Watch this movie and then imagine it with a $20 million budget. It would be awesome.

I've recommended this show a few times in threads when people have asked for really good TV but my comments never got much traction. I'm hoping this does, because this show is a GREAT mix of sci-fi (which tried to remain "hard / grounded" in its execution) and Le Carre spy thriller. It stars JK SIMMONS, fresh off his Oscar win for Whiplash, and is really good. Only lasted two seasons but manages to wrap up the main story kind of like Carnivale (another show you MUST WATCH if you've never heard of it; HBO starring Nick Stahl)

This is peak 2000s cinema. Created by an upstanding teen youth group back when we were all 4. This will be known as a classic art movie from now until forever

!kino !zoomers

!chuds RETVRN

As a Kinophile, I've watched many movies out of sheer boredom. Here are my Top 10 Black movies of all time! If its not listed, then its not worth watching as a non-Black aka the average rdramacel. You can trust me! I'm a gook. I know movies and I know racism. My taste is refined so you can trust my taste!

Honorary Mentions: Not in my top 10 but movies I'd recommend you to at least watch once.

• Rush Hour - Jackie Chan carries this thus not on the list. Christ Tucker could be swapped out for literally any black comedian.

• Miles Morales Spooderman - I'm not even sure if this is actually a "black" movie, a lot of the themes in the series is more Latinx and incel-coded than Black American coded in my opinion.

• Shaft - Honestly thought about making this #10 as a shit-post entry but decided against it. Still a fun movie to watch.

• Brooklyn's Finest - Strong cast, under-rated movie.

• Sorry to Bother You - Its an interesting movie. Worth a watch.

• Barbershop series and Friday series - I've learned to much about Black Culture from this. And you can too!

#10 - Creed

I like Michael B. Jordan. He is the Wayne Brady of the 21st Century. Its a solid movie. 8/10

#9 - The Green Book

Its alright. Realized I don't actually like many Black movies. Black movie for white people. But this was good enough. 8/10

#8 - Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai

If only black gangsters acted like Ghost Dog. Then they wouldn't have been muscled out of the drug trade by the latinx and neo-nazis. 8/10

#7 - Coming to America

Funny movie. Funny man. 8/10

#6 - Get Out

Jordan Peele's ONLY good movie. Fight me. 8/10

#5 - BlacKKKlansman

Strong cast, above average script, lackluster camera-work. I give it an 8.5/10

#4 - Glory

Should be a mandatory movie to watch to be an American citizen. 8.5/10

#3 - Django Unchained

Strong cast, good script, fun camera-work, fun movie. 9/10

#2 - American Gangster

Strong cast, strong script, fun plot. 9/10

#1 - Bad Boys

Peak 90s. 10 outta 10

An indie movie ‘SUDDENLY’ fell apart after Jake Gyllenhaal showed erratic behavior, including:

• Stripping to his underwear & diving into the freezing ocean, saying “when I see the sea, I swim in the sea”
• Constant script rewrite demands
• Doing his rehearsal in a Pepe Le… pic.twitter.com/8DiOwC55kQ

— DiscussingFilm (@DiscussingFilm) January 31, 2024

It was when Gyllenhaal – who'd also signed on as producer for the $26m film – arrived in Iceland that things began to go awry. Technikart's report – which includes extensive quotes from Bidegain – describes some distinctly erratic behaviour from Gyllenhaal, including demands that the script be rewritten to a curious moment in which he stripped down to his underwear and jumped in the freezing cold sea in front of the whole crew.

The magazine even has a candid photograph, appearing to show Gyllenhaal wading into the icy waters. “When I see the sea, I swim in the sea,” the star reportedly said.

Other curious moments described in the feature include Gyllenhaal specifying what colour his hire car should be (“neither red nor white”), Gyllenhaal and Kirby reading the script aloud in mock French accents like Pepe Le Pew, and Gyllenhaal arguing that the script should be rewritten to make his character an ex-soldier.

“For a scene on a boat, [Gyllenhaal] sells us the idea that he slaps a fish,” one passage reads.

Eventually, matters came to a head on day four of the project, with Gyllenhaal still demanding changes to the script and even – allegedly – saying that the production's set builders had to sleep in their cars in order to prevent the spread of Covid. When producer Alain Attal dug his heels in and refused to change the script, the entire project fell apart.

https://filmstories.co.uk/news/suddenly-the-jake-gyllenhaal-movie-that-fell-apart-in-four-days

!tmz

Matthew Vaughan is some (((hollywood))) director who once made a good film. He then made a decent popular spy film called Kingsman which he followed up with 2 mostly bad sequels where he was huffing his own farts in the Kingsman Cinematic Universe TM.

Apple has now spent the GDP of a small nation to make a 4th KCU film and the results are quite funny

1. There is a hilarious looking CGI marsey in the film

2. Henry Caville is marketed as the lead but has literally 3 minutes of screen time and the nerds are mad

3. Reviews are literally terrible. The writer has 5 films on his resume and the dire Ice Age 6 is the best reviewed .

4. The entire marketing of the film is based around some mystery of who the title character is (it isn't the cat ). But turns out that when the film was announced they spoiled the whole plot in the press release https://x.com/DiscussingFilm/status/1412771411299647497 (it's actually the fat chick)

Tim Apple will be taking out his anger on his Chinese slaves tonight

Already nominated for Best Picture, American Fiction is a movie that I would highly recommend for dramatards. I will try to explain why in this relatively spoiler-free review (you can see all of the things I describe in the trailer).

American Fiction is based off a novel called Erasure, written by Percivel Everett in 2001 - a more hopeful time when racial tensions were nearing their lowest. The book itself is pretty genius, with an interesting meta-structure as it is about an author. The movie is a faithful adaptation of the book, centered around its great, immediately funny premise: an Ivy-educated black novelist gets fed up with the pandering shit that gets published, decides to write a fake book meant to be racist and play up black stereotypes, and that book becomes a hit. If this was the whole movie, it would probably be funny for 30 minutes and then run out of steam (see Ladyballers or any of the anti-woke conservative movies). What makes American Fiction so good is that it wraps in a emotional human story about grief, acceptance, and struggle into the comedy. It's a movie that is especially great because you can bring it up at work and annoy libs who will begrudgingly have to agree with it.

You know the movie is going to be good, when it starts off with the word BIPOC written on the whiteboard and a fat white college girl gets This is how we meet our hero, Thelonious "Monk" Ellison, a professor and struggling novelist. He's who shows up when you google "Uncle Tom." He's well-educated and comes from a well-off family of high achievers. Yet, he and his family still face many of the struggles of blackness - absent father figure, drug abuse, affairs, poor health, homophobia, etc. Most notable in the movie is his rivalry with another black author who he is about because she is successful in writing "black books" that read like your average rdrama rightoid post (we wuz kangs n shiet leshanda!) He feels that her books are trauma porn for white people and allow them to think of all blacks as these poor creatures with "powerful", "raw" stories, and also fake & gay since she herself went to a good college, landed some assistant publishing job, and is pretty well off.

The movie also ends in a way that I really loved, but to avoid spoiling too much, I'ma end it here. The only negatives of this movie are that sometimes, the jokes are a bit too predictable or on the nose. There's enough subtlety, so it doesn't get too repetitive, but I do feel that it doesn't need to hit you over the head with some of this stuff. For example, our main BIPOC goes "I don't think race is even real" and then a racist thing happens to him immediately. Another mild criticism is that the author/director really like to leave you to figure out what it all means & derive your own conclusions, but sometimes this feels like a copout where he's posing an obvious question, but not really adding insight by trying to answer it. Then again, comedy is more about and it mostly works so pretty mild criticism.

In summary,

This movie is a 9.5/10. It's weirdly like Get Out, but if the director and actors were actually smart. Go watch it. I've included a link to watch it at home, because what is more black than stealing. Watch it and let me know what you think below!

Also, (((they're))) onto us:

This is one of my favorite Goldblum movies and i wanted to share it with you guys.

Clip of Godzilla's first attack on Tokyo, from his first Movie - *Godzilla (1954).

70 years later and man, this still holds up. The music, lighting, cinematography, and miniature work portray the sense of dread, mortal danger and destruction.

Everyone should watch Godzilla (1954) at least once. There is an American adaptation called Godzilla, King of the Monsters! (1956) which spliced in scenes of Raymond Burr. Don't bother with that one. !kaijufans

My Evropean spirit has been awoken and I need Source if possible.

First trailer for #MonkeyMan

It’s starring and directed by Dev Patel. Jordan Peele is producing

In theaters April 5 pic.twitter.com/A8CFgRfa1T

— Culture Crave 🍿 (@CultureCrave) January 26, 2024

Folks be saying this is like sexy Indian dude John Wick.

David Byrne movie from the 80s featuring music from the Talking Heads, John Goodman, and general weirdness in the middle of Texas.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=w3QxN192Qgc&si=sdTPacfu-GNgfSwW&t=83

And I was promised a post apocalyptic world where I could roam freely with my telepathic dog bro searching for women to r*pe.

Where did it all go so wrong?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Boy_and_His_Dog_(1975_film)

@Spiderman

My latest surgery finally has almost completely closed my wound but I'm still here watching public access on the hospital tv. I never know what I'm going to get, but I know I'm going to inflict it on you dear dramanauts.

More effort was put into this poster than the movie.

This time I found what was possibly the worst of the countless low budget attempts to cash in off Star Wars in the late 1970s. You know how they used to make Spaghetti Westerns because Italy was so poor and cheap to shoot in? They also made truly awful sci-fi notable for goofy costumes and sound effects that would be more at home in a Hollywood children's serial of the 1930s. Instead of trying to give a detailed analysis I think it's better to just share my train of thought.

Don't ever say Star Trek TOS uniforms were goofy.

The Movie

• everyone is wearing goofy euro space uniforms that look like Buck Rogers shit from the 1930s

• people's mouths usually aren't seen while they talk because it's made to be dubbed

• lots of gesticulating and jumping and hugging, not sure if it's because they can't rely on dialogue or this is just what wops do

• there's a supercomputer called Wiz... But can we trust a computer?

• Captain Hamilton plays by his own set of rules and punches his superiors when he feels like it, hates computers, but we need him for this mission

• Some scientist woman has forgotten how to love and needs the greasy captain to teach her

• chica declares that he was so good she'll never go back to robotic s*x toys, Captain declares this his first victory over machines

• Enemy flying saucers whizz by with goofy theremin noises

• even the journos at the panicky press conference all wear identical jumpsuits for some reason

• Ship is damaged so there's lots of old time radio sound effects and cheap effects like the camera slowly spinning around

• there's an actual Nixie tube on the bridge, most high tech looking device in the movie

• Crash land on Planet Dark Stage. Not much happening

• Lots of blundering around in darkness until eventually someone finds a scary robot

• the robot is a red light shining through the front grill of a car or something, we know it's bad because scary music plays and everyone screams

• now this is a slasher movie as each tard gets bumped off one by one

• Captain got teleported to a cave more wandering around looking for the origin of the strange signals

• captured by blue people who speak through telepathy

• An ancient race that was overthrown by their own machines, nuclear war, every scifi trope that had been tired a generation earlier

• captain makes a deal with the Blue Man Group to defeat the monster haunting them

• captain goes back to the ship to get weapons, apparently destroys that scary robot from before?

• meanwhile on Earth... A scene happens for some reason

• Captain's ship's computer tells him to push a red button to kill the bad guy in the end

• There's some kind of attack on the ship? 90% of the screen is always dark so it's impossible to tell what's supposed to be going on

• there's a big bad robot with lots of bright colored light

• Various tired scifi tropes, he wants to build an army of super robots

• he brought the humans here to repair him by putting a few printed circuit boards into slots

• Captain fixes the robot but then throws a rock at his red button destroying him

• The whole planet is going to blow up, we need full power

• I think at some point Captain's gf was killed???

• the peepeeheads on Earth grovel and thank the Captain for saving them, say that humans really are better than machines

• one member of the Blue Man Group is rescued and coming back on their ship

• that evil robot they killed a long time ago has possessed a crew member, it's now jumping between them

• Blue Man gets in a fist fight with a crew member possessed by the villain

• the humans eject them both into space, think they've solved the problem

• Captain's baby has just been born???

• Captain asks the computer for an ETA home, it calls him an "Earthling" so he realizes it's possessed by the evil villain computer!!!

• FIN

Conclusions

Somehow they inflicted this movie on other poor countries around the world.

I'm not really doing justice to just how bad it is. Somehow it uses every formulaic scifi cliche and is still incomprehensible half the time. Most of the screen is completely dark all the time to hide how embarrassingly cheap everything is, but what you do see is still embarrassingly cheap. All I can say for the story is that it's humans vs. computers theme makes the ending of Mass Effect 3 look high brow.

My bro Captain Hamilton didn't even get a chance to pick a color in the end. I guess the synthetics were that jealous of his biological peepee.

Several of these shit movies were made by the same team and apparently they're public domain now, so maybe we could have one for an rDrama movie night. The goofy impoverished Eurotrash character of them is quite enchanting.

This movie was directed by "Al Bradley". No, that's the name on his birth certificate.

Jennifer Jason Leigh (game designer extraordinaire) creates a virtual reality video game. Featuring Jude Law as a newb g*mer, and Willem Defoe as a gas attendant whose name is Gas. Fricking Gas.

To play Leigh's exciting new game you fondle a kitty shaped controller.

You also need to drill a port in your spine to connect. These ports look exactly like buttholes. Cronenberg of course can't resist directing Law and Leigh to lasciviously finger each other's ports whenever possible.

This gaming equipment was the only good part of the movie because it was at least grotesquely interesting. The rest of it was a staggering painful blend of horrifically insipid acting, dialogue, and story.

Conclusion: the average dramacel will like this movie. I fricking hated it, which means drama will love it.

I think she might be the one