REALLY?!

i wanna say lucky cause audie fricking murphy but also yanno...war.

the first world war 2 book i ever read was audie murphys bio. it's what kicked off my UNHEALTHY OBSESSION with world war 2.

well that and getting more stoned than everyone has ever been, falling asleep during saving private ryan, and having a world war 2 dream. which then led me to the audie murphy book.

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Well I doubt they ever met, idk what division he was even in. The extent of my knowledge was that he was definitely in Salerno and Northern Italy, and did something to get a bronze star. He brought back an officer's PPK and a rifle, which was cool. He was also very short, which is a funny coincidence. They probably would've gotten along well.

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