carp this'll be good, it's full of incredible retards
Digital Dating Environment
If you have been taken and/or have been touching grass recently, online dating apps are now the way that most people meet their partners. It's essentially taken what used to be a fairly time consuming process of meeting new people through mutual interests, and condensed it into a literal digital meat market. Most apps lie on a spectrum of how much they lean into this. If you're unfamiliar, or are currently dating and out of the loop, the main players are:
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Tinder - The original swipe app. You're shown a photo album, a brief bio (usually a joke), and you can say yes or no by swiping left or right
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Bumble - Bizarre feminist version of Tinder where women have to message first. Usually slightly better quality women, but they have to make the first move in a text and women are useless at this
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OKCupid - The OG dating site, now mostly full of Filipina women looking for green cards
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Hinge - The better dating app IMO. Premium allows for some pretty strict filters (education filter set to college or higher acts almost entirely like a fat filter, it's amazing). No swipe mechanic, you have to read a profile and like something specific about them, with a message attached if you want.
OKCupid used to run a pretty great blog back in the day before they got bought out by wokies. They used to run experiments on users and then publish the results. One of the more interesting ones was where they removed the bio of people's profiles at random, and saw what happened to their match rate.
](/images/16708785773157976.webp)
Absolutely fucking nothing
](/images/16708785272514682.webp)
](/images/16708785768394148.webp)
They also tried removing people's pictures and matching them at random to see if they'd connect. On average, people had much longer and deeper conversations (increases in number of messages and average message length). Most women will only message you back if you're much better looking than them, which is kind of unsurprising. You would too if you were getting a lot of attention. When you take that away, and even if you go on a blind date, they're generally pretty happy.
](/images/1670878708808731.webp)
Then they turned the lights back on and showed everyone who they'd been talking to, and more than half of them instantly unmatched the other. The conclusion they drew was that people (as a general population) are exactly as shallow as their dating apps will let them allow.
](/images/16708785769541185.webp)
There also used to be a separate score for looks and personality, which were pretty much an exact match.
The whole point of this is to illustrate what turns the gears of online dating: it's photos.
Photos only.
And only the first photo.
As a personal anecdote, this girl I was really into broke up with me and I took a bunch of stupid posey photos to revamp what was a profile full of just average pictures to try and sleep with someone hotter than her. I played with lighting and shot composition. Didn't lose any weight or gain any muscle (5'11" 163lbs for ref, relatively fit) or change my bio at all. I went from one irl date maybe every 3-6 months, to 6 in a week. It's fucking nuts how much of a difference it makes.
Redditors and Not Getting Laid
That last section should not come as any kind of surprise and if someone posts that, please tell them to rope.
It is, however, news to redditards. Despite general public opinion, Zoomers and Millenials are having significantly less sex than previous generations and that's a good thing. I am consistently amazed at what people will show as part of their public profiles, especially to people they're trying to sleep with.
Here's some highlights:
And some women for fun too:
They also can't fucking text if they ever even get a match:
You'll hear a lot of shit about women only going for the top 10-20% of men on dating apps. This is the primary reason - most men are shit candidates. They look like this, take bad photos, give creepy ass intros and replies, and then don't get laid, and are completely surprised how this could happen.
What does this mean for drama?
Aside from the fact that most of these people I've shown are dorks, they post feedback threads pretty regularly. Most of them end up being threads about how "Oh your photos are fine, online dating's just hard!". Or they'll tell people that all they need to do is reorder their profiles.
I call on you, hard-working dramanaut, give these people the feedback they actually need. I will find you the first few, and all you need is to give them some helpful life advice. This is your chance to reaaally get creative with it. Here are some bad examples:
| Instead of... (Real Reddit Comments!) | Say This: |
| [It’s your look. Hinge is more of a relationship oriented app. It’s not tinder. Be yourself but just understand that’s probably why you aren’t getting matches.](https://old.reddit.com/r/hingeapp/comments/zdnjkv/im_not_good_with_the_prompts_instead_of_the_about/iz5olco/) | Bitch, you're fat as fuck. No wonder you aren't getting matches. Lose some weight and try again |
| [Not sure why your post is getting downvotes, but just wanted to say I think your pictures are pretty good man](https://old.reddit.com/r/hingeapp/comments/zgfwtg/25m_hinge_profile_review/izhphd7/) | Did you lose a bet, or are you trying to stay a virgin? |
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Ladies, please feel free to bring your most gun free attire!
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looks amazing. I'd match
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I will never understand how these people spend so much time tweeking their profile, strategizing on reddit like fricking social media managers and conocting witty remarks, while looking like a fricking obese thumb with hair dressed like a hobo. If you stink, stop using a gallon of perfume and take a fricking shower.
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Besides that, doing stuff in the real world will result in far more success. I didn't care to drink at one point in life, so I largely relied on dating apps. It was gay. And not grindr gay. Then I realized beer is good and I started going to bars with friends. Then I started getting laid every other week. I once even told a foid she looked like Courtney Cox just to see if such an outdated line would work and also because I thought it was funny to be so blatant about referencing Courtney Cox to someone who was probably in her mid 40s in 2014. It worked very well.
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Getting laid by mid 40 year olds is cheating
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Also, she did not look like Courtney Cox.
Wasn't fat, though.
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There's a bar in every city where "cougars"
congregate and, if you're even remotely manly, you'll get molested before you make it to ordering a drink.
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this guy is fricking grannies
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Honestly thought I was hot but some of the moids in OP are actually cuter than me, I just like making foids giggle IRL and have deep voice and bulging crotch.
7/10maxxed dadbodIRLchad >>> picturemaxxed onlinecels
Glad I don’t use tinder or you strags would be laughing at me rn fr
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women with daddy issues are subconciously drawn towards dad bods
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I got the most matches using the art hoe copypasta.
"I'm so fricking horny for art hoes. I want to frick a coked-out tumblr hipster DIY aesthetic astrology thot in her lip gloss DSL mouth. I want to c*m all over a girl with thick frame glasses and edge dyed bobcat bangs. Everytime I hear a THICK, waist-high-jean-clad braindead choker-wearing slutty wiccan minx say "yikes", "y'all", "big mood", "cancelled" or "this is a bop", I get an uncontrollable urge to run up to her and fondle her d cups and sweaty fat thighs. I want to pour ropes onto her contoured cheeks and neotenous faces and rhinoplatisized nose. I want to finger an art hoe through her jean overalls while pretending to be interested as she talks about van gogh and arctic monkeys and how david foster wallace fans suck and gilles deleuze and VICE news and 'union pool' in williamsburg and steven universe and homeopathy and saveur magazine and taking adderall to pass exams. IM SO. Fricking. Horny"
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I wrote a variation of that once lol.
Im so fricking horny for karens. I want to frick a drunk-out her butt facebook GenX DIY aesthetic MLM girlboss thot in her hot pink Mary Kay mouth. I want to c*m all over a girl with thin ridged glasses and blonde colored bobcut bangs. Everytime I hear a THICK, waist-high-jean-clad braindead slutty Publix using minx say "I want speak to your manager" "You still take these coupons even though they're expired right" "lock your car doors we're in an urban neighborhood," or "Haha i should stop eating these donuts but im just SO BAD" I get an uncontrollable urge to run up to her and fondle her E cups and sweaty thighs. I want to pour ropes onto their false blushed cheeks and chubby faces and her clearly plastic surgeoned nose paid for by her ex husband. I want to finger a Karen thru her jeans while pretending to be interested while she talks about coupons and lifetime televison movie and how her kids never talk to her anymore and box wine and CNN news and 'girls night' at a fricking applebees and HGTV and essential oils and home living magazine and drinking so much wine she gets the bright idea to slash her ex husbands tires. IM SO. FRICKING.HORNY
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That's great and all, but I asked for my burger without cheese.
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Related from 2010: https://theblog.okcupid.com/the-big-lies-people-tell-in-online-dating-a9e3990d6ae2
Someone find the changes
Edit: Frick you lazy people, I'll do it myself.
Here's a copy of the original. They removed bits about numbers of s*x partners and a whole section about how "bisexuals" are either cute twinks/lesbos in denial, or just straggots trying to seem cool.
Edit 2: Which reminds me, if you're a straight moid on a dating website you'd have to be r-slurred to pretend to be bi: foids are super biphobic
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https://archive.vn/xeizW#selection-724.0-724.3
lmao they removed this paragraph:
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lmao ur whole post is inspired by an amusing graph? how juvenile
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Frick off
@bbbb we're having an important conversation here.
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The conversation is obviously not important to you, so frick off.
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Unplug yourself, b-word
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This is the 21st century, honey. Get with the times and learn how to use a computer.
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Just an ick factor, it's fine to be a straghag or makeout with other b-words for attention, but the thought of kissing a guy who's had peepee in his mouth is just plain nasty for most foids
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Oh so it's ok for her to kiss me after having a peepee in her mouth, but not when I do it?
I demand equality!
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I assumed it was a fear of getting some dude's shit particles in their c*nts.
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Maybe that's part of it
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MOHHRD
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BIPOCS
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Well it's percentiles so when the 1%ers are getting five messages a week...
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This is me btw
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No it's me you fricking roodypoo
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Women deserve 6'7
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Also this isn't untapped drama, what the frick you talking about r-slur
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I love seeing epic "blackpill" statistics from two years ago. Jannies, pin this NOW!
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He didn't even post the peer-reviewed studies
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i’m starting to doubt this post was made in good faith
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I should have noticed this earlier, but those height filter statistics are probably missing the proportion who use a filter. I mean, I believe that only 3% of women would explicitly include 5'1" guys in their height filter. But 97% consistently bothering to go to the filter settings? And it's under "Advanced Filters"? Too much computer literacy.
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Also filtering by 7" or taller is either experimentation or r-sluration. 25% of men in the US who are 7" or taller are in the NBA and the rest likely have horrendous physical problems.
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Look I know you are an r-slur so I will repeat this louder for you:
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My poiny is they only think that brcause they think a 6"2' man irl is 7"0'.
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lol probably yeah
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This is only a blackpill for ugly poor manlets though. We dont have any of those here
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im sexy btw
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Frick me and prove it
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It's picking up today of all days
The last couple of months it's been untapped
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Remember when everyone recognized that putting out personal ads was for losers and perverts?
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There has never been a majority of people who shared your ideals grandpa. You've always been a cantankerous loudmouth.
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I remember online dating used to be cringe and the domain of the socially r-slurred and otherwise pathological and then…
… society as a whole became cringe, socially r-slurred and otherwise pathological.
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True but early, early tinder was probably the most fun thing for a young guy to frick around on
Buddy of mine organized a literal harem date at a bar in 2011(ish?) and invited us to watch him try to navigate 10 women showing up in 15 minute intervals. Failed stupendously but it was one of the best shows I’ve ever witnessed.
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BIPOC
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The best part of hinge is you can send passive aggressive insults without their consent
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Wait how?
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The whole point of the app is you can send a message to anybody
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idk why I conflated hinge with bumble
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I did too. Now I'm wondering if I knew Hinge was a separate thing
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You can now do this on bumble too I think, they just added it
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It's amazing how lazy women are with their profile:
Basic: Dogs, The Office, Travel
One of the guys: Tacos, alcohol, sports
Boring: "Can make me laugh", "communication", thirst trap photos
Crazy: any politics, negatives in profile, "can't handle sarcasm"
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I saw one yesterday that said "All men are trash" and then "I'm attracted to red flags" because foids don't understand cause and effect
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Yea, strags are shallow (like gays), but stuck in a way more pretentious dance about it.
That 6'0'' -> 5'11'' is brutal followed by that 5'10''-> 5'9'' drop.
Luv me an effortpost, any effortpost. Good one bb
This, however, was a lie. Garden variety at best.
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Yeah honestly it's pretty brutal. No wonder everyone lies about their height. And thx bby
I thought I found >10 good tards for your viewing pleasure though, you can't tell me those pics aren't revolting
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I read it as:
and was expecting it as such. Needed to add another sentence doubling-down to not look like a total
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Cucked by the filter
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I'm taller than 6'4", so I don't lie about my height.
I remember seeing a few profiles that said 'No guys over 6'4"' though, so I understand heightism
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taller than 6'4 = genetic freak
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Suifuel, I'm 5'11'' but I'm going to start claiming I'm 6' I didn't know women considered me a manlet
. I am six feet tall anyway with boots on
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If ur a few inches taller than the girl anyway, most are terrible at guesstimating how tall you actually are.
Am 6’2” but I’ve said 6’5” and some girls believe it. As long as you don't project a hopeless lack of confidence, I believe you can convince her that you’re 6’ for long enough to get her to commit
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Or swallow
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zoz
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zle
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zozzle
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5'11'' in non-burger units is 180 cm (or 1.80 m), which is the tall cutoff basically everywhere where non-burger units are used, and 6 ft is 182 cm, therefore sweatym you're 2 centimeters shorter than I expected you would bem so you're a gigamanlet
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Thanks for the informative comment! I had no idea that my height would be such a disappointment to you. I'll try to make up for it by being an even bigger manlet in the future.
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Eh, I'm
and I did just fine by not being a redditor
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Are gays really that shallow? They some of the least picky people on earth.
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Different flavor of shallow, the lack of pickiness is in itself shallow, but also gays can be some of the most brutal on aesthetics.
This is in contrast to all the feigning about a myriad of things mattering, but it coming down to looks and economic security.
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They are, but they also aren't.
Like they start out incredibly picky but the longer the night goes on the less they care.
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he just like me fr fr
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ALLEZ LA REPUBLIQUE
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The "shallow" stuff is for the club gays who are all repulsive catty twinks you wouldn't want to hang out with anyway, they're basically women
Normal bro gays will frick absolutely anything. You're a fat nerd with a neckbeard and a pokemon t-shirt? Nah, you're a bear cub, now bite the pillow for me and we'll snuggle after
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The 5'11" thing isn't even a height cutoff, it's an r-slur cutoff
If you're too stupid to lie about 1 or 2 inch height difference when women don't even have 3D spatial awareness and have 0 understanding of what heights and measurements are, you don't deserve to breed
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Yeah height is the biggest scapegoat for getting no kitty. The lower limit for pulling average girls is probably 5’8. 6 foot+ really only matters when it comes to getting 9s or 10s. And even then, being rich arguably carries more weight
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I'm not giving advice to redditors. If they can't figure out online dating is a scam and they need to actually go outside their basements/cheeto-infested studio apartments to meet people outside to connect with them, it never even began for them
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I didn't mean give them advice, I meant go bully them by pointing out the obvious: that they're ugly spergs and need to be told as much
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I give tinder advice to redditors so they stay indoors and there's no chance of them interacting with a woman IRL
Just doing my part to keep m'ladies safe
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Online dating is great though. you just need to get good.
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No. Foids self esteem is too high. Just talk to them irl works out 10 times better.
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and live in a big city
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This is important
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Is that how you met your wife?
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No it's how I met yours
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Fiancé and yes
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gay
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Don't need to, already won
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If you are relying on women's consent you are a cuckold low-tier male
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Incels are the most based minority
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As long as all the women die out miserably right after all the providers are gone I am happy for it. South Korea already has this. Extreme feminists vs traditionalist moids so the moids are pretty much I am a rich boss I would rather die alone than frick my secretary is the b-word can't stop bitching about how hard foids have it in life.
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