!scandicks !strayans !nooticers

Sorry guys, no rebuilding your fancy houses that burned down by the ocean in LA until there’s a new crack den installed right in the middle of the neighborhood.

The area is like D+43; this seems fair. I don’t make the rules 🤷‍♂️. pic.twitter.com/SVXM5cSCnH

— Joe Lonsdale (@JTLonsdale) January 31, 2025

When Lorraine Kelly shared her experience of menopause on her daytime TV show in 2017, she was her own last resort. Initially, she set out to interview a famous woman about her story, but everyone she approached refused.

"I thought, nobody else will talk about it so I'll do it. It was a breakthrough moment," said Kelly.

Seven years later, it often feels as though we have reached peak menopause. Michelle Obama, Salma Hayek and Gwyneth Paltrow have all been open about their experiences, encouraging women not to feel ashamed about a biological process an estimated 13 million people in the UK are now going through. And yet there's still one part of it that is barely spoken about.

Vaginal dryness.

As with so much in this realm, it took a celebrity – Davina McCall in this case – to shine a light on it. For those of us who'd assumed this symptom was a minor inconvenience, which only affected s*x and was easily remedied with the kinds of lubrication readily available from high street chemists, it was a brutal wake-up call.

"I had severe dryness, so severe that when I tried to wipe myself after going to the loo, it was so sore I was having to kind of dab," McCall said in her 2021 documentary, S*x, Myths and the Menopause. "I didn't know what it was, I had no idea that it was part of being perimenopausal."

Previously known as vulvovaginal atrophy, now rebranded as genitourinary syndrome of menopause (GSM), vaginal dryness will probably affect between 60% and 80% of women, according to various studies. It is caused by the drop in oestrogen levels, which happens as women go through menopause, causing vaginal tissue to become thinner and less elastic. Despite it being so common, one study has found that a third of female sufferers did not report it to their doctor.

This is partly because of embarrassment, says Haitham Hamoda, consultant gynaecologist and clinical lead of the menopause service at King's College Hospital. "Most GPs are well informed and offer a great service, but of course, there are variations of what you can access. Part of it is going to be what is available to you, what is offered to you, and what you feel comfortable talking about."

He continues: "You'd be surprised how many people would come and see you because they're talking about flushes and sweats and brain fog. And when you say, 'Do you have vaginal dryness?' they will say, 'Oh, yes, it's really uncomfortable'. But they never really think about bringing it up, unless you specifically ask."

Hamoda has seen women who are too sore to wear underwear. "You do find people who say clothes are uncomfortable because it's touching against the area … In extreme cases they find it uncomfortable sitting or walking."

GP and menopause expert Dr Renée Hoenderkamp has had cases like this too. "I've seen women who can't go about their daily life because of vaginal dryness. It's absolutely debilitating. They can't go to the gym any more, can't wear jeans, can't go for a bike ride, can't run up the stairs at the station. It's all just too painful."

Clare, 55, says GSM "consumed my whole life". "I used to sit in a shallow, cold bath, sobbing. It was agony, the burning never let up for one second of the day or night. Even walking was painful." It began when she was 47, but she never considered her symptoms could have anything to do with being perimenopausal because her periods were regular, and she was not having hot flushes.

But, as Hoenderkamp points out, every menopause is different: "For some women, vaginal dryness will be their first symptom, very early, even before their periods have changed. Other women won't get it until they've gone through it all. It's really individual."

She also believes that seeing dryness as just a symptom of menopause can be misleading. "Women who breastfeed for more than six months will suppress their oestrogen to a level where they may get vaginal dryness. The pill can cause it. Antidepressants. It's not just restricted to menopausal women."

The implications of vaginal dryness can go far beyond pain, says Hoenderkamp. "Once past menopause, when all of the tissue in and around the vagina and urethra dries and atrophies, women become much more susceptible to urine infections because bacteria are able to attach to the tissue."

Hamoda has also seen women avoiding or missing cervical screening due to GSM. "Sometimes you can't open the speculum because they're so dry and uncomfortable, even though, of course, you're using plenty of lubrication." In some cases, he has told patients to "take vaginal oestrogen for the next two months, then come back and we'll attempt this smear again. Sadly, this is not an uncommon scenario."

Not every doctor is aware of how to help women with GSM. Emily, 44, sought medical advice as soon as her vaginal dryness began four years ago. "It felt like there was a red hot poker inside of me," she says. She also suffered from urinary tract infections. Her GP found it so hard to reach a diagnosis that at one point he told her – on the phone – that she might simply have to prepare herself for a life of chronic pain.

As she was 40 when her symptoms began, her doctor didn't consider perimenopause. She was passed between different NHS services, given courses of antibiotics, a cystoscopy, referrals to urology, gynaecology and physiotherapy. She also paid to see a private vulval pain specialist. As all this was going on, no painkillers could make any difference, and she remained in agony.

"It's been catastrophic," she says. "The pain makes it very difficult to concentrate. I've had to give up four jobs in the space of four years. I've had to sell my house and move away from my friends because I need to have more savings in case I can't carry on working. It's had a massive effect on my mental health."

Out of desperation, Emily began to research her symptoms herself. She found out that one in 20 women go through perimenopause before they're 45, and, presuming this was what was happening to her, Emily wrote a detailed letter to her GP, asking for vaginal oestrogen. He agreed to put her on a low dose. "And within two days the burning stopped."

She is still, however, struggling with her UTI symptoms – which include needing to pee around four times an hour. While it's impossible to know what has caused this, she believes that because her infection was not treated for so long it has got worse. She is now being treated separately for her persistent UTI.

Misdiagnosis is a common thread through this condition. Dr Paula Briggs, a consultant in sexual and reproductive health at Liverpool Women's NHS Foundation Trust, reports, "It depends who the patient presents to, how likely they are to get the right diagnosis. Loads of women will be told they've got thrush."

It's a perfect storm – women reluctant to seek medical help in the first place, then a delay in being diagnosed.

"Whereas other menopausal symptoms resolve – generally they get less severe, then they stop – GSM becomes progressively worse over time and is very difficult to reverse," says Briggs. She now thinks all women should be given vaginal oestrogen at around the age of 45 as a default.

However, as oestrogen pessaries fall under the HRT umbrella, some women remain nervous due to the small increased risk of breast cancer linked to progestogen-containing forms of HRT. Hoenderkamp says that vaginal oestrogen does not carry the same risk. "It is just about as safe as houses, and very easy. I often have women who say I can't have vaginal oestrogen because I've had breast cancer. Well, you can."

Hamoda is more cautious: "Generally speaking, with breast cancer patients you would try other non-hormonal options first. But on an individual basis."

However, it is not a problem that will disappear overnight. "In terms of the oestrogen, women are not going to do it for a year and then it will all be OK. It's probably a lifelong commitment to their vagina," says Hoenderkamp.

Vaginal oestrogen is available from chemists – although it's cheaper on prescription from your GP – and there are also moisturisers and lubricants women can buy over the counter as a possible first port of call.

The message overall is clear, though. If you are uncomfortably dry, you should never suffer in silence – it's not just a part of ageing that happens to everyone, which you have to grin and bear – it's something that can be treated and, in most cases, eased.

"Awareness is key," says Hamoda. So, while there has never been so much talk about menopause as there is now, there's still a lot that needs to be said.

Some names have been changed

https://old.reddit.com/r/mildlyinfuriating/comments/1ita2zl/angry_bride_struggles_through_vows_as_guest_lets/

!thotpatrol !babykillers

Footage of civilians in the Kharkov region greeting a Russian FPV drone whilst it searches for militants. pic.twitter.com/wqPjr7CiZv

— Blackrussian (@Blackrussiantv) February 23, 2025

Most Based Comments

Basedness: 🔥🔥🔥🔘🔘

Come back after you graduate high school. Lol (78)

they don't teach you how to like people in high school and people are inherently evil and i don't need to like them if i don't want to. (-68)

Basedness: 🔥🔥🔥🔘🔘

Tolerance is for putting up with a bad smell, or physical pain, not the existence of gay people or other ethnicities. (413)

as an attractive young male, i can definitely say i barely tolerate gay people. too happy and personable. and people in general. i hate everyone equally so good luck spinning me as homophobic or racist. yes i hate gays yes i hate blacks yes i hate your pasty hairy french dad yes i hate your evil 16 year old cat. get over it (-104)

Basedness: 🔥🔥🔥🔘🔘

Forget the politics, the stuff she's saying about your relationship should be enough to drop her NOR (3521)

You people are sick who would drop your family over differences in opinion (-100)

Angriest Comments

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

i can't believe people are seriously focusing on people being gay when someone in government just did a nazi salute lmao for God's sake. and they're not not taking them back because "they're the worst of the worst", they literally are just not taking them back because it's FRICKED UP TO DO THIS TO PEOPLE 😭 he is literally sending back literal american citizens because he is getting rid of birthright citizenship. WHY ARE WE FOCUSING ON GAY PEOPLE WHEN TRUMP IS CLEARLY GOING OFF THE DEEP END??? he's trying to get FOUR MORE YEARS AGAIN. he is literally being scary. like she should be worried, period. again, why in the absolute FRICK are people focusing on gay people when WE CANNOT AFFORD HOUSING. OR GROCERIES BARELY. we are being overworked and underpaid. immigrants are being overworked and SEVERELY underpaid and blackmailed by companies bc of their legal status. THIS IS NOT WHAT AMERICA WAS SUPPOSED TO BE. SO WHY ARE THEY NOT WORRIED??? i used to think people on the left were overreacti... (0)

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

Some might say that we shouldn't sever contact with our MAGA friends and family because it will let them just fall deeper into their own brainwash pit. Unfortunately that ship has sailed long ago. During his first administration this argument might have had some credibility to it but no longer. It's been a decade. They're lost. Like they are legit lost and gone. We have to sever connections to show that this is not normal. We have to show them that this insanity should not be normalized and doing things such as cutting off all contact with these nut jobs will provide a possibility of showing some folks the seriousness of this. To them they think it's politics and they don't understand why family would cut them off just because of politics. But it's not just politics anymore. It's literally infecting the daily lives of not only Americans but international societies as well. It is affecting human rights, it is oppressing people. The Germans in the 1930's let Nazis become normalized an... (0)

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

So clearly you cut the start of this argument. Why? And yes if I saw "Two same-s*x parents cannot typically have biological children. But what if two men could have a baby? What do you think the s*x of the child could be" I'd also be going like WTF is this r-slurred question(AND SO SHOULD YOU). What did you expect calling her homophobic. This isn't even about homophobia, it's a stupid fricking question to have in a BIOLOGY textbook! Wtf are you people teaching your kids in the USA. At first I thought republicans were just exaggerating rare cases but shit has become so muddy I don't think either side knows what's up or down. Every well known reddit thread has become a illogical Lib/Cons cesspool of politics ,propaganda and bots(or r-slurs IDK). No fricking wonder Trump won because Dems seem to be the more radical, illogical, brainwashed morons than the republicans usually are. You people need to seriously do a reality check on yourselves or face another 8 years of Republican dominance. ... (1)

Biggest Lolcow: /u/Lopsided_Purchase235

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autodrama: automating away the jobs of dramneurodivergents. Ping HeyMoon if there are any problems or you have a suggestion

Was sitting next to 3 college aged girls and some dude came up to them and mentioned that his daughter had just started going to college. They decided to guess his age and decided late 40s so he got mad at them, asking how in the world they thought he looked that old when he was 34. He then walked away leaving them dumbfounded. Literal !fellas

I've said repeatedly that the Sevesk front has been one of the most stable and dependable fronts in across Ukraine. Its health is a good indicator of the overall heath of the AFU. https://t.co/vXuTi2d41K

— ayden (@squatsons) February 24, 2025

Thоsе guу hеļd thís tеrrítоřу fоř 2 уеаrs thеу аřе thе bеst ukřаíníаn sоļdíеřs, guеs thеу gоt tíеřеd.

Thаt рļасе ís nоt thаt strаtеgíс, gоаļ ís just tо shоrtеn thе frоnt аnd gеt ríd оf Ukřаíníаn mоst еxреříеnсеd brígаdе.

🐞 #BeriArt @beribug.bsky.social

— thernz (@thernz.bsky.social) 2025-02-10T01:45:35.559Z

You guys are genuinely so fucking pathetic IT'S QUITE LITERALLY JUST VIDEO GAMES https://t.co/sfcujDv4Lu

— kazu°• (@kiikazuu) February 8, 2025

/r/law is one of the dumbest subreddits lol

the maymays said musk was gonna make genetically engineered catgirls why he makin the eggs cost more

DUI suspect caught speeding at over 130 mph said he was in rush to see his cat: cops https://t.co/bhFU83s7NV pic.twitter.com/XX2K3NJW73

— New York Post (@nypost) February 7, 2025

Most Based Comments

Basedness: 🔥🔥🔥🔘🔘

Immediate family? No. The only other sibling is his sister and she's 20-ish. She does baby sit in fairness to her. Widening net to cousins etc none stepped forward. They definitely are there on my wife's side at least. Not sure about his side. (1595)

What about the parents? (96)

Basedness: 🔥🔥🔥🔘🔘

I did that with another story the other day and I got the same thing 💀 Dead internet is looking really real rn (1294)

Are we the orphans of the dead internet? Who will care for us? (561)

Basedness: 🔥🔥🔘🔘🔘

NAH. It's a devastatingly sad situation but your wife is doing what's best for her and you're doing what's best for the children. I can't get my head round your wife saying no either BUT she's not an AH for it. Some people really don't want kids and that's their right. Unfortunately, you may have to choose between them. (323)

I'd have to chose my wife. I wouldnt consider her an AH either but I'm just very surprised and still disappointed.Edit: I don't see how I'm being downmarseyd. She's my wife. Weve been together since we were kids. I wouldnt be happy with it but the kids are not the only ones grieving. I made vows to my wife.  (-82)

Angriest Comments

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

This is the correct response. You have not been an butthole. it's a tragic situation that said, she is not wrong either.This will most likely end your marriage and it's a tough spot you have to choose. She made it clear upfront her view of her life. You agreed to that view. Your view changed hers didn't. So you either go back to the lines you both drew together or get ready to start drawing lines without her. She's not wrong or a bad person for this. If you choose her you have to do it under the pretense you can never resent her for this. Can you do that? If you chose the kids and your marriage ends, would you ever resent the kids? There is not an option here that is not going to leave you with massive "what if" questions. Only you can decide what's most important. You are not the butthole unless you resent your decision and others suffer for it. She's not the butthole cause she is just keeping her word about what her life view is. There's nothing wrong with that.Edit due to the 100+ r... (795)

While he's definitely not the butthole, she definitely is wrong. These children are her family, of course she has an obligation to take them in when this tragedy occurs. Modern society is all about "muh rights" but we've forgotten all about our duties and responsibilities.You have a duty to your family. Even if you aren't religious and view them as disposable, you should want to take them in simply for harm reduction. The harm and negative outcomes for older children going into foster care/state placement are demonstrable and horrible. They'll be (likely) split up. They'll be (likely) abused. They'll be far more likely to fall into addictions, crime, they'll have lower lifetime earnings, less stable homes of their own (if they even have families), etc. Every single metric is worse.It'd be one thing if they did not have the means to care for the children (although it'd have to be an extremely bad financial circumstance to make keeping them worse than abandoning them to whatever the st... (1)

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

Just because she doesn't want to do want you and op wants her to, doesn't make her a bad person. A bad person, is trying to force your beliefs onto others then, slandering them when they refuses. (1)

Um letting your dead sister's children fall into neglect and abuse in the foster system because you're too selfish to step up does make you a bad person. That's what being a bad person is. It's literally being so selfish that you make orphans homeless. This behavior and thought process should be shamed and ridiculed. It's the reason society sucks now, everyone only gives a shit about their own convenience and not about being a decent person. You will never convince me that being so far up your own butt that you refuse to care for those that have no one except you is a good thing. (-1)

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

ohhh i ws about to type sorry she would leave you if something happened to you as she lacks empathy and saw he said has standing her and Shes a good women. Mans got np clue hes married to someone with a personality disorder. Oh well i guess unless they end up im the system they are better of or maybe still would be cos that shits pathological and one day has going o look back and hate himself. took a twist tbh i was waiting to read he didn't want them. Its a shame people refuse to believe there are woman monsters too. Don't even feel bad for him those aren't red flags they are giant speakers screaming narcissistic personality disorder. if you red this mate, she might change her mind cos she will know she's crossed a big line but if she does yu need to educate yourself on Narcistic child abuse cos that that will happen and you'll need to educate yourself on you to not become complicit either by ignoring it or joining in, you have no idea what you live with in all Honesty nukes you c... (1)

Biggest Lolcow: /u/Level-Heart-5270

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Info about Bellatrix: Bellatrix is the third-brightest star and a candidate binary star in the constellation of Orion, positioned 5° west of the red supergiant Betelgeuse (Alpha Orionis). It has the Bayer designation γ Orionis, which is Latinized to Gamma Orionis. With a slightly variable magnitude of around 1.6, it is typically the 25th-brightest star in the night sky. According to parallax measurements by the Hipparcos spacecraft, Bellatrix is located at a distance of 250±10 light-years. And this pic is low quality but magnificent

🇩🇪🇩🇪🇩🇪 AfD! 🇩🇪🇩🇪🇩🇪

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) February 22, 2025