At the airport right now, going to see the bf soon (yayyy~~)

When I went through security, it DIDNT highlight my peepee (normally it does). Does this mean that I was clocked? Did the man pressing the buttons press "male" on me? Or perchance has my peepee flown under the radar, undetected by the machine? Has HRT finally atrophied it enough?

Transwomen, what experience do you have with these machines? I need to know if i pass or not !cuteandvalid

I am NOT OP. Original post by /u/pqsp in /r/AskMen

trigger warnings: none

mood spoilers: >!positive!<

Guys, I fricked up. This amazing man has told me he's falling in love with me. I haven't told him I'm a trans woman. Should I just run away? - 2/23/2014

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/1yrqr3/guys\_i\_fricked\_up\_this\_amazing\_man\_has\_told\_me\_hes/

He's charming and sweet, and handsome and romantic, and thoughtful, and everything basically a girl could want from a guy. He has a degree, a great job, is career oriented, wants a family, a serious relationship....we're the same age^(26&27).

But I neglected to tell him I'm trans. I KNOW that I can't keep this from him any longer, I've already delayed having s*x with him because I haven't had bottom and I didn't want him to find out.

He found me, courted me, everything. It sucks guys. What do I do?

I guess what I really want to know(because I assume most of you probably hate me by this point) is what would you do if the girl you were falling in love with came clear and told you she was trans?

I feel like I should just run away? Would that be best?

thanks /r/askmen

updatesss

hey /r/askmen thanks for taking the time to share you suggestions; and at times hilarious and dejected commentary; but none the less, still very insightful. I'll post an update soon and let you guys know what happens.

ps, if you hate me now because of this thread, ya know, maybe in twenty years shit will pan out, but until then since we'll all eventually die anyway, i'm going to make my self happy in the meantime. peace and love

---

Top Comment:

>If you run away, he'll be confused and hurt. If you tell him the truth... well, he might be hurt, he might be angry, he might be accepting, there are all sorts of possibilities and few of them are good.

>I'll say this, though: running away might spare your own feelings, but it won't spare his.

​

2nd Top Comment:

>Unfortunately, as a transwoman, you need to be upfront when you're starting relationships with men. (At least, from my perspective as a cismale. I really have no idea whether my opinion is standard in the trans community, or if my opinion is considered transphobic.) One concerning thing is the fact that he wants a family. Typically, when men say that, they're not thinking of adoption. It's probable that he wants children that are biologically his. And you shouldn't run away from him. You should accept responsibility for your actions, and explain yourself to your SO. You like this man a lot and he deserves the truth. By running away, the only person you're serving is yourself.

>Now, if it turned out that the girl I was dating and loved came out that she was really a transwoman, I would be extremely hurt, confused, and probably angry. For me, personally, being a transwoman is a deal breaker. But I'm not your boyfriend, so don't assume that it's a dealbreaker for him too

>And I don't hate you at all. I'm sympathetic and I feel bad for you. I don't feel bad for you because there's anything wrong, inherently or otherwise, with being a transwoman (Duh, there obviously isn't anything wrong with it!). I feel bad because you're in a situation like this, where you feel like you have to hide who you are from people, in order to date. This is a situation I totally relate to -- this hiding who you are business, out of fear that no one in their right mind would want to be with you.

/u/pqsp (OOP): I don't know why but your comment made me cry. Thanks for a well thought out reply.

---

I'm that trans woman who neglected to tell her BF and I asked you all for advice. Did you guys want an update? - 2/28/2014

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskMen/comments/1z6sdm/im\_that\_trans\_woman\_who\_neglected\_to\_tell\_her\_bf/

Here's my OP: Guys, I fricked up. This amazing man has told me he's falling in love with me. I haven't told him I'm a trans woman. Should I just run away? [link removed]

The most common pieces of advice almost all of you had:

Was not to disappear, not to just run away.

Be honest with him and own up to it

Be prepared for the worst

I'm actually trying to keep this post short, and if there's any questions about the dynamics, feel free to ask.

The discussion started with us listing off the reasons why we are attracted to each other, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically. After, I came out to him. He said his mind was blown and that his entire world view was turned upside down. That he never, ever, imagined anyone could do this, and that he felt bad saying that but his image of trans people was NOT me.

He never yelled at me once. He never cussed at me once, he asked questions that were important to him and assured me they weren't to "study me" but were because he wanted to know my soul. I have so much respect for this man....

He asked about my youth, when I first knew, when I transitioned, etc. I told him everything.

In the end one of the most mature things he admitted was I had everything to lose. He recognized how much I cared for him and that I cared enough to tell him the truth when it could have meant losing the guy I am falling in love with.

I'm so happy, and I really want to say thanks /r/AskMen I really needed the "guys advice" for this situation. I don't know what I would have done without your community. Thanks ;)

---

Top Comment (Editor's note, added comments per feedback in this thread) :

​

>So you are still together? If so, congratulations!

/u/pqsp (OOP): yes :) thanks!

​

>Wow, he sounds like an amazing person. I think I'm a pretty good guy, and I think I would have ran! I think most men would have!You're lucky he doesn't want kids. Well...I guess adoption is always an option.

​

/u/pqsp (OOP):

He does want kids. So do I. We both think adoption is beautiful and I'm positive that if in the future we end up getting married we would definitely adopt.

---

Reminder - I am not the original poster.

I would have around 10k DC to put towards the /h/femme hole.

Would.

But @X barraged me with shit awards. Now I have 85. Basically none.

It's all gone. I'm sorry donors, all of the money that you generously donated has been stolen my our evil resident transphobe.

Not sure what to do anymore... !cuteandvalid

Love,

@Its_a_fetish

posting on their behalf if you didn't get the idea

After this inglorious attack on my femininity and womanhood, it has come to my attention that we need a place for all women. For this purpose, I humbly ask you for donations towards that goal. Unfortunately I am penniless as I spent my money on ban awarding chuds (especially FroCho). Any money that you can provide in this trying time would be greatly appreciated. Also, if anyone wants to get me a deflector, that would be gratefully appreciated (i have a bad feeling about this)

im literally screaming, @VEGETA

omg! @A

@GeorgeSoros

!women !neofoids !metashit !cuteandvalid

A "gender critical" artist set out to do portraits of 100 "detransitioned women" nearly 2 years ago. I suspected it was taking her so long (she's only at 56 worldwide) that some subjects would begin to drop out (change of opinion? Retransition?) and so it has turned out to be. 1/ pic.twitter.com/kLuWVaMSX6

— Aidan Comerford (@AidanCTweets) January 4, 2024

Oh no no no....TERF sisters I thought this was a detransition epidemic?

male privilege is dysphoria inducing

Idk being a woman is harder yah, but it honestly wasn't too rough of an adjustment. I already knew what I was getting into, i knew if he sexually harassed, I knew men wouldn't listen to me, I knew I'd be objectified. And it's not like it was sudden, those things just became more common over the months until I was stealth and it plateaued. Obviously experiencing it is different than knowing g about it and it was a bit intense feeling that fear from being harassed the first time but idk you learn pretty fast what with how resocialization works physiologically.

Plus I was barely aware of my life when I was a boy, it was all a dissociative haze so I didn't really notice much of the privilege or much of anything at all

real

trans women don't get access to male privilege pre-transition

we also don't really get access to female privilege post-transition unless you're a gigapassoid stacy, so we lose either way

!cuteandvalid !lgbt !besties

So, over the past few days, some people have posted asking about what this place is/what kind of website this is. Many wonder, is this place actually supportive of trans? Or is it just all one big transphobic joke? Fear not, for I will answer your questions.

Basics

On rDrama, you can either post to the main feed, or post to a hole. This hole (/h/transgender) is a supportive place. The outside website, not so much. I'm transb-word, the moderator of this hole. I will ban users at my discretion in order to maintain decorum and a positive atmosphere. If you post outside this hole, however, I can't help you (and the site admins definitely won't, more on them later). But here, as long as you follow the rules (don't be a chud and don't be a peepee), I'm happy to help you, and I will ban with prejudice anybody who dares to defy those two rules.

rDrama, at its heart, is a place for people who love drama to gather. Our love of drama transcends political and social boundaries; rDrama actually has a lot of people from all around the political spectrum and a rich discourse (though wrapped in multiple layers of irony). We do lean a little chuddy, but we also have a lot of progressives as well. Indeed, there are efforts underway to encourage more drama-inciting in rightoid spheres (so that we can laugh at them too).

The most important thing to note is that people will tease you, regardless of who you are. If you are someone who does not like to be teased, do not post anything, simple as. rDrama may not be the place for you, then. In any case, don't post pictures, and if you do, post using unsee.cc. Additionally, don't submit pictures/videos/media etc. as the main post; instead add them as attachments in the text field of the post. (If you add it to the main post, you won't be able to delete it later).

The Two Power Admins

As promised, the admins you should know about. Our two poweradmins are Aevann, also known as Capy, the Rodent, or simply A, and CarpathianFlorist, also known as Carp or the Fish.

@A

A brown man who allegedly lives in Egypt but is trying to emigrate (likely to America). He is engaged to his fiancee. He's the main site administrator, and he has absolute control over the servers, database, etc. He's the top guy, and the main programmer. He is quite arrogant, and he won't help you unless you suck up to him. He doesn't quite like it when people make fun of him or tease him, and he will ban you for random shit if he feels like it.

@VEGETA

Gigachud powerjanny whose profession is shitposting. Aevann at least goes outside sometimes and has a wife and all that; carp is a pathetic piece of shit who posts chud nonsense day in and day out. Also a christian, allegedly, but based on his posting history I highly doubt that he will make it through the pearly gates. There is a video of carp cutting himself out there if you would like to see what he looks like.

Da Rules

Half of the stuff on the SITE sidebar (not this hole sidebar) is a lie. Here are the actual rules of rDrama as a whole:

1. Groomercord users get a 1-day ban.

2. Interfering with the website (hacking, spamming, etc.) will get you banned.

3. Doxxing users on the site will get you a permaban. (Note that it appears doxxing over groomercord is a-OK, i dont know of anyone who has been banned)

4. Stalking might get you banned if it is egregious enough (I wish we would just ban all stalkers...)

5. Posting a screenshot instead of a link will net you like a 15 minute ban.

6. Sexualizing minors here will get you an insta gigapermaban.

7. Don't be underage

8. Don't spread rumors about Aevann, especially rumors that he is cheating on his fiancee. (I got permabanned for that...)

Basically everything else is anarchy.

Im as brainwormed as any of those bitches and used to namestrag on there but I don't like to be mean and with the chud problem it's almost unusable. What have your experiences been on here vs there?

Are you guys fricking making this like a shade brighter pink every day or something?

Every time I load this hole I swear the pink is brighter, I'm starting to just not be able to read the text

You have been visited by the hole guardian. I am here to protect your hole.

Minha amiga acabou de ser agredida no Guaiamum Gigante, bar em Recife.

Saiu do banheiro e um elemento abordou ela:
- você é homem ou mulher?
- pq?
- pq você está no banheiro errado

Ele é esse de cinza do vídeo! RT PARA ACHARMOS ELE! pic.twitter.com/hw3cKKwYSM

— Hilario | Luis Lobianco Fake (@metheoro) December 24, 2023

Epic win for feminism