It looks like he's stabbing a child lmao.

Also /r/games, which normally has reddit-tier opinions, is chudding out over the game.

https://old.reddit.com/r/Games/comments/1fohexw/ubisoft_cancels_press_previews_of_assassins_creed/

just tried playing baulders gate 3 for the first time and man literally any tutorial would have been helpful. what's an action? whats a bonus action? how often do u get to use them? it feels like a game built for people with a lot of preexisting knowledge

— Aella (@Aella_Girl) September 24, 2024

May Nu-Respawn and the R*pex Legends developers never touch this franchise again

With the recent announcement of Ubislop dropping their presentation on Butt Creed Swarthy Edition in Japan, I took a trip to a subreddit of people without standards to check how they were handling it. As these people not only play, but actively look forward to Ubishit games, they are accustomed to advanced coping methods:

https://old.reddit.com/r/assassinscreed/comments/1fohi0l/ubisoft_has_reportedly_now_backed_out_of/

https://old.reddit.com/r/assassinscreed/comments/1fo8ydg/ubisoft_has_cancelled_their_plans_for_tgs/

Apparently the new Starshit game isn't performing well and there is talk of a corporate takeover (if anyone has info on this, I'll pin your comment). These items among others are being blamed for the seeming delay of the next game, and discussion of a certain Black samurai is banned, so that couldn't possibly have anything to do with it.

Some of my favorite comments:

Well with the doodoo butt release of Star Wars Outlaws and their stock going down it'd be in their best interest to actually make this game good lmao they need a W cause they've been taking Ls up the butt

I didn't get the game at release, so I imagine things have changed in the first two weeks, but I'd really like to know why people think Outlaws is a bad game

Story's good, gameplay's fun, visuals are absolutely gorgeous... I just can't understand where all that negativity comes from

Admitting to this may be more embarrassing than admitting to being an Butt Creed fan

anyone who has played Outlaws knows its actually a darn good game. the world is stunning. its like living in Star Wars

I saw one gameplay video showing the protagonist doing a takedown on a stormtrooper by punching him in his armored helmet and knocking him out...with her bare hands.

Yeah the world is pretty but the gameplay just looks dumb, like they shoehorned in mechanics without actually making them fit in the world

Guessing you've never seen a single piece of Star Wars media if her punching helmets with her fists is a problem 😂 lemme guess, you're gonna move the goalpost and all of a sudden, it made sense in the movies, clone wars, etc.

Thanks for the reminder that Star Wars is just a shit franchise in general.

If it needs a delay then fair enough

Just means I'll have more time for Dragon Age I guess lol

It's like all these people want to do is play terrible games…

Oh great… awesome news. This game is literally what I'm most excited for this year, specially with college massacring me. And now apparently they're gonna fricking delay it. Incredible. Does wonders for my will power. First Mirage is delayed for months, now this. I'm gonna lose my mind.

Ahhhh I have to wait an extra month to play my boring, buggy game that's a palette swap of the last one I had to wait for! I'm literally going insane!

A delay of a few months would be ok, but I swear if it's "indefinitely delayed" or outright canceled, I'm going after all the fricking grifters that pushed them to do this!

You cannot tell me all the negativity hasn't impacted Shadows at all!

This guy gets so angry about his vidya possibly being canceled that he starts threatening to fedpost. Everyone point and laugh!

That's uh... strange.

Unless reception is harsher in Japan that reported on?

Could it perhaps be that actual Japanese people are upset with the game and it's not just western chuds like we've been told..?

I'm sure people won't blow this out of proportion, what am I saying, this is the AC fanbase, we've not been happy since 2010

Imagine willingly playing though and discussing games for a franchise you haven't actually enjoyed in 14 years…

The most unbearable "anti woke" YouTuber you know is going to make so many videos on this

The worst part about this shitty game being delayed is that the chuds will take it as a victory!!!

They were going to showcase 3 games. XDefiant, AC and Star Wars. It was supposed to be an online presentation. It has an absolutely nothing to do with controversies and most likely technical difficulties. Even if the problems were directly related to AC (they aren't) they wouldn't not show show games already released because of them…

most likely technical difficulties

They could have got some threats form people. Ik reddit likes to pretend that Japan doesn't care about shadows but a good loud minority does.

threats

My assumption is that they don't want more backlash from the locals lol

Thats only if you believe that there is huge uproar over the game in Japan, which there isnt.

Denial isn't just a river in Egypt.

This is just scratching the surface of the cope iceberg. If the game gets delayed, or even outright cancelled, this sub may implode on itself!

4chuds celebrate: https://boards.4chan.org/v/thread/689836091

Circlecope: https://old.reddit.com/r/Gamingcirclejerk/comments/1fodmn3/the_wokes_have_lost_ubisoft_finally_recognizes/

Previous thread I made some hours ago lol: https://rdrama.net/post/302855/ubisoyft-japan-has-cancelled-its-tokyo

!g*mers WON

!chuds WON

!asians WON

UBISHIT LOST

FROGS LOST

DEI-NCELS LOST

TOTAL G*MERCHVD VICTORY

《拡散希望》
日本ヘイト企業、犯罪企業で有名なUbisoftの「アサシンクリードシャドウズ」フィギュア

長崎原爆で破壊された
「片足鳥居」をモチーフにしたと思われる破壊された鳥居をフィギュアで発売。

僕は「片足の鳥居」をアメリカによる長崎原爆で破壊されたもの以外知らない。 pic.twitter.com/JIM63P8H6O

— shin (@r230614_shin) September 23, 2024

>Please spread the word

>Assassin's Creed Shadows figures from Ubisoft, a famous Japanese hate and criminal company

>A figurine of a destroyed torii gate has been released, which is believed to be based on the "One-Leg Torii" gate that was destroyed in the Nagasaki atomic bombing.

>I have never seen a "One-Legged Torii" other than the one destroyed by the American atomic bomb in Nagasaki.

!g*mers

Lol press L2 to grip the rod, you blushing little queer

!g*mers please sign

!g*mers

https://old.reddit.com/r/gaming/comments/1fn63as/dragon_age_the_veilguard_the_qun_didnt_prepare_us/

There are TWO foot fetish routes, comprising 40% of the endings. Another ends with S*X SLAVERY. LESBIANS NOT HAPPY

I'm personally not a fan of the dialogue and humor but the cute butches are screeching rn

there is this really really funny scene where the main character kisses another girl (for bait purposes) and them immediately talks about guys she likes as the other girl (who is an actual lesbian) looks visibly downcast ahahahahahaha get FRICKED Muff Divers

We're finally ready to risk leaving the city and heading out into the countryside. But first, why would we even want to?

There's lots of things that we just can't get here in Duisburg. Remember how in part 2 I mentioned that knowledge of saints and alchemical formulas is going to be critical later in the game. We can't learn them all here. The shops here don't carry every product we might need. If we want an exotic weapon like a composite bow we'll have to search for a place that sells them. Also most items in the game have a quality rating and different cities are better at making different kinds of items. The best swords can be found in Nurnburg, the best hammers in Prag, and so on. Alchemy requires a lot of traveling to find the various components needed for making potions. If you want training, not all cities have a physician or alchemist who is actually skilled enough to teach you. And of course at some point we'll start doing quests which will send us all over the Empire.

Let's see if we can pick up a little knowledge here before we leave.

Saints

Remember that urban monastery where the nuns healed our wounds? That's not all they do. They have a library where one of our party can learn about a saint. There are many, many saints in the game, I think over 100, but this library gives us the choice of 4 of them. This is one of the things in Darklands that got a young Redactor to go into the real world library and read about these people so I could remember who they are and which ones to pick in the game. Let's see how my hagiography holds up:

• Edward the Confessor - This one is easy. He was a famous King of England.

• St. Jude - We just read about him earlier because coincidentally this happens to be one of the saints that Yuna started the game already knowing.

• St. Albert - I blanked on this one. Tried to look him up but there's a million St. Alberts. Many of the saints in this game are really obscure ones who were important to medieval Christians but forgotten today, not ones who are currently hip and trendy. I think the one referred to here is a king in early medieval England.

• St. Maurice - I used to know about this guy but forgot and had to look him up too. He was an Egyptian general in the Roman army. Long story short, he refused to kill civilians so he was martyred.

TW: If you're religious you might find what I'm about to say a little bit flippant and offensive because we're going to be comparing these saints based on what they can do for us in a video game. I totally get that, but I would argue that keeping them in mind even when doing frivolous things like playing games is a good thing. It never got in the way of me appreciating these peoples' lives and martyrdom. In fact it got me to learn who they were. In a later episode I'll go more in depth about how Christianity is depicted in the game, but for now just trust me that this is not atheist edgelords trying to take down God, either me or the people who made the game.

Having gotten that out of the way, let's ask ourselves, what can these saints do for us? Let's remember who we've already got. Redactor has St. Anthony, who does a lot of great things but is especially good for academics and dealing with people. Yuna has St. Jude, who can bail us out of desperate situations but isn't particularly focused on anything. So with that in mind, let's evaluate our choices.

• Edward - He was a king, so I'm guessing in the game he will help us deal with nobility or something. And IIRC he was a scholar who spent a lot of time studying. That overlaps a lot with what St. Anthony already can do for us.

• Jude - Even though Yuna already knows him, it's actually worth considering having Redactor learn him too. Having two people who can pray to the patron of lost causes would be useful.

• Albert - I have no idea who this is so that rules him out.

• Maurice - He was a soldier, so it's likely that he can temporarily boost our weapon skills. At this point, early in the game, that could give us a crucial edge in a tough fight.

Well that's not exactly what I was expecting. Sometimes saints end up being patrons of all kinds of places, jobs, etc. that are not immediately obvious. I gotta read more about this guy to figure out what he could possibly have to do with alchemy. Unfortunately, note the "Success: 0". He's one of the saints who doesn't just listen to every whiner. Yuna will need to earn the right to talk to him by living a virtuous life. In order to keep things simple for my loyal readers I haven't asked any saints to intercede for me yet, but in a later episode I will explain how that works.

What does this have to do with travel? Remember how the nuns healed us that one time but they're not going to just do it over and over again? Many things in Darklands are like this. It's intended to avoid the "water finds a crack" problem. You can't just always stay in the same place and do the same thing. The librarians here won't let you back in again for a long time, maybe 6 months. But there are other libraries out there.

Alchemy

Let's see if Redactor will be more successful. He knows three formulas for potions. We aren't going to actually make any of them any time soon because we first need to collect the necessary components which involves a lot of traveling and a lot of paying money, two things we haven't done yet. But maybe he can learn a formula now that will be useful later.

Notice that we only managed to find this guy because Redactor knows enough about alchemy. Let's try to trade formulas with him. If we're very lucky he'll accept and we'll get a new formula for free. But it's very unlikely. Redactor only knows those 3 formulas and with 13 charisma he is not, as Richard Nixon would say, a "personality boy". Alchemists aren't trying to be helpful like monks and nuns, they're neurodivergent neckbeards who need their ego to be stroked. Normally we would have Sasha handle a task like this as she has amazing charisma and knows how to speak well, but in this case it's got to be Redactor who does the talking. This is a really low-percentage shot like when I try to talk to girls but hey, it never hurts to try, does it? At least that's what I tell myself when I'm sexually harassing women on the internet.

It actually worked! He just gave us a formula for Stonetar. This is sticky goo, extremely useful stuff. You can use it in battle to slow down your enemies and it helps in all kinds of weird unexpected situations. Someday we will definitely be making this.

Why don't we just do this constantly in the hopes that we'll get lucky again and get another formula? It's like with the library. You can't pester these guys every day. If you want to discover new things you've got to go to new places.

Travel

Okay, I've been jerking you around long enough. It's time to get to what I promised you. We're going to leave town and go out into the wilderness of Germany in 1400, ravaged by plague and warfare, where you're stalked by everything from wolves to satanists to demons straight out of heck.

Note how you're given 6 different options just for leaving the city. These would be relevant if the cops were out looking for us, but we're clean so we can just walk through.

Wow, thanks buttholes for not even removing the fricking copy protection from the game before you sold it to me. I'm used to playing a cracked version where you can just click on anything and it lets you pass. But this time it booted me back to DOS. I guess next time I'll look it up in the fricking manual again just like in living in fricking 1992 again. Last time I saved was before I got that Stonetar formula so that's lost. Anyway, let's try this again.

Okay, here we are out in the open world where we hear that iconic music.

Anton's original marseys still remain among the best.

Let's walk around for a second. Oh wait, we just ran into a random encounter. Dealing with these is half of the game. If you've played King of Dragon Pass or Six Ages you'll get how this works. If you haven't, you're in for a learning experience. We're going to be constantly running into enemies, problems, opportunities, all kinds of stuff as we walk around the Empire.

These are just some old geezers who want an escort to Duisberg. Why not? TBQH there's not actually any purpose for us to be out here other than for me to show you what the world map looks like.

Through this act of Christian charity, Yuna's Virtue has increased. Maybe some of those saints will pay more attention to her.

Where should we go? Let's check out that village to the east.

Okay that's pretty dire. That last sentence "There is nothing you can do here." I have always found really haunting. So yeah, there's some pretty dark stuff going on out here. We'll find out later how that village got destroyed.

Let's follow that road up north. I know Duisberg is somewhere in the lower Rhine area, I think Westphalia. Oh look, it turns out there's another city very close by.

It's Wesel, a city I don't know that well. Just that it's pretty far down the river. I think we're almost getting into the Netherlands. I guess I'll just walk right in. Wait a second. A toll? B-word, please. I haven't paid a dime for music since Napster got started and I'm sure as heck not paying any toll to walk into your little shithole town. Let's have Sasha try to use her charm and get these guards to simp for her.

Frickin' moids, man. Works every time.

Next episode: Actually I'm not sure what to do. So far I've planned these out really well to gradually introduce important gameplay mechanics, but at this point we're in an awkward stage. There's big parts of the game that we can't get into yet just because we can't afford it. Maybe I'll grind for a little while and then we'll be in a position to take on our first quests. And if anything goes wrong I can just savescum and never tell you about it.

Apparently you can play the ps4 version on ps5 and double dip all the achievements

And I liked it the first time so much that I did

There's one in set 2 that's bugged and no one has so that's the 95/96

Anyway that was exhausting and I think I'm done with vidya for a few years

!vampires

Hi guys here is a tutorial how to pick lock in Splinter Cell

just got banned for a week for calling someone a cute twink in my vidya.

why even play multiplayer these days?