surely he's successful enough to escape Egypt and live full time as a seedy forum owner now

Last night, I went over to my boyfriend's house. I was a little late just because I had to take a few attempts at finding a shirt and jeans that fit me right. When I was telling him this story I joked about it, I could see he wasn't amused and he tells me that me having to go what he called scavenger hunting for fitting clothes is a sign I'm getting fat.

I told him he needed to watch how he spoke to me. He just kept going, said that even the shirt and jeans that I had chosen to wear were snug-ish. When he saw I was angry, he pay his hands on my shoulders and tells me he loves me, but that he is not going to spend the summer watching me gain weight.

I told him he was just overreacting to a harmless joke. He told me I wasn't worried about my weight enough. I warned him and told him he was on thin ice. I've dated this guy for four years, since we were high school freshman, and now we're seniors, and never has he called me dumb, which is what he did after I told him he was on thin ice.

AITAH?

I had nothing fun to post

https://archive.is/Gux65

archive if ur poor

Chief Idiot Joe Rogan has blessed us with an interview with the dumbest gorilla r-slur yet, Terrence Howard!

Joe, who claims to have a great bullshit detector (https://old.reddit.com/r/DecodingTheGurus/comments/1cwhybt/joe_rogan_is_immune_to_bullshit_watch_til_the_end/?sort=controversial), lets Terrence babble off nonsense about frequencies and straight lines, never making a clear point or providing any evidence.

Here's a sample of some of the dumb shit he said.

1. 11=2. Why? Because he says he feels like it should and goes through implications like sqrt(2)^3 = 2sqrt(2) which for some reason shouldn't be that way.

2. Multiplication is broken because straight lines don't exist. Ok Terrence well nothing in the real world is 1 inch exactly either (although your tiny peepee comes close) so are numbers broken as well?

3. Statically charge balloons picking up dust disproves gravity.

This is clear evidence that only Jurnos should be allowed to have a platform. "New Media" morons like Joe have all the audience and none of the responsibility that CNN has. It seems even after Joe's earliest guest Hanpeepee was exposed as a crank in front of him Joe still doesn't get that he is a simian r-slur who has no idea what is real or fake. Now some idiot drama tards are going to say something like "oh are you implying that jornos are perfect?". HEY R-SLUR SHOW ME A JURNO THAT HAS A TRACK RECORD HALF AS BAD JOE ROGAIN!!!

Free thinking of the kind found on the internet is a belief that you know better than all the experts on a topic just because you drooled through a couple of podcasts. It is hubris and should be beaten out of the American population cultural revolution style.

Upmarsys to the left, thank you

this is going to turn me into the joker pic.twitter.com/BDz8FgWtV8

— and my name is alex (now on bsky) (@DudeExclamation) May 19, 2024

https://twitter.com/manuclearbomb/status/1426363490638483457

A big Simpsons thread from two years ago is getting new traction on Twitter as new generations realize the Sneed show was funny (rip Phil Hartman). However, zoomers are so used to musicals that reheat dead franchises with corny music that they fail to understand why Planet of the Apes: the Musical is funny.

Full clip:

Additional seethe (mostly 15 year olds asking where the shiny lights, references to modern movies, and Rick and Morty references are in a clip that is older than they are):

https://twitter.com/socialnomadrach/status/1791794323425800223

https://twitter.com/sonyplaytation/status/1792336067598881226

https://twitter.com/thegrayfruit/status/1791820189648003214

https://twitter.com/wiiiframe/status/1791918626767020186

I HATE EVERY APE I SEE

FROM CHIMPAN-A TO CHIMPANZEE

Let's check in on the song that the latest season of the Simpsons was advertising in an episode last week by the way, extreme coal warning: https://twitter.com/thesimpsons/status/1789816702869348687

EVERYONE IN HERE UPVOTE THE FRICK OUT OF EVERYBODY!

!dramatards !fellas !pinggrouplovers

"We are all fundamentally good. Yes, there are some rogues and sinners, but the heart itself is good," says Pope Francis. https://t.co/MmLPBhWVU2 pic.twitter.com/7Be2GrKrdB

— 60 Minutes (@60Minutes) May 19, 2024

Bro, has the Pope even met people?

Does the Pope not realize that what goodnees he sees was hard-fought-for by his own church, and only possible by the grace of Our Lord as mediated by the Holy Spirit?

Does he not know that this is the good news that the gospels are named after?

!christians discuss!

lots of generic condolences to inanimate object low tier jokes

Most controversial thread comes through still about being rational through hatred of somebody you despise, and how keeping cordial relationships even with douchebags is pivotal in international diplomacy

Lots of waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah wahhh wahhhh no the Iranian regime is le heckin evilllll, the EU head eurocuck dude should have said nothing and stay silent instead!!!!

and on and on

IT'S ABOUT SIGNALLING REEEEEEEEEEEE

This is the UK, pathetic. https://t.co/rfvogoJuGH pic.twitter.com/jQVZlZN5C3

— You know who I am (@TS0HG79_) May 19, 2024

Not your fault. Spiderman loves all of you.

Spiderman will return.