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Pingspam is a crime against humanity.

Picture this all-too familiar scenario: You've been travelling across the internet wastelands, dragging your feet across a barron digital void of empty information, a spiritually draining technological labyrinth . You open up your home page, to see a shining light upon your bell, a beacon of hope. Someone has repsonded to you, someone cared enough to hear what you have to say to the world. Even if they disagree, they have a shared interest in your deep personal thoughts. Your heart is filled with joy, the dopamine rushes through your brain in excitement. "What could it be?" you wonder. But your hopes are in complete vain, for what lies before you has turned out to be monstrous illusion.

It was nothing. No, worse than nothing. Heinous noise, a mirage of interest that exploited your intellectual loneliness only to give way to a screeching bunch of nonsensical irrelevant information that has pulled you further down in your descent towards eternal irreversible madness. You've seen it before, you know this sting like an old friend. But you had to keep coming to it, over and over again, like a hopeless romantic, an addict that doesn't know when to quit. Pingspam is like a virus, a disease on our world and on our minds. Pingspam is a digital molotov, a fire of frustration, a sucker punch to our sense of novelty. Ping spammers wreak havoc at a subliminal level, a force that appears subtle at first but builds to a crescendo, wreaking havoc on society. It must be fought tooth and nail.

Arrest ping spammers.

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@kaamrev FRICKING LOVE PINGING AND @kaamrev LOVE SUCKING PEEPEE

@kaamrev DON'T EVEN PING FOR ATTENTION ANYMORE @kaamrev JUST LIKE FILLING UP THE INBOX OF PEOPLE WITH @kaamrev's BULLSHIT

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You may love sucking peepee but do you tongue butt?

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How many ping groups can people ping in one comment for free? You should get one free ping and pay for all other regardless of how many groups you join.

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calm down spez

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My adderall just kicked in and I just did my UV therapy so I'm full of energy and today it's all going into notif rage.

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UV therapy

She's taunting us mayos for being affected by UV radiation. Jannies! Jannies!!! Ban her for subtly mentioning our genetic defects.

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Actually my comment was highlighting one of the few benefits of your lack of melanin....at least when it comes to those of us accustomed to air conditioned living. I get severely vitamin D deficient without sun exposure (I also supplement cuz I'm not touching grass longer than necessary).

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https://media.tenor.com/aClw0nnYfeYAAAAx/who-is-this-seinfeld.webp

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Pings are why we're here!

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!oldstrags !historychads !trekkies

Remember this song? Tell the border guard that your name is Jean-Luc Picard of the United Federation of Planets.

#just90sKids

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https://i.rdrama.net/images/1735427027ZqQshaojfsqHTg.webp

:marsey#chadyestalking:

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What if pinging is just a way for a bunch of r-slurs here to find eachother?

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the joke was actually that I completely ignore pings so even if people are trying to show me stuff I don't see it :marseythumbsup:

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r*pes you

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wtf @Lappland your wife just r*ped me!!!

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It's about to be twice if you don't stop being such a tattletale little b-word

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wtf @CHRISTMAS-LOVER-25 lappland and grue are raping me nonstop please save me!!!

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I wish llapland and grue would r*pe me nonstop :marseysob:

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>wife

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...are we...are we a bunch of r-slurs?

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:marseyagree: :marseysulk: :marseycry: :marseyitsover:

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I believe that you were joking but I needed to say it anyway just to make sure...

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:marseyyokaiwatch:

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I think you just won the internet forever

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!followers I just won the internet forever

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More comments

:#propto:

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