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My students cheated... A lot • crumplab

https://crumplab.com/articles/blog/post_994_5_26_22_cheating/index.html

https://crumplab.com/articles/blog/post_994_5_26_22_cheating/index.html This is the tale of a University Professor who must be a goddarn boomer or something, idk. It's hard for me to see someone with the programming chops to do all the data collection, analysis, and automation of penalties/forms be such a goddarn idiot who not only thought his students weren't cheating before, wouldn't go on a snitch hunt when the cheating is revealed, and also unironically believed they would stop cheating once he asked them to.

The highlight of the story for me is in part 5 when he asks people to write an apology letter saying they won't cheat anymore. One fricking idiot copy-pasta's an apology they found online. They literally tried to cheat on the "sorry for cheating, I won't do it again" essay. The professor emails them back a link of where they plagiarized their apology from, and the student writes back "no, I actually stole it from this other site.

The tweet for some reactions: https://twitter.com/MattCrumpLab/status/1529896172231458816

As one Twitter User summarizes: "It reads like the university pedagogy equivalent of the world's greatest detective who also happens to be the world's most credulous probation officer." https://twitter.com/RogueWPA/status/1531700754846654466

Others tie it to the collapse of University standards over the last half a century: https://twitter.com/kitten_beloved/status/1531406440816029696 Following that thread leads to some juicy takes like https://twitter.com/MrGeorgeFrancis/status/1528352527397314561 and his blogpost https://georgefrancis.substack.com/p/imposter-syndrome-is-among-us?sd=fs&s=r That post includes this hilarious tweet, with the quote "Responses to the tweet were in denial and can be characterised by the internet jargon ‘seethe and cope’":

It’s so funny when I read academics (women) write about “imposter syndrome.” I had the exact opposite feeling, like I was the only insightful and serious person and everyone else was doing fake stuff. Seems like the imposter syndrome people should trust their instincts. https://twitter.com/RichardHanania/status/1527689272119070720

Another thing teaching related if you're in the mood for more WORDS WORDS WORDS: I managed to track down a mysterious memoir that had been mostly-purged from the respectable part of the internet, hunting down a ghost from @collectijism 's memories https://rdrama.net/post/25729/someone-get-me-out-of-this/2004316?context=8#context leading to https://degalantha.livejournal.com/4575.html which is the "lived experience" of a public school teacher who taught mostly black kids and came away with the impression that they're all irredeemably dumb as bricks, and he's tired of pretending they're not. One thing that amuses me about this sort of stuff, besides the Lee Jussim angle of "ok, but stereotype accuracy is real", is that I actually have no idea if people are reasonably good at gauging the intelligence of the people around them. I've been safely cordoned off from normies for most of my life thanks to the gifted programs of public schools, and it was always a shock when I interacted with dumber people, but I think I stopped interacting with dumb people irl for at least 12 years now, besides the most minimal stuff like buying groceries. I feel like it's pretty easy to tell within an hour-long conversation with someone if they're dumb, but I'm not sure how accurate that actually is, because we don't all walk around with our IQ's tattooed on our heads. I feel like I wouldn't even know where to meet a dumb person. Despite all the shit you can talk about redditors or tweeters, or whatever, they're all still self-selected to be the kinds of people who can read and write at an 8th grade level, meaning they're above the 50th percentile of the US: https://www.wyliecomm.com/2021/08/whats-the-latest-u-s-literacy-rate/ . Dumb people are likely completely invisible to me. I am very curious on if any of the education academics that think the issue is sociocultural differences that impede black performance are like me: totally bubbled off, and therefore completely unable to tell if a post like this is a horrible "racist screed against black students" or "literally just how it is, and likely will be for a long time".

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Tl;dr but there was a scandal in a friend of mines engineering school when it turned out literally every Chinese kid was cheating but then the profs got in trouble for racism for noticing (lol)

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My university had the same thing but with indians as I remember. They has a “bible” of all the test and homework material they passed around.

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Every course through university would give out past tests to study with. Then I had one course where they didn't, but fortunately someone in a group chat had a copy of last year's test. I studied the frick out of that, then it ended up being almost identical to the real test lmao. Lesson: profs that reuse test questions are idiots who deserve everything they get.

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I remember my math professors would assign 100+ problems a weekend (and 50+ between classes), and the 2-3 people with chegg.com subscriptions would share all the answers in a group chat and had six hour long fill-a-thons every weekend

It was electronically graded, so they just had to click a few times to assign what would take 10+ pages to print

Sometimes, people would double-fil-a-thon in someone else's account in exchange for favors just because it took so long to format some of those complex math expressions correctly

Only a few people were ever working out problems, and if they were, they were taking varients of the problem and filling out the pattern.


:marseyreading: oh, we found this problem on chegg with 2 and 4 as the red numbers that change, and we noticed that the final expression has 1/2x and 16x at the end

:marseyreading: so for your problem you should try typing in 1x and 25x on the only part of the expression that changes, because you have 1 and 5 as your numbers, and this matches every other pattern for this problem when it has different numbers

:marsoyhype: I collected more chegg screenies of the next problems

:marseycowboy:bruh what im so confused... what?

:marseyreading: don't worry just type in what I said

:marseycowboy: ok done, anyone have this version of problem 24 a)?

:marseydoomer: WTF MY 23 DIDN'T WORK I ONLY HAVE TWO TRIES LEFT!?!??

:marseyreading: send screenshot

:marseydoomer: [grainy photo of computer screen]

:marseytrad: on the left side of the expression, you accidentally have split it into two parts, so it thinks it's multiplying two things...🙁

:marseydoomer: so its just a formatting problem again, but we have the numbers

:marseyreading: try typing things in this order to where it looks like [this.jpg]

:marseycowboy:Wow thanks bro... hour two of trying to get all these done so my eyes are starting to hurt, haha

:marsoyhype: Why do we have to take this shit? I'm never going to program anything involving calculus bc when I work on games the engine will handle 3d stuff

:marseytrad: Ok everyone, lets all memorize how to do this one, I think it might be on the test because it's actually on my lecture notes for once 🤣🤣🤣

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You sat down and wrote all this shit. You could have done so many other things with your life. What happened to your life that made you decide writing novels of bullshit on rdrama.net was the best option?

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WHAT THE ACTUAL FRICK IS WRONG WITH ME

:marseycry:

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I thought it was a cute exchange :@kony_2022pat:


Follower of Christ :marseyandjesus: Tech lover, IT Admin, heckin pupper lover and occasionally troll. I hold back feelings or opinions, right or wrong because I dislike conflict.

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That's because I immediately chopped 3/4 of it off, and turned it into the abridged version where :marsoyhype: and :marseytrad: don't fight at the end

:marseythumbsup:

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post the director's cut.

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More comments

I miss when my groupchats were like that. Made chem so much better (frick ALEKS).

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The first commandment of Progressive Wokism:

THOU SHALT NOT NOTICE.

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Say what you will but they work hard, they just suck at English. The only difference between them and me is I would not have the balls to brazenly cheat if I took a class at a Chinese school

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Chinks do nothing but copy/imitate/steal/cheat. They have no original ideas.

!blackjack105

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Ive bought so many essays online there’s probably a building named after me in Bangladesh idgaf writing is gay.

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"Why does this white kid keep mentioning "doing the necessary " and calling people "kind sirs" in all his papers?

:#marseytunaktunak:

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Why is my student asking for "sexy s*x" at the end of every paper?

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doing the needful

!blackjack105

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insanely based

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Congrats r-slur. Why half butt a paper for an A when you can pay for the privilege.

Do you pay the bull to frick your wife too? It seems like it might be hard to frick her yourself.

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What is with you people and your obsession with cuckoldry.

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ok fine. Do you pay a nurse to sponge you down since showering is so much effort? You shouldn't be proud of posting L's.

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I absolutely would if I could afford it that sounds awesome.

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lol ok fair

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That's why you only cheat together with your frat bros or a social circle. :marseythumbsup:

COVID-19 was great tho, here at Budapest Technical University the average grade went up by 30-40%:marseyxd: If people saw those groomercord servers I don't think I would have a degree and perhaps would be banned from higher education forever. We have basically skipped two of the hardest semesters with a 4 average. One of my friends didn't know what a Poisson distro or Bayes theorem is after 2 semesters of applied statistics and probability and couldn't use R beyond copy-pasting code and changing the name of the functions. Absolutely based dude and still ended up as a data scientist.

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