I'm glad I found this sub. I'm feeling incredibly discouraged. The world just doesn't feel like a safe place no matter where you go.

How do you all handle the feelings around shame when society/people in the mental healthy field fat-shame you?

Obviously, I'm not working with this therapist anymore. But my immediate reaction is to hide away and revert back to what I used to do (diet).

Thanks for reading. I think I'm just looking for encouragement and empathy from people who understand.

/u/CatBird2023:

Sorry this happened to you.

I was working with a therapist a few years ago and I thought she was a great fit. I started discussing body image, intuitive eating, the anti-diet approach, etc. and I thought she was actually onside. Then at a subsequent appointment, she recommended a book she'd recently read and it turned out to be a diet book. [sad trombone] I was so disappointed that I went home and cried.

I purposely sought out a new therapist who was trained in the Body Trust approach, and surprise, it's been a much safer place for me.

Something that's helped me be a bit more... forgiving?... is to remind myself that we are all immersed in diet culture and anti-fat prejudice, like a fish in water. People don't always understand that what they're doing/saying is harmful, because it's seen as normal. Now, it's no excuse to be cruel or to discriminate, and we all have an obligation to educate ourselves and do better. But everyone's on their own journey, I guess.

I want to share a positive experience ✨️

I have a new fwb and the first time we were together he caressed my belly. I remember noticing he did but I did not have negative thoughts or reactions. It just was. Later when we were cuddling he squeeze my roll softly, for a moment I giggle and I wondered if maybe he thought it was my breast but it was a quick passing thought and not a negative one.

When I was home later that night I was thinking back to those moments and how before I would hope the person I was with wouldn't notice or touch or be turned off by my belly. I thought about all the work and tears I have shed to get to this point of accepting my body as is. To accept if as part of everything I am and I felt emotional but proud of myself.

The next time we were together we were making out and he touched my belly again and I asked him what he was doing bc he was touching the side of my underbelly and just holding it and he said he was just feeling my body and then we kissed.

It only took years of therapy, and journaling, lots of crying sessions, packing my social media with bodies that look like mine, saying out loud that I am fat to get here. I am 37 years old and I am finally here.

I don't need anything from this post other than to hopefully give some of you hope that it can be done but you might need to do a little work. And maybe lots of fake it till you make it.

/u/greenteasmoothie138:

This was how I knew my husband was the one. No man had ever seen me 100% naked. Lights were always off, shirt was worn, or towel/sheet was wrapped. I remember one day after having s*x when we were dating I was in the bathroom with him waiting for the shower to heat up. We were talking about something, can't remember, and I felt comfortable. Then I thought, “Holy shit! I'm naked!” I didn't even notice for like a full five minutes and that meant something. We are going on 10 years and he sees me naked daily.

/u/promiscuous-girl1:

Some people genuinely don't see fat as anything negative and one time I was so upset about something my bf said but for him it was completely innocent and him just enjoying my body, anyways thank you for sharing 😁

Burgers seething

Just walk 2 miles every day? i don't see what the problem is.

!thin

She did a video on all the dead fat influencers. lol

Speaking of, how tf did boogie make it to 50?

pic.twitter.com/OX4TVZ5i53

— Clown World ™ 🤡 (@ClownWorld_) December 14, 2023

https://x.com/Meme_Merchant/status/1735218711164834204

I no longer eat more calories than I burn on any given day.

I also keep increasing the weights that I exercise with every day.

I am now at 24 kg Barbell curls.

My arms literally look like the muscle arm emoji in text conversations.

My belly is disappearing every day.

I am planning to max out crunches and squats the rest of the month.

I am going to be fit by the end of 2023.

I also got a generic haircut that now makes me look like a 7/10. I might go as far as an 8-8.5/10 once I get decent clean clothes.

I expect to looks max peak at 8.5 with some mild to moderate abs and my giant biceps and triceps carrying me along with a haircut once every two weeks and keeping basic hygiene standards and wearing clean clothes every day.

Anybody has any further advice for me?

He'd be impeached if he said it today lol

Woman Who Threw Food at Chipotle Employee Sentenced to Work Fast-Food Job

A judge reduced Rosemary Hayne's jail sentence after she agreed to work in a fast-food restaurant for 20 hours a week for 60 days.

By Rebecca Carballo

Dec. 7, 2023

Updated 7:21 a.m. ET

A woman in Ohio who threw a burrito bowl at a Chipotle worker and was convicted of assault has been sentenced to an unusual punishment that includes working in fast food for two months.

Back in September, during a dinner rush and while a restaurant in Parma was short-staffed, Emily Russell, then the store manager, said she made and then remade an order for Rosemary Hayne.

Ms. Hayne was not satisfied with the final product. In a video shared widely online, she can be seen yelling at Ms. Russell before hurling the burrito bowl at her face.

“I didn't expect it at all,” Ms. Russell, 26, said. “I just blinked and there was sour cream dripping from my hair.”

Eventually, someone called the police, Ms. Russell said.

Judge Timothy Gilligan of Parma Municipal Court sentenced Ms. Hayne to 180 days in jail, with 90 days suspended, court records show.

The judge offered her a chance to reduce her sentence, with a catch — 60 of those days would be suspended if she worked 20 hours a week for 60 days at a fast-food restaurant, said Joseph O'Malley, Ms. Hayne's lawyer.

Ms. Hayne, 39, agreed to take the judge up on his offer, he said. She must complete her time as a fast-food worker by the time she reports to jail in March.

Mr. O'Malley said he believed the sentencing was fair.

“Here's a lady that's almost 40 years old, that never had any type of criminal record at all and then has this one bad day,” he said. “I was imploring the judge to not let this one day define her.”

Ms. Hayne has had interviews, but it's unclear if she had landed a fast-food job yet, Mr. O'Malley said.

The sentencing came as a surprise to Ms. Russell.

“I thought she was going to get a slap on the wrist, but she didn't. She is going to get to walk in my shoes,” Ms. Russell said.

She said she still thought about that day, when she went to the back of the restaurant to wipe the food off. Her face was red and irritated from the hot food hitting it, she said.

She called her mother, cried and then finished the remaining four hours of her shift, she said. Then she went to a hospital and was released soon after.

Ms. Russell has since left her job at Chipotle.

She said she didn't feel supported by the chain after working the rest of her shift that night and not getting the next day off.

Chipotle did not immediately respond to comment late Wednesday night.

Now Ms. Russell is working at Raising Cane's, a fast-food chain founded in Baton Rouge, La., and she hasn't let the incident sour her view of the food service industry.

“I've been in the food industry for nine years, and I love it,” she said. “I just love customers.”

“I'm probably the only restaurateur in the entire world who is unapologetically telling you that my food is bad for you, that it will kill you, and you should stay away from it,” said Basso.

He then revealed a clear plastic bag filled with a powder-like substance. “I'm here with the cremated remains of someone who died at my restaurant. He died of a heart-attack at my restaurant, and I'm putting the bag clearly on the table. I wish that Burger King, McDonalds, and everyone else would do the same thing.”

“John, wait… hold on one second,” sputtered a clearly shocked Liu. “This is getting a little grim. You're saying you have the actual cremated remains of someone who died at your restaurant?”

“Absolutely,” replied Basso, “because the entire fast-food industry is pretty grim.”

The Heart Attack Grill sells a burger called the Octuple Bypass, featuring 8 patties, 40 slices of bacon, a mound of cheese, and comes to 20,000 calories. They offer no diet sodas, all their milkshakes have tequila, and they sell unfiltered cigarettes on the menu next to the food.

If you weigh over 350 pounds then you can step up to the scale to be weighed, and you get to eat free.

The waitresses are dressed like slutty nurses and paddle you publicly if you don't finish your food.

Based informercial

Count the men in this audience! (This is the only picture in the article that appears to have any men in it.)

This article is by Jackie Molloy, a photojourn*list who for her website was careful to take only a close-up of the upper third of her body. She doesn't give others the same courtesy.

Highlights:

• "bodies that were curvaceous and took up space."

• "fat bodies"

• "bigger bodied people"

• "plus size"

• "those living in larger bodies"

• "living in fat bodies"

• "people who live in fat bodies"

• "lives in a bigger body"

The founders tried to make the event, which was hosted at Temple University, as accessible as possible for everyone, with elevators, a ramp and strong metal chairs to support everyone in attendance, although some felt there wasn't enough space in the panel room.

"Unfortunately, the cycle perpetuates — it costs more money for us to take up space, even at events that are focused on doing so!" Donnelle Jageman explains.

Next year, they hope to find a bigger space and rent accessible and size-inclusive furniture.

I have a daughter in 8th grade, her school had an event on Friday that I picked her up from. The event was in the gym and there were a mixture of parents who were just waiting in the parking lot outside but also a lot were going inside so I decided to as well, it was some big start to the holiday season/winter event so I wanted to see how they gym was decorated.

Anyway, me going inside was kind of an impromptu thing. I went into the gym and after a minute or so spotted my daughter who was standing around with a few other girls. They started walking in my direction and I waved to flag her down, she looked at me quickly but walked right passed me even when I tried to talk to her. I just kind of stood there confused and watched her say bye to these girls and then went directly into the locker room without coming over or acknowledging me. I didn't feel comfortable going into the kids' locker room so I just stood and waited for a few minutes and then got a text from her saying she'd meet me in the car. I didn't think much of it, I thought maybe she was busy talking and didn't want me to stand around and wait longer.

I went back to the car and she came out just a few minutes later. This is when I realized something was off. Those same girls she was talking to before in the gym started to walk by my car and my daughter actually ducked/tried to cover her face from them seeing her. I said what are you doing??? She told me to just drive and leave already. Her and I are close and she doesn't normally snap at me so I didn't know how to respond. I started driving and we just sat there in silence for a minute and then I asked her if she wants to tell me what's going on.

She told me she was sorry but she didn't want anyone to see her with me. I asked why and my jaw nearly hit the floor when she said it's because of how I look (there's literally nothing she could be referring to here other than my weight) and she didn't want to get picked on over it. I could stand to lose about 40-50lbs but I'm not to the point of public spectacle so I was shocked and confused. I told her that really hurt my feelings and I didn't understand where it was coming from and then she started crying saying she's fat and she didn't want the kids to see me and think we're the “fat family”. My daughter is NOT fat, she has a naturally wider frame but does several sports and is very active and healthy.

I had no idea she felt this way about herself which broke my heart even more than her apparent embarrassment of me. I assured her she's not fat at all and those girls wouldn't ever have those thoughts if they're her real friends and I sympathized with how she felt but to ignore me in public the way she did wasn't okay. She apologized and it's over now but geez, I've never felt so bad about myself.

I guess I'm just trying to vent and also get some advice as a parent with a young teen who is clearly starting to have body image issues.

I m 6'3 and 365lbs. No issues on any rides at Disney World. They're the most accommodating. Also use the bucket seat on Tron.

6'5” 350. The lap bar on Seven Dwarfs was a close call for me. Legs squeezed real tight to make that work. Otherwise no issues. But I haven't gone on some of the rides with the super customized ride vehicles though

5'11", 300. I carry a lot of my weight in my hips and while I do fit on Seven Dwarfs Mine Train, I find it uncomfortable enough that I skip it unless I'm visiting with someone who hasn't ridden it before.

Looks like 300 lbs is the minimum weight on this subreddit.

I know this isn't what you asked but as a fellow struggler and whose weight fluctuates, I approach Disney differently depending on my weight. My tips: If you plan on wearing shorts, get anti chafing rub or wear bike shorts underneath. The chub rub is stronger in Disney as you are more active than your typical normal day. If you can, pack a peppermint foot cream to put on your feet at night to help soothe your feet. Enjoy the shows (The Tiki room, carousel of progress, The Lion King, Beauty and the Beast etc). It will give you a chance to get off your feet, sit and rest while being entertained.

I second this. Treat it like an athletic event, because it is! Wear great supportive shoes (I recommend Hoka sneakers; Oofos recovery sandals for afterward.) Wear good socks (I love Bombas.) Put anti-chafing cream on your thighs, arms, and on your feet. Drink water. Consider taking something like Liquid IV with you to add to drinking water in the parks. The amount of walking is, well it's a lot, but it is manageable. Just make some deliberate decisions to keep yourself as comfortable as possible.

It's totally normal to have to powder your fat disgusting thighs and also walking around a theme park is an athletic event.

300 pounds isn't too extreme in terms of the average American. You might have trouble fitting on TRON and Seven Dwarves might be a little tight but that's about it. Nothing at Disney is SO intense or crazy that requires strict ride restrictions. Universal can be different but if you're focused on Disney you'll be fine.