I’m obsessed with the Prison Hooch subreddit, where people make alcohol out of some of the most random ingredients possible. pic.twitter.com/YFdxON6En1

— Neil Goonman (@RaceplayShawty) November 5, 2023

This is easy for me. Coke and cookies. I actually gave up coke and all soft drinks a few years ago. One of the best changes I ever made.

I'm not a huge fan of chocolate, but I like products with chocolate in them.

Just the text: The general consensus is that the American dairy industry sucks so bad that if you want decent butter you have to import it from Ireland or New Zealand. I have no idea if this is actually true, as an American my palate has been destroyed by decades of eating flavor-blasted Cool Ranch Twinkies, but the certified professional karens on TheSpruce.com tell my wife to buy foreign commie hobbit butter, and "happy wife" etc, so we buy foreign commie hobbit butter. Initially I thought it was mildly interesting that our butter purchases might be supporting the IRA, not that I'm necessarily a diaspora republican, it just seemed interesting from an abstract political pespective, like "huh", but it turns out that Kerrygold was invented by a London Jew so probably not. Whatever, it's absolutely insane to import dairy from overseas, the 100% exact opposite of eating local fresh organic, surely Greta Thunberg's ovaries burn every time we scoop off a bit of transatlantic butter on our Thos. English Muffins, but the wife likes it, and she didn't complain too much about my latest investment in limited edition almost-vintage Nintendo Switch accessories, so it seems like an easy win.

Archive: https://warosu.org/ck/thread/19858167#p19858293

This is the future Republicans want pic.twitter.com/lRDrrPxh8N

— L 🐰 (@biocompound) November 1, 2023

Just moved it out of the infusing bucket after a month of marinating. It needs a few weeks to clarify, then 90 days of aging before it's going in a corny keg. It smells delicious.

This will take a bit of explanation. King Cobra JFS is an OG vlogger/streamer from Casper Wyoming. He is a noted neurodivergent, magic user, gothic bad boy, soap salesman, teeth not brusher, wand maker (magic wands), chi ball summoner, ventriloquist, computer duster enjoyer, alcoholic, s*x haver with OF AGE females, sicko hater, and food hacker.

Recently he has taken up the art of making prison hooch. Many speculate that this is because he figured out that he could use his EBT bucks to buy the ingredients to make alcohol even if he couldn't buy alcohol itself with them. But because King Cobra is classy, his plastic bottle homebrew efforts have turned towards the mead variety (read: he puts honey in his fruit juice swill as well). Mr. Cobra aka Cobes aka Josh has a notoriously bad taste palate which can be witnessed in any of his many cooking videos/food hacks; I personally don't believe he can taste anything but the strongest of flavors. This is likely due to a combination of his developmental disorders, autism, frequent smoking, alcoholism, and white trash upbringing. It's normally fine, even fascinating, but he has brought this into his mead making endeavors leading to a novel biological experiment that he's pretending is brewing. Keen eyed microbiology enjoyers will notice that he does basically 0 in the way of sanitation, because other microorganisms famously don't like eating sugars and organic matter.

The link above is a 17 minute video. I don't expect you to watch it, if you do I recommend using an extension that speeds up the silent parts. It can be summarized quite quickly. Here's his cutting edge mead recipe:

• Chocolate chip cookies, crumbled- very likely the pre-made cookie dough in the frozen isle variety

• 2 cups of sugar

• Entire container of honey (I think 1 cup of a local honey that probably costs more than everything else in this swill)

• Canned pickled jalapenos (also contains carrots and onions)

• 2 bananas, chopped/broken

• 32oz Monster Energy (he doesn't even use juice in this one)

• 1L water

• 1 packet of quick fermenting wine yeast

This unholy mixture is then manually mixed by shaking the frick out of the container and left to ferment to ideally turn some of this sludge into alcohol for a man pretending this is a hobby instead of an addiction without any pragmatic solutions. I believe it he intends to sample his variety of homemade meads tonight, on the spookiest night of all (I believe he's already drank some).

This was just preamble though. The real story begins now with a pregnant kiwi farmer who has decided for whatever reason to recreate this blend of sludge and perspective alcohol.

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/kingcobrajfs-josh-saunders.22713/post-17030131

TLDR, after many amateur brewing debates in the King Cobra thread, she has done the sneedful and recreated the concoction. To my eye, it looks about picture perfect to the original. And it has been left to brew. Just yesterday, the results were revealed!

https://kiwifarms.net/threads/kingcobrajfs-josh-saunders.22713/post-17071071

To the surprise of nobody, the results were less than margaritaville. However, we did have 2 wholesome moments I enjoyed:

1. She got her husband to try this horrific, spooky concoction (is there any more pure test of true love?)

My husband refused to drink it but I eventually convinced him to at least hold it in his mouth to taste it then spit it out immediately.

His only discription of the flavor was what he imagined "what someone elses bad breath would taste like". He also stated that he felt like it left a waxy coating in his mouth and he needed mouthwash immediately.

2. It was such a fricking toxic environment that it barely managed to ferment a bit

When I measured it now, the hydrometer showed that some sugar had indeed been converted to alcohol! A WHOPPING 1%!!!

Thats right, this abomination has 1% alcohol (and god knows what else). I have absolutly no doubt that there is some sort of fungal or bacterial growth also in this mixture. I strongly beleive this is due to the fatty and dairy content of the cookies and other junk he adds to his brews. The vinigar certainly didnt help.

It has been long (by long I mean since the brewing arc started a few months ago) assumed that King Cobra had been spiking his homemade abominations with actual alcohol so he wouldn't have to admit being a failure at doing something humans have been doing since thousands of years BC. This is due to his sub-optimal prep, his weird ingredient combinations, and his actually getting fricked up on them on stream. This seems to confirm that he somehow made some sludge even yeast couldn't stand.

I've given myself a marsify award so hopefully that will add enough emojis to make this entertaining. Goodnight toobs.

I totaled up the calories, sodium, and sugar content, estimating the sandwiches; 5340 calories, 4620mg of sodium, and 367g of sugar.

capybara burger & hashbrowns pic.twitter.com/qUvwJEz2MW

— /ᐠ - ˕ -マ (@lovesickdoe) October 29, 2023

I don't meal prep that often, maybe a couple times a month, but my rotation is getting kind of stale. 80% of time it ends up being some variation of chicken breast, vegetables, and rice. The macros are good and it's easy but I want to mix it up some.

My other go to is chili (gringo chili because I use ground beef and dried spices lol). The ratio of effort to quality and quantity of output is insane. With 15 minutes of active work and another half hour to an hour of simmer time I can make like 8 servings of good tasting chili.

Woman discovers dead frog in her spinach bag: ‘Traumatized’ https://t.co/5rElL1R7tK pic.twitter.com/unyHNQzp6o

— New York Post (@nypost) October 24, 2023

i'm trying to add more variety to my salads and i'm going to be lazy and ask for recommendations

no ranch or cheese or chicken please

my current rotation is:

iceberg(or spinach sometimes)/olives/tomatoes/peperoncini/sunflower seeds/italian dressing

spinach/tomatoes/pickled carrots/egg/pickled onions/pumpkin seeds/avocado/bacon bits/garlic vinaigrette

chopped cabbage/pumpkin seeds/olives/sweet onion dressing

i love pumpkin seeds

what are your favorite salads

Were actually surprisingly good. They're whole pieces of chicken, not ground, and the seasoning and sauce were decent. The one downside is they were crazy expensive, $7 for 5 nuggies, a small thing of fries, and a drink. I would get them again if they lowered the price.

TOTAL VICTORY pic.twitter.com/dYixHNlTSf

— joshua steinman (🇺🇸,🇺🇸) (@JoshuaSteinman) October 18, 2023

what are seed oils again?

A perpetual stew, also known as forever soup, hunter's pot[1][2] or hunter's stew, is a pot into which whatever foodstuffs one can find is placed and cooked. The pot is never or rarely emptied all the way, and ingredients and liquid are replenished as necessary.[1][3] Such foods can continue cooking for decades or longer, if properly maintained. The concept is often a common element in descriptions of medieval inns. Foods prepared in a perpetual stew have been described as being flavorful due to the manner in which the ingredients blend together.[4] Various ingredients can be used in a perpetual stew such as root vegetables, tubers (onion, carrot, garlic, parsnip, turnip, etc.), and various meats.[3]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perpetual_stew

I tried one of the world's oldest soups, a broth that's been kept simmering for 50 years by 3 generations of a family. It's now one of my favorite restaurants in Bangkok.

Bland as frick

not bad but also will never be in the mood for again. it grew on me more as i ate it. liked the naan. overall 5/10. mid. you guys hyped this up way too much. but perhaps going to a restaurant will be better

— shoe (@shoe0nhead) October 16, 2023

Cassoulet is a top-tier, deeply unhealthy cold-weather comfort food and I've adapted a more intensive version to my tastes and laziness. If you want to make the real deal then go with this one. It's worth spending two days on because you get at least 10 large servings out of it and it tastes great, plus most of the cook time is just waiting around.

Ingredients

Meats

• High-collagen pork cut with as much skin as you can find, e.g. shank or shoulder (I prefer it with bone so you can simmer it on day 1 for extra flavor ), cut into medium-sized stew pieces

• 1 small or 1/2 large package of high-quality kielbasa/silesian sausage (if you want to be more authentic but can't find toulouse sausages, they're just pork and garlic so any simple one is fine. Bong or italian/sicilian sausages will frick you up. if you do use non-smoked sausage then you should also add 1-2 ham hocks for smokiness; you could settle with bacon but it wouldn't taste nearly as good)

• 1-2 confit duck legs or leftover slow-roast duck (I usually make this with leftovers from this ridiculously good duck recipe)

• optional pancetta and/or ham hock

• a large amount of chicken, turkey, or duck stock (for this recipe, I'd recommend getting/making real stock but it's still good with boullion)

Vegetables/Legumes

• 2 medium-large onions (I used breton pink this time )

• 1 bulb garlic (you will use half in day 1 and half in day 2)

• 1 small can tomato paste

• 3 medium carrots

• 2 celery ribs

• 1 lb - 1 kg dried cannellini beans (you can use other white beans except for lima)

Herbs/Spices

• a few sprigs thyme

• a small handful parsley

• 2 bay leaves

• ~1 tbsp non-smoked paprika (non-authentic but I like it)

• copious salt and pepper

Other crap

• A small hard or hardish piece of white bread like a mini baguette, processed into crumbs on day 2 (you could also use panko breadcrumbs)

• Large dutch oven. If you don't have one then a casserole dish or oven-safe stock pot might work, but you'll need to keep an eye on it because idk how it'd change the cook time.

Steps

Day 1

1. Dice onions into small pieces, mince half of the garlic, and cut carrots into shreds (you could probably use a food processor for the carrots if you're lazy)

2. Brown pork on high temp in large stock pot (for oil I'd recommend duck or goose fat)

3. Once pork is sufficiently browned, remove, lower the temp, and add onions, carrots, garlic, and bay leaf to the pot

4. Stir the onions etc. to make sure that it's picking up all the brown shit from the pork. Once the onions look translucent, add tomato paste and cook for a couple mins, then paprika and cook for a few secs

5. Dump the pork back in and add stock along with thyme, parsley, whole celery, salt, and pepper

6. Simmer for about 1.5 hr or until the pork starts to become tender. Adjust the seasonings as needed- keep in mind that beans dilute flavor so you want it to be a little more salty and seasoningy than you'd prefer.

7. After the pork becomes tender, boil the beans in another pot for 5 mins, then drain and add the beans to the pot with the other stuff

8. Simmer until the beans are al dente, about 45 mins-1.5 hr for cannellinis

9. Let cool, remove bone if your cut had it, celery, bay leaf, and thyme sprigs, then dump your slop into a container and refrigerate until tomorrow

Day 2

1. Take the container out of the refrigerator and skim as much fat as you can off the top, reserving it for later

2. Process the other half of your garlic bulb into paste (if you don't want to use a food processor, you can do this by putting salt on a cutting board and finely mincing the garlic. You can also just finely mince the garlic, it'll still taste good) and add it into the container, stirring it all around to evenly distribute it

3. Rub down the dutch oven with duck or goose fat (a neutral oil is ok if you don't have it)

4. Pour half of the pre-cassoulet into the dutch oven, then pull duck into pieces and layer it on top

5. Add the rest of the pre-cassoulet on top of the duck.

6. The liquid in the cassoulet at this point should be at or just above the top layer of beans. If it's not, add some additional water or stock

7. Bake uncovered at 325°F for around 1.5 hr. If you had too much liquid at the start then you might need to cook it longer so the liquid simmers down. If you see a brown crust forming at the top while it cooks, open the oven and stir it into the cassoulet because that's what makes it really good.

8. While the cassoulet cooks, slice the sausage into rounds and brown the rounds on the stove.

9. After 1.5 hr or the liquid in the dutch oven descends to be at or just below the top layer of beans if you have too much liquid, take the dutch oven out, give the top layer of the cassoulet a stir, sink the sausage rounds into the cassoulet, and add bread crumbs to the top. Drizzle some of the fat you reserved on top of the bread crumbs (mine didn't have much fat this time so I used fat from the confit)

10. Lower the temp to 275°F and cook until the bread crumbs are deeply browned.

11. Enjoy!

no pics because it's literally just eggnog, it looks like this

https://rdrama.net/h/food/post/154043/aged-eggnog

it still tastes good but tbh i'm not sure the flavor has changed much since my original post

After

Spreading the dough ball into a flat circle is hard af, Italians have more patience than me. this is my third time making pizza and the dough still blew up like a ballon on one side but still it's real good

Only takes like 10min of work too if you buy the pizza dough at a grocery store plus 15 in the oven