Could part of it be that the women going to your house are in it for a hookup/FWB/casual whereas the date women are looking for more and not quite seeing a match IRL?
I wouldn’t think so, I state upfront that I’m looking for something serious and am not into hookups at all. [-24]
I wouldn’t recommend asking a woman to hang out at your place. That’s not safe for either of you. Also, not everyone is looking for a free meal. I understand the concern if you’ve dealt with that a lot, but it’s important to be optimistic as well. I know it’s hard sometimes, but a negative mindset isn’t going to help
Personally, I think it’s best to either get coffee/a drink, or even ice cream, or go for a walk – obviously at a place that usually has a fair amount of people around and while there’s still daylight. You could even do some thing like walk around a farmers market if you have those in your area. That doesn’t require you to spend any money, you could just talk and browse. And if the woman isn’t okay with some thing but that isn’t dinner or something less casual, then she’s the wrong woman
I’m for going right over to the woman’s house in theory but I’ve read several stories of men being robbed/killed.
We’re also in a post-MeToo world — I won’t even be in the same room alone with a female colleague at work. Doesn’t make sense to not apply the same level of caution to my personal life.
How I dearly miss the days when I’d sneak into a girl’s parents house and bang her out with the parents sleeping in the next room. Actually had several situations like that when I was young and carefree. [-26]
Meh. No one cares about paying. It's not like these women are pretending to like you just so they can get a free meal. They aren't fricking hobos. They just didn't like you. Get over it and move on to the next woman.
At least for heterosexual men, paying for meals is part of dating. If you don't like it, don't ask them out to a meal on your first date.
I do actually know girls that all they want out of dating apps is free meals and drinks. [-3]
You don’t like someone when talking on the phone, have an engaging date, and then suddenly not like them. You know if you are attracted to someone or not before you meet them. You know if you get along and have enough in common from conversations before the date. They just are bored and want someone to take them out, and why not if it’s free. [-50]
I seriously thought you were my date from the other night writing about our dinner. I'll tell you why I wasnt interested in seeing him again even though we had spoken on the phone and I knew (for the most part) what he looked like: he treated the waitress poorly, didn't ask many questions, talked about himself too much, talked about his frequent use of Psychedelics (I'm sober), and delved further into HIS hobbies. Through this deeper discovery about him, I knew I didn't have, even remotely, enough in common. These are things that didn't come up on our phone call. I usually like to go to coffee first, but HE asked me to dinner.
Credit to /h/miners
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women: "why are you going to dinner on a first date, you should try something simpler"
also women: "coffee or walking first dates are boring, why don't you put in more effort"
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Going to a bar is the correct first date. Why are scrotes so r-slurred smdh.
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"why do you want to go to bar on a first date, are you trying to get her drunk to take advantage of her"
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yes
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Only brain damaged foids think that, so it's a good screener anyway.
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if you're screening out brain damaged foids you're left with nothing
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GOOD advice
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so...all of them. all foids think that.
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A lot of comedy clubs have bars in them - and even if the date goes poorly, at least you got to see a fun show
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yanno...a walking date is a good thing to suggest when meeting someone online. if they get offended and say no, it means they are too fat to actually walk!
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Walking date? Red flag he is poor and doesn’t care about you. Divorce him now before you meet
Read what I wrote above. Now picture in your head that I put a /s at the end. Good job sweaty!
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wasn;t
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I like these threads since you can always tell who the foids are.
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Lmao these foids think they're such hot shit that them gracing you with an evening of their time and allowing you to pay for their food and drinks before ghosting you is a pleasant evening and not a waste of time
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It's just the blatant lack of empathy. Not to be confused with feeling sorry for the guy, but they see a story about a guy who pays for a dinner and then gets ghosted and think "well I've had dates that didn't result in anything and I enjoyed them so that's fine". They're just completely ignoring the fact that they probably didn't pay, and might have been the ones ghosting.
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Average deluded western narcissistic foid
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OP makes the great point that if she wants to hang out at your house without any financial incentive (like you paying for stuff) it's much more likely that her main incentive is getting her hands on your asscheeks.
But he's pretty dumb to think that in the modern age of dating women are gonna want their first date to be at a total strangers house... that's literally like the opening plot of a slasher movie. He's unnecessarily filtering out women who don't want to be murdered
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He's necessarily filtering out terminally online true crime consoomers
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Yeah but OP is probably running into the problem that western women don’t want to “date” per se. I’d say it’s pretty standard to have s*x on the first “date” and play it “casual” until the woman maybe brings up the question a few months later on “what are we”. I’ve had similar experiences to OP where a dinner date doesn’t pan out to anything (oh wow you really know how to treat a woman but I’m x y z so no) but a casual hangout at the beach leads to a hookup (they’ll still ghost afterwards, prob bc of my weak peepee game or something lmao). Dating sucks
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Just out of curiosity, how old are you versus the women you date? This sounds like good advice but I'm not sure if it would be relevant to my age group
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I’m in my late twenties, my last few dates were with (in order of recency):
-19
-late 30s
-mid 30s
-early 30s
-late 20s (ex)
They’re all educated, fit, career women (except the 19 yo, she’s in college).
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Ah, gotcha, that makes sense. I'm in my mid-forties and even though I'm pretty good looking for somebody my age, I'm no longer at the level where attractive women just want to hop into bed with me right away. Still getting used to dating again after my divorce.
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This happened to me a week ago, she (biofoid) chose to come over, have coffee and teach me knitting. Very wholesome but my L in the end because I wanted a relationship and she didn't. I even had a higher libido than her - she wanted to frick earlier and I didn't.
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Hoes mad
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These cute twinks watch too much fricking tv. Reddit is overwhelmingly full of "men" that talk like uptight housewives from the 80s. You aren't going to get murdered because you went on a date.
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Meanwhile there are 20 y/o 5'6" skinny twinks happily strolling into a different muscle guy they have never met before's apartment to have their bussy dominated every weekend.
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your opener on dating apps should be "Do you enjoy true-crime" if the answer is yes, unmatch and move on
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That could be some good bait for reddit. Post some screencaps of yourself doing that to /r/tinder or something and read the seethe in the comments.
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I don't think it's moids dropping this take
Jarvis pull up demographic data on true crime media consumption
Current hyperfixation:
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I seriously don't understand moids who take women out to dinner on the first date. It's going to be some combination of too formal, too long/you get stuck with a bad match. You hook up in someone's place, or you get drinks. Simple as. If she doesn't want to go to a bar, she's boring. My first date with my now-fiancee was at a cute wine bar.
The only exception to the no dinner rule is that you're traveling and want company, and you know from the interaction that it's going to go well anyway. I'd done this a few times and never ran into the hungry foid looking for a free meal thing; it always ended in banging. Reddit moids must be out there offering to take girls who only reply "hey" to dinner, lmao.
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You are either a lesbian (
)
Or a FtM (interested in a trouple?
)
Bars are where you pick the broad up, your first date should be a sporting event or something actually exciting not more of the same, you alcholic abdominal abomination
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Most moids aren’t looking for broads who barcrawl
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I mean hes kind of right. If you want a girl to frick you or keep talking make her pay, if you've ever used Bumble or Tinder you learn quick.
Don't ask me about how woman psych works, idk and idc, but making them pay for stuff increases your chance of getting laid like 100x. There is no reason or logic behind it, just accept it for what it is.
Also when they ask what you do for work best answer is "between jobs". They eat it up. Not a single Bumble foid fricked me after hearing I work at a hedge fund. Making good money gives ick vibes bestie.
Note I'm only talking about online dating and city foids. Doesn't really apply to women who don't have multiple prescriptions or mental health issues. If you're in the burbs or rural shes probably not cripplingly mentally r-slurred so you shouldn't act like a loser.
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This checks out, the one guy in my social circle that fricks the most women (that are attractive) is a mid 30s balding bisexual moid that is homeless (err really, he’s hobosexual so he sleeps with women to have a place to stay lmfao). He goes through a lot of women so often times they’ll text or fricking call me crying about how he is just using them and is sleeping with other women. Like yeah no shit, he’s sleeping with 5 different women at any given time AND getting his bussy blasted/blasting bussy.
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if i were to guess, women who frick on the first date are probably progressive enough to also believe that women should pay half the bill?
honestly kinda crazy to me that there are women who actually pay half the bill. it always seemed sorta like one of those things you'd see ppl pretend they do on reddit but never actually happens irl. i can't imagine casual s*x with a stranger could be worth paying for but that's just going off like 70% of women not being able to c*m from PIV, and who tf is eating out strange random kitty?
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You never go to dinner on a first date in person. Get a coffee or drink or something.
Too many hoes out there looking for a free meal and they will get away with it too.
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I legit feel so sorry for straggots.
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I thought this was common knowledge that a lot of women on dating apps are just their for free stuff. This is part of the reason I started doing lunch dates and tell the young guys I work with the same thing. Lunch date means small cheap meal and if they're cool everything is open since it's still day time. Cheap things like parks, flea markets, etc area all open and available.
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Scrotes waking up would be good for society but I have no hope
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Snapshots:
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21 days ago
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