welcome to the @TED_SIMP update
we’ve worked very hard on this for a very long time
it is the result of months and months of collaborative effort between dozens of team members
enjoy 🙏🏽
(if you don’t enjoy for some reason, u can buy Beano in the shop)
(this will just run for a few days don’t stress)
(though aevann made me a toggle to switch it on and off in the future at will)
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This site has reached its zenith. Nothing will come close to fart mode.
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I have had this site muted since I joined, what's going on?
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Bussiness.
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This shouldn't be possible.
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Holy crap sentient golden Marsey!
!blackjack1000
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!blackjack1000
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!blackjack500
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!blackjack500
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NEIGHBOR
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Golden brap! He sharted out glitter!
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HOLY FRICKING SHIT ITS A SIGN FROM THE FART GOD HINSELF !SLOTS 900
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OH FRICK ITS BEEN A WHILE !SLOTS900
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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
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HACKS
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!blackjack100
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!blackjack129
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!blackjack100
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!blackjack350
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!blackjack100
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!blackjack200
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!blackjack200
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!blackjack400
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!blackjack100
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!blackjack200
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BRAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPP
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!slots 250
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blackjack400!
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!blackjack400
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!blackjack400
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!blackjack400
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!blackjackmb2000
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!blackjackmb2000
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!slots100
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!blackjack500
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!blackjack1000
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!blackjack2000
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!blackjack4000
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!blackjack6098
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!blackjack500
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!slots1000
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!slots100
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!blackjack4000
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!blackjack100
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god i fricking hate this site
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nvm it's actually fricking hysterically funny now that i've had it for a few minutes
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I knew you'd warm up to it.
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IT’S NOT FUNNY YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE!!!!
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yay our flairs match again!!
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Poor Ted really became the butt of this joke
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he won’t leave me alone 😭
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Maybe it's like elementary school and this is just his way of saying he likes you
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i hope he dies
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babe you’re being rude
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Kiss! Kiss!
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DON’T CALL ME THAT YOU FREAK
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I’M ANGRY!! I’M ANGRY AT HIM
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That's not very nice, play nice with your boyfriend.
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this is a nightmare, i just want to post birds man
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maybe if you sic your birds of prey on him, he'll be torn to shreds. Tell me a birdfact, which kind of eagle or osprey will eat a carp in the most violent manner?
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osprey love fish, they would totally gut him
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Can I have 36 coins
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Some osprey are really cool and smart birds. I've interacted with some on the coast and they impressed me greatly.
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that's what i told her too lmao, carp got a thing for anorexics and he's mentally a child so it makes sense
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i hear wedding bells
oh no wait, its just the voices
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so far he’s one of the VERY FEW moids on this site to NOT creep on me so i’m REALLY hoping that’s not the case…
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oh he's just biding his time, waiting for the right moment to strike
you thinking he's harmless is part of his plan...
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Ah crap thanks for reminding me
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Wouldn't that be
@sandkwinn
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It's supposed to say fartbinn goddarn it
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No+keep yourself safe
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this really should be MarseyAssyMcGee tbh
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why are you so obsessed
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Yeah hasn't carp heard of HAES? Don't worry ted plus sized people are hecking valid!
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what
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the joke is that he only likes skinny women
Carp needs a chonker in his life
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do you think if i get fat he’ll leave me alone?
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Maybe if you get fit, you can beat him up and break his ribcage.
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good thing i know where he lives
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in a river, like the stupid fish he is.
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help me plan my revenge
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You can delete your account and start new!
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Based House Simpire user???
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no!
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farts will always be funny
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I am physiologically cursed in that I cannot burp, and as result of this I have the most prolific bussy trumpet probably of all dramatards and anyone I know. Thank you for making me feel at home.
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Have you ever shotgunned a beer? Did it push you like a jetpack burst?
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this is interesting. do you know why that happens?
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Lack any voluntary control to relax the upper esophageal sphincter, ifyouknowwhatimean
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Yeah sometimes I gotta shake'em up and make them a little flat or it'll be a pain. It's surprising how fast air can travel though the entire GI tract. Thankfully they're nearly odorless if I downed like a six pack or something on an empty stomach.
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This gave me a seizure, your lawsuit is in the mail.
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Braphogs valid as always
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oh it’s so stinky
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I just want to know how did you come up with this idea? Like, what
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It’s really high level I don’t think most people will be able to grasp the subtle layers of humor at play here
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God I wish that was me
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The dude, the wife or the fart?
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The wife or the fart 🥵
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you should be ashamed of yourself. does your mother know about the things you post?
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Admiggers are gay and stupid. It's really that simple.
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this is a result of him harrassing me on groomercord
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