Hewwo. Bwdige hree. I am just here two let u aww knoyw that twue luv is real. And it exists in the midst of a BPD stworm. There is jsut nyo other way two feww scuh stwong emowtions withwout siphwonying tehm fowm an extwemewy mentawwy iww wnech. Lkie iww two the pwoint wehre I actuawwy fwew lkie my lfie wuold be in dnager if I feww aselep awonud them withwout rsetwainying tehm fwirst.

Three is nyo experience mwore prue in my eyes. The hugner. I wnat my tires slahsed. I want knyvies thwown at me, I nyeed it aww.

And u knyow. I wonder why I am like tihs. Why dwo I nyeed my emwotions two be upepd two the extwemes two fwew tehm. It is like I hvae a bulit up a twowalrance fwor luv oowr the yeras. Fowr years I put off recwowory because the path bcak was swo wnog and experiencing aww of the pian aagin fowm the start was scuh a daunting tsak. But it is powssible. Anything is pwossible my fweinds. Aww u neyed two dwo is take the fwirst step, and spned hwours of ywour tim on nyiche internyet fworm wooking fwor the mowst mentawwy iww biofwoids u can fiwnd.

Sinecrewy,

A Bwidge in luv.

!attentionmaxxers !nooticers

I hwope u aww fiwnd luv as weww.

I had a dream last night where I had a boutique that sold shit like this and other super high end audio stuff and I had a super cute wife that worked there too and would sit on my face whenever I wanted. Then I woke up to my normal bullshit.

Subway just released a footlong Oreo cookie. pic.twitter.com/cPI17yULLH

— FearBuck (@FearedBuck) February 4, 2025

The tone is dark, even angry.

"The situation is getting worse every day."

"We don't see the goal. Our land is not here."

I wrote multiple times that Ukraine is holding Kursk territory in hope that they get to exchange it for something.

[IMG_3403.jpeg]

That what they roughly lost since they hold Kursk territory

[IMG_3404.jpeg]

Kursk territory is more zoomed as you see on marks and there is literally nothing there except Sudzha had 6k people so no more than 10k lived in territory.

Kursk oblast has 36/km2 people and 2200/km2 in Kursk

Donetsk oblast 160/km2 its most populous oblast in Ukraine (Kiev is not oblast tho)

And metallurgy wise Donbas is like super important to Ukraine

Russian now reached shevchenko that means just a bit push to north and this will happen:

Oleksandr Kalenkov, head of Ukraine's steelmakers' association, said the loss of the Pokrovsk mine, the only domestic source of coking coal, could cause steel production to slump.

"We could make up to 7.5 million metric tons of steel by the end of the year and, for next year, we saw an increase in production to over 10 million," Kalenkov told Reuters.

"But if we lose Pokrovsk, then ... we will fall to 2-3 million tons."

It's very big deal because during conflicts, since metal and coke is used to produce weapons so wiping out 70-80% of your enemy metal production is big deal

"We don't know where to get coal if Pokrovsk is seized," he told Reuters. "It is difficult to bring it in by importing; today it is not so easy to bring it in by sea."

Ukraine produced more than 4.3 million tons of rolled steel products in January-August 2024, of which 66% were exported. EU countries accounted for 72% of the volume exported, according to the steelmakers' union.

So as you see it becomes costlier to support Ukraine. Now not only EU won't buy cheap steel from Ukraine but they also will need to support Ukraine with steel so they could produce weapons and it will be a b-word to do.

And Ukraine got in such situation because they decided to send all their elites to Kursk. Probably to capture the nuclear power plant because Ukraine also has problem with electricity so losing coal is extra damage. They failed at it, logical move would been to pull back when it was clear they won't capture it. So when best Ukrainian units were banzaing in Kursk oblast. Pokrovsk front got wrecked.

Almost four months after Ukrainian troops launched a lightning offensive into the Russian region of Kursk, text messages from soldiers fighting there paint a dismal picture of a battle they don't properly understand and fear they might be losing.

They speak of dire weather conditions and a chronic lack of sleep caused by Russia's constant bombardment, which includes the use of terrifying, 3,000kg glide bombs.

The first week Ukraine lost tons of AD including multiple patriots. Around March Russian got new lancet drones that had more range than patriots so pulling AD close to the front line is easy way to lose it. So Ukrainian are in Russian territory literally without AD. So strategically Russia had no reason to rush pushing Ukrainian out. And that story about NK ended up being fake and only genius like @pizzashill believed in it. Reason for NK story was that west is running out of ammo and SK had tons of it so khohols politician who are clearly r-slurs and don't understand Asia thought story of NK would push SK supporting Ukraine but they recently closed all help to Ukraine and told them hard no.

@pizzashill here another shit you'll believe

They're also in retreat, with Russian forces gradually retaking territory.

"This trend will continue," Pavlo wrote on 26 November. "It's only a matter of time."

Legendary high moral.

Pavlo spoke of immense fatigue, the lack of rotation and the arrival of units, made up largely of middle-aged men, brought directly from other fronts with little or no time to rest in between.

To hear soldiers complain - about their commanding officers, orders and lack of equipment - is hardly unusual. It's what soldiers often do in difficult circumstances.

Ukraine now losing in every front including Kursk and they pulling men out of other front much more important than Kursk. To hold some field in Kursk.

Also important note, this year was very green (grassy) so Ukrainian used the forest to attack Kursk oblast but during wonder leaves falls so they can't really hide or build fortifications.

Some questioned whether one of the operation's initial goals - to divert Russian soldiers from Ukraine's eastern front - had worked.

It absolutely has, pull more Ukrainian soldiers from all other fronts

The orders now, they said, were to hang onto this small sliver of Russian territory until a new US president, with new policies, arrives in the White House at the end of January.

"The main task facing us is to hold the maximum territory until Trump's inauguration and the start of negotiations," Pavlo said. "In order to exchange it for something later. No-one knows what."

I'll comment about it later because it's just a bit to much of a

President Zelensky indicated that both sides had the change of US administration in mind.

"I am sure that he [Putin] wants to push us out by 20 January," he said.

You know the beautiful part about Zelensky he always says that Putin want to capture X by some date

Also he told about bakhmut and etc.

When we didn't got even a single time confirmed by Putin.

In an effort to help Ukraine thwart Russian counterattacks in Kursk, the US, UK and France have all permitted Kyiv to use long-range weapons on targets inside Russia.

It doesn't seem to have done much to lift spirits.

"No-one sits in a cold trench and prays for missiles," Pavlo said.

Wrong Redditors are praying from their desktop trench

In October alone, Russia was able to occupy an estimated 500 sq km of Ukrainian territory, the most it's taken since the early days of the full-scale invasion in 2022.

In November they took more

And high chances that December will be even more since 3 key cities are going gg

A recent report states that Russian forces seized the entirety of the Toretsk central mine and the three adjacent terykons. The Toretsk mine is one of two main Ukrainian strongholds in the city, with the other one being the rest of the city centre. pic.twitter.com/i6lXtR9TOM

— AMK Mapping 🇺🇦🇳🇿 (@AMK_Mapping_) December 3, 2024

Toretsk is as good as gone

Toretsk, Ukraine.

The plague of Russian fascism is coming. pic.twitter.com/sXw4BjUv1c

— Illia Ponomarenko 🇺🇦 (@IAPonomarenko) December 4, 2024

This is also a good proof since every time Ukraine is about to lose a city they crying about the city being destroyed

Russian already captured Komar so Novasylka now has no roads leading to that city (western road is also cut)

🇷🇺⚔️🇺🇦The situation of the Armed Forces of Ukraine is critical: The Russian army has taken Stari Terny and is squeezing pincers near Kurakhove!

▪️Ukrainian military analyst and propagandist B. Miroshnikov publishes another alarming report on the new successes of the RF Armed… pic.twitter.com/DnqEbBaYCx

— ⏳Towhee 🌏☮️ (@amborin) December 3, 2024

The fight in Kurakhove is now in the power plant so at the outskirts of the city.

And despite weeks of reports suggesting that as many as 10,000 North Korean troops have been sent to Kursk to join the Russian counter-offensive, the soldiers we've been in contact have yet to encounter them.

@pizzashill where are north Korean troops ?

🇬🇧🇺🇦🇷🇺‼️🚨 BREAKING: DAILY MAIL PUBLISHES FAKE ABOUT NORTH KOREANS!

I added the original picture. pic.twitter.com/uNDloeVBde

— Lord Bebo (@MyLordBebo) December 4, 2024

"I haven't seen or heard anything about Koreans, alive or dead," Vadym responded when we asked about the reports.

The Ukrainian military has released recordings which it says are intercepts of North Korean radio communications.

Soldiers said they had been told to capture at least one North Korean prisoner, preferably with documents.

They spoke of rewards - drones or extra leave - being offered to anyone who successfully captures a North Korean soldier.

They treating North Koreans like call of duty kill steaks

"It's very difficult to find a Korean in the dark Kursk forest," Pavlo noted sarcastically. "Especially if he's not here."

@pizzashill

Veterans of previous doomed operations see parallels in what's happening in Kursk.

From October 2023 until July this year, Ukrainian forces attempted to hold onto a tiny bridgehead at Krynky, on the left bank of the Dnipro River, some 25 miles (40km) upstream from the liberated city of Kherson.

The bridgehead, initially intended as a possible springboard for advances further into Russian-held territory in southern Ukraine, was eventually lost.

The operation was hugely costly. As many as 1,000 Ukrainian soldiers are thought to have been killed or gone missing.

The ironic part it was UK who planed this mission

🚤🇺🇦 Great Britain convinced Ukraine to start an operation on the left bank of Dnipro river in Krynky in 2023, — UP

❗️The maximum task was the departure of AFU to the border with Crimea. The minimum task was to expand the bridgehead on the left bank, cut the M-14 highway 5-7 km… pic.twitter.com/gvHnJFfi6y

— MAKS 24 🇺🇦👀 (@Maks_NAFO_FELLA) November 18, 2024

Military analysts insist that for all the hardship, the Kursk campaign continues to play an important role.

"It's the only area where we maintain the initiative," Serhiy Kuzan, of the Ukrainian Security and Cooperation Centre, told me.

They just at start of the article told Ukraine is losing ground in that direction and showed maps and this guy comes and says they have the initiative

And here comes the BEST PART

You see Zelenskyy assumes Trump will come on January 20 and the whole front will freeze. He thinks Putin doesn't see Zelenskyy goal. But the reality is Burger politician basically don't work in December and January and then work very half assed in February. From January 20 to January 27 Trump will be just partying and receiving calls from different world leaders, then he will need to appoint a date to talk with Putin and Zelenskyy. Even if we assume Putin wants to freeze the conflict it will take MONTHS. But Putin don't need it and he has tons of buttons to prolong it and one important button is, Zelensky need to become legal before Putin would talk to him and that's not what Zelensky would want to play because there is huge chances he loses the power. So whole plan of holding Kursk territory to exchange it for something is giga low iq.

Zelensky was also angry last week at western media for saying Ukraine lost 70k men

More than 100,000 soldiers have been charged under Ukraine's desertion laws since Russia invaded in

So Zelenskyy is still suggesting that Ukraine lost only 31k and most are civilians while at same time having over 100k deserters

Putin sees this, everything shows Ukraine is in shit. Wisest move would been if Zelensky told today hey we giving those full 5 oblast including parts that are under our control to Russia for peace deal.

And giga jfl and ISW homos who were always telling us if Ukraine loses something that it ain't important and soon Russian advances will lose tempo

4/ Russian advances through Hrodivka will likely slow as Russian forces begin to fight through the settlement's more urban areas, and Russian forces may struggle to maintain their current tempo of advance as they attempt to advance further west to Myrnohrad (just northeast of… pic.twitter.com/s7CpOuInst

— Institute for the Study of War (@TheStudyofWar) August 21, 2024

6/ ...although Russian forces may struggle to maintain their current offensive tempo into the future if Russian authorities conduct additional redeployments from reserve forces in Donetsk Oblast.

Russian Offensive Campaign Assessment, Sept. 13, 2024: https://t.co/SEKJTxxS1R pic.twitter.com/ydW78gWisn

— Institute for the Study of War (@TheStudyofWar) September 14, 2024

This how Redditors now coping while

This is the reality. But Zelenskyy needs nato but nato don't want Ukraine so nato is thinking about alternatives like making Ukraine like Germany during Cold War or bringing peace forces into Ukraine.

Those all are fantastic ideas but they are coming from homosexuals that planned the isolation of Russia and strategical defeat of Russia on battlefield.

So they don't realise Putin started it because he don't want Ukraine in nato or any nato soldiers in Ukraine. He survived the majority of EU hardware, giving Ukraine 600 Taurus won't do shit or Tamohawks

Russian even planning to cross dniper.

🇺🇦⚔️ Ukraine’s allies have shifted their focus from seeking a victory to trying to put Zelensky in the best position to counter Russian advances or negotiate a possible ceasefire, - Bloomberg

❗️The discussion includes the kind of security guarantees that would protect Ukraine,… pic.twitter.com/c9AtHbIemq

— MAKS 24 🇺🇦👀 (@Maks_NAFO_FELLA) December 4, 2024

This what homo that for 3 years been posting Ukraine is winning

And seems like Biden team r-sluration didn't stoped with 11 years of pardon to Hunter

They want to give Russian frozen assets to Ukraine that's literally stealing and giga low iq move. US is showing the world that its banks can't be trusted and they can change rules at will. But they ain't planning to do it they just want to sell bs to US citizens. They saying they giving that money as loan to Ukraine. In other words that's not Russian money, Biden team just gives Ukraine 50 billions as loan. Ukraine will never pay back and US citizens will be forced to pay Russian back.

This is also good example why mobilisation won't work. Ukraine doesn't have many young boys and statistics like this always try to paint a more favourable picture for Ukraine.

Also do you remember how happily you were when Ukrainian women were refugees telling how they bring young women and children ?

We got more Ukrainian 35-39 post wall roasties than 18-30 year old foids and if we count 30+ post wall roasties it will be multiple times more than all younger groups. And you know what those roasties bring ? Economical damage. An average or below average 35 year old Pier, Pedro, Peter can easily get foid his age. So we got more goods that was already offered more than it was demanded

!mensfootball

less than 24 hours after announcing he was aiming to be the Prime Minister of the UK to get “justice” for Pakistani grooming gang victims, Andrew Tate is threatening to sue a victim of the Pakistani grooming gangs because she was mean to him.

amazing. pic.twitter.com/alehcnibtz

— pagliacci the hated 🌝 (@Slatzism) January 7, 2025

Follow up to this and this

You can't deny how well he embodies British culture, innit.

Most Based Comments

Basedness: 🔥🔥🔥🔘🔘

I also dont get why they changed it with a pride/transflag. Where is the connection between doom and trans people? The doomslayer is just killing demons. Thats it. Nothing more, nothing less. (559)

The doom subreddit supports trans g*mersHope that clears things up  (-128)

Basedness: 🔥🔥🔘🔘🔘

Why would they feel the need to support that? Its unrelated to Doom and the fandom. (84)

Because they want to? What's wrong with that? (-37)

Basedness: 🔥🔥🔘🔘🔘

I support the legalization of marijuana. Doesnt mean i have to put weed on a sub thats not about weed (157)

I mean if it scare away the anti-weed crowd, it might be worth it. I remember wanting to buy a bunch of satanic stuff, so that door to door religious people would stop knocking at my door. But pretty sure the HOA would complain about that. (-49)

Angriest Comments

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

Honestly, I'm tired of arguing. I've said all that needed to be said. If you want to keep pretending that colors and shapes don't shape meaning or influence perception, that's on you. But you might want to think about how much those "scary colors" really don't matter, until they start influencing what everyone else thinks the space represents. Just remember, you can slap any flag on anything, but that doesn't mean it's neutral. May you find the truth within. (8)

Ask yourself, what is worse about Nazis, the shapes and colors of their emblems they use or the actions they take?The emblems are only seen as bad, because they represent the bad actions of bad peopleThe rainbows and LGBTQ flag is only bad if you believe it represents bad people doing bad things, and I simply don't believe that it represents bad people doing bad things.if you don't give a shit about shapes and color and look at things for the substantive and material impacts, then it becomes a lot easier to not lose your mind when a subreddit decides to change it's banner to scary colors you don't like.If gay people started seizing the majority political power and using to to create material harms that resulted in death, or human rights violations, that is an entirely separate issue than a t-shirt or subreddit banner simply having a rainbow (0)

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

This is a great example on why Trump won. These people have gotten so obnoxious, that the average normal person is fed up with this type of thing (41)

Crossdessers have existed since forever but no one really paid them much mind because they kind of just did their own thing. If you didn't hang out at gay bars, you might not have even known they existed. s these days go out of their way to make sure you know they exist in the most annoying way possible, and then they act like you're the crazy one when you're like "shut the frick up weirdo, everyone is tired of your shit." No one is trying to take their rights or oppress them or whatever the frick they think is going on. They just need to keep their gay and cringe shit to themselves instead of trying to force in on people. (11)

Angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

I really don't think they are the ones who made their identities political. (1)

Yeah no, it was "the enemy". And the enemy has to be fought and insulted, and the enemy is bigoted and kicks puppies. Any kind of evil action is allowed against "the enemy" because of the paradox of tolerance. The enemy wants to deny your existence. That's classic crybully rhetoric used all trough out history. (1)

Biggest Lolcow: /u/Agreeable-State9255

Score: 🐮🐮🐮🐮🐮(+1🐮)

Number of comments: 12

Average angriness: 🔘🔘🔘🔘🔘

Maximum angriness: 😡😡😡😡😡

Minimum angriness: 🔘🔘🔘🔘🔘

NEW: Subscribe to /h/miners to see untapped drama veins, ripe for mining!

autodrama: automating away the jobs of dramneurodivergents. Ping HeyMoon if there are any problems or you have a suggestion

Probably employs the same people you get from rent-a-drunk temp agencies.

Sadly, looks like we won't be getting any totes authentic grassroots kitty hat marches for the inauguration.

Protesters-for-hire firm sees dropoff in inquiries from Democratic groups 'dejected' after 2024 election loss

https://www.foxnews.com/media/protesters-hire-firm-dropoff-inquiries-democratic-groups-dejected-election-loss

I wonder how much it would cost to hire them to spam bardfinn with ywnbaw posting?

was trying to ignore this shit but

ENOUGH

https://isaveddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/1ip8e2w/a_british_man_tries_to_murder_a_man_who_was_burning_a_qu'ran_in_knightsbridge,_london

I like the brief moment of panic when she thought it was a fan who did it

There is no postmortem I forgot this happened and I just remembered

I think this was the last funny thing to happen on rDrama aside from the Marself on a Marshelf event

An example of the comics in question

its got that twee millenial comic style you all know and love.

The tumblr post announcing the depooning

https://mantimecomic.tumblr.com/post/772596812377980928/hello-all

I'll preface this post by saying that it's not a political statement. I have no agenda here other than telling my own story, and I have no ill-will towards anyone in this community.

I'm detransitioning. I have many reasons – Some related to my medical health, some to my mental and emotional health, and some to changing feelings about my identity. I won't go into too much detail here, as I like to keep my private life private.

I will share that the medical issues testosterone caused me had to do with reproductive system health, blood pressure and cholesterol, undiagnosed polycythemia, and mental health issues. I'm not a doctor, so I'm not in a position to make any medical statements.

However I feel that I have the obligation and the right to share my story about how testosterone was harmful to me. Because of these side effects, and the psychological trauma I experienced due to them, I began to reconsider how I feel about my identity and my body.

I came to the conclusion that I'm simply a masculine lesbian woman. Transition wasn't the right path for me. So I've reversed course and am becoming the person I feel I was meant to be all along. My feelings of gender dysphoria have been resolved. Through detransition, my medical and mental health issues have also for the most part resolved, and I'm feeling much happier and more optimistic for the future!

That's my truth. Your truth may be different, and I respect that. Please take a moment to think before you send hate messages. I'm not putting any hate out here and I'd appreciate it if you all would meet me with the same respect. And no, my account has not been hacked. I stopped posting new work here because of what I've been going through, and because it started to feel disingenuous when my mindset about my identity shifted.

My intentions with this post are to share my story and to reach out so that followers who are going through similar things know that they're not alone and there is support. If you're struggling, feel free to reach out in my DMs. I can connect you to support groups and try to help you find any resources you may need.

Thank you all for supporting my comic and for the years of good vibes! I'll make an update if I decide to start sharing work on a new account.

Signing off 🫡

Tumblrinas in shambles

--

some tumblr sneed

musculargarbageman said: great. just pls don't become a transphobic grifter who does misinformation interviews for right-wing newspapers about how The Evil Trans Agenda or sth pressured you into HRT and how nobody told you that T has side-effects. have a good cisgender life queen 👍

learningtofindmybrightside said: As long as you still stand beside trans people, then you should be able to do whatever you want with your body

They sound very happy for her.

What do commenters on 4tran4 have to say about it?

https://old.reddit.com/r/4tran4/comments/1ibdbax/jesus_frick_ok_this_might_be_my_13th_reason/

For context, it's this artist. One of my biggest inspirations for trans guy art in general, if even they aren't actually a man, who is? Will everyone else detransition? Why do I keep seeing this happen??

>if even they aren't actually a man, who is?

brb kms I'm gonna have to rep forever if even this guy can't make it

so close

What the heck

god fricking darn it can ftms stop fricking detransitioning PLEASE

They're ruining it for the rest of us 😡

Do eff tee ems detransition more than em tee effs?

Anecdotally, a metric shit ton more of ftms detransition. I couldn't name one mtf that has personally

they noootice

Terf in 3...2...1...

this is pretty much why i rep. what's the point of transitioning when so many of ftms end up inevitably detransitioning anyways. iwnbarm and all that

The point is to become a stealth ftChad who will never de

Much more sneed in the 4train thread anyway. Stay strong pooners!

!animalposters !cats

Here bro. pic.twitter.com/HxjpsjmCqC

— Embodiment of Intellectual Prowess (@baldassnugget) February 2, 2025

Somehow he thinks this is normal. Some tvs have smoothing on as default. He didn't even know what it was. Zoomers are so brain rotted they think a normal ps5 can run rd2 which has a draw distance of like half a mile at 60fps. This is some ceiling bird levels of not noticing.

I think noticing should be a mandatory class in high school. A full second input lag would entirely unplayable for someone with a brain.

Here are the runners rules:

https://www.rdrama.net/chat

!jannies pretty please can we get it streaming in chat? Capy said yes but didn't do it ily carp

In this history themed /h/marsey post, we'll take a tour through Egyptian history with the help of some relevant Capys. Cos Aevann's from Egypt geddit?

You gotta be an Egypt person to know Egypt. You can't just dabble in it. Most of my knowledge comes from this:

-- @Redactor0

This is very true lol so this post won't be anything more than a brief overview. The main point is that I thought it'd be fun to make some history themed Capys and use them to -ify Egyptian history. Hopefully someone gets a kick out of this.

People have lived within the boundaries of modern Egypt for at least a million years, with the earliest known cowtools dating back over 400,000 years and the earliest habitation sites around 100,000 years. Egypt served as something of a bridge for people crossing from Africa into Asia and vice versa, and many otherwise unrelated cultures would call part of it home throughout the long prehistoric period

Regarding the early history of Egypt, if not that of all mankind, it's important to note that the Sahara was not always a hot desert as it is now. The region is believed to go through wet and dry periods over time and was at least once an extension of central Africa's grasslands and savannas. Nomadic peoples of the Late Paleolithic and Mesolithic could easily spread across Egypt without the difficulty of desert nomadism and the lands supported many lifestyles. Some cultures lived as hunter-gatherers while others herded grazing animals. Many passed in and out of Egypt without settling

Several of Egypt's early agricultural cultures appeared along the Nile river and developed simple farming there. They lived on wild grains and endeavored to care for them, but did not necessarily plant the seeds in organized rows. The Qadan culture lived along the Nile for as long as 4,000 years and were notable for independently inventing sickles and grinding stones However, these cowtools disappear after the culture fell and the people were replaced by hunters and fishers. Something to glean from this ancient history is that in Egypt and perhaps other places, humanity did not necessarily progress linearly from hunter-gathering to agricultural city building. Different lifestyles "took turns" before the Agricultural Revolution truly set in.

(This was supposed to be something like "capymegalith" but grew to become sidebar worthy lol)

Other early cultures actually lived in what is now the desert, surviving off oases and river channels that no longer exist. One noteworthy site, Nabta Playa, was built around what was once a drainage basin as far back as 7500 BC. The area was inhabited into the 4th Millennium BC and gave rise to several stone structures, including what may have been one of the oldest archeoastronomical formations in the world as pictured above. Countless other megalithic structures to be found in the sand seas of the modern Sahara suggest how widespread fertile land in the region used to be.

Another relevant culture, the Harifian, are believed by some academics to have migrated out of Egypt and into the Levant where they merged with the Pre-Pottery Neolithic B culture. Some further believe they may have represented the original people to spread the Proto-Semitic language to the Middle East. Like the Indo-European languages, the Semitic family spread across a vast area and included East African and Canaanite languages alongside Egypt's modern tongue Arabic. Ancient Egyptian itself though is not Semitic in origin, a fact that further alludes to the variety of independent cultures that lived in the area.

The civilization we all know as ancient Egypt arguably owes its existence to the nature of the Sahara. As the desert grew and the surrounding lands became inhospitable, the peoples of Egypt were forced to either leave or retreat to the Nile and live as sedentary farmers. They built cities along the river valley, delta, and remaining oases and learned to use the river's seasonal flooding to water their crops. Sometimes referred to as the Proto-Dynastic or Dynasty Zero, this late Neolithic era birthed the modern Egyptian populace and identity. The people here spoke Egyptian, wrote in early hieroglyphics, worshipped the beginnings of Egypt's recognizable pantheon, and may have even practiced marsey veneration This is also the latest period where the Egyptians developed their beer making -- a five thousand year old beer brewery was discovered in 2021, and the scale of the operation suggests regular beer brewing was well established by then.

According to mythology, the lands of Egypt were divided between the Upper and Lower Nile before being unified by the mythical King Menes, now believed by some historians to have been the same person as Upper Egyptian King Narmer. The pictured dual crown of Upper and Lower Egypt would become a symbol of the Pharaohs from then on.

Egypt's unity lead to the Dynastic Period, a gulf of time stretching thirty-three Pharaonic dynasties from Egypt's Old Kingdom to the end of the Greek Ptolemaic.

Egypt's Old Kingdom is more or less what people often picture when they think of ancient Egypt This era saw the construction of many of Egypt's famous monuments including the pyramids of Giza and the Sphinx The tourism it spawned helps to keep the economy going even thousands of years later.

The Old Kingdom gradually declined into anarchy and decentralization, the First Intermediate Period. Unity was restored by the Middle Kingdom, lasting from c. 2050 BC to c. 1650 BC. Middle Kingdom Pharaohs built their pyramids out of mud bricks instead of masonry with casings of limestone, so few of these pyramids have survived into the present. Statues became more and more common in this time, with the block statue design remaining popular well into Greek times.

As the Middle Kingdom declined into the Second Intermediate Period, classical Egyptian records claim the land was conquered by the Hyksos, the word itself coming from the Egyptian term for outsiders. A Semetic speaking people from the Levant, they are traditionally credited with introducing the chariot to the Egyptian people.

Egypt's New Kingdom began under the Eighteenth Dynasty when the Hyksos were driven entirely from the land, lasting from c. 1550 BC to c. 1069 BC. This dynasty included several notable Pharaohs. Akhenaten was infamous for trying to do away with Egypt's pantheon and force the worship of a sun god Aten Some historians even credit him with establishing the oldest known monotheistic religion. His (probable) son Tutankhamun only lived to twenty years of age, but would retroactively become perhaps the most famous Pharaoh of all when his tomb was discovered in 1922. "King Tut's" tomb was unusually well preserved because the entrance had been buried and flooded over, whereas other Pharaonic tombs were robbed of their burial offerings long ago. On that note, New Kingdom Pharaohs didn't use pyramids as cemeteries and hid their tombs in sites like the Valley of Kings

Ramses II, also known as Ramses the Great and Ozymandias, conquered much of the Levant, fathered between 80-100 children, and lived to be over 90 He is famous for fighting the Anatolia based Hittite Empire at the Battle of Kadesh, the first recorded battle where extensive details of tactics and formations are known and also the largest chariot battle with thousands of the things deployed at once. Its aftermath also led to the first known peace treaty between nations, and a copy of it hangs today on the wall of the United Nations headquarters.

The Egyptian New Kingdom was subjected to the 12th century BC Bronze Age Collapse, an event caused completely and entirely by the Sea Peoples no really just ask Redactor As opposed to the Hittites or Mycenaeans, Egyptian civilization survived the period but came under the influence of foreign powers once more -- the Third Intermediate Period. Libyan rulers controlled much of the country through the Twenty-Third dynasty, and the Twenty-Fifth dynasty was ruled by Nubians

Nubia was a civilization in modern Sudan that was tied to Egypt's early history and influenced by Egyptian culture. From 754 to 656 BC the Nubian Kingdom of Kush ruled over Egypt as the "Black Pharaohs". They represent the kernel of truth at the center of Hotep ideology

The Kushites were driven out by the Neo-Assyrian Empire's conquest, and Assyria ruled Egypt until its own collapse. The Egyptians had about a hundred years of independence as a break before Persian conquest in 525 BC. Egypt rebelled against Persia in 404 BC but was finally subjugated in 343 BC. Nectanebo II has the distinction of being the very last native Pharaoh of Egypt, as his defeat led to a second period of Persian rule.

Achaemenid Persia controlled Egypt until it was seized by Alexander the Great in 332 BC Upon his death the short lived Macedonian Empire was split between his generals, and Ptolemy established a kingdom that would stand until the days of Augustus Caesar.

Ptolemaic Egypt, the "thirty-third" Dynasty, would also be the last. The Ptolemaic rulers respected the culture and religion of the Egyptians and had themselves seen as Pharaohs. Much art of them was produced in the Egyptian style.

But it's important to note they were Greeks ruling over a conquered people and kept all the important postings in Hellenic hands. The Ptolemaic monarchy produced Cleopatra VII (the famous one) and though there is much pop-history discussion about her racial heritage she was fundamentally Greek. In fact Cleopatra was the only Ptolemaic Pharaoh that ever bothered to even learn the Egyptian language.

In 205 BC, the Egyptian priest Horwennefer led a rebellion against the Ptolemies that wasn't defeated until 185 BC. The remains of a stele made to commemorate the Greek victory would eventually become the Rosetta Stone (But more on that later )

The last Pharaoh and another of the most famous, Cleopatra is most known for her involvement in Roman whatnot and her alliance with Mark Antony led to the conquest of Egypt in 30 BC by the army of his rival Octavian. Though not the first foreigners to rule Egypt, the Romans did not continue the ancient Pharaonic tradition and simply made Egypt into a province of their new empire.

All in all, Egypt's dynastic period is considered to have lasted from c. 3100 BC almost to the first millennium AD. The divisions of dynasties (originally thirty) come from the Aegyptaiaca, a history of Egypt written by the Ptolemaic era priest Manetho, and are still used by Egyptologists today. The last three dynasties were coined later in reference to the second Persian Satrapy, Alexander himself, and the Ptolemaic Greeks.

Egypt remained under Roman rule until the 7th century. It was a major breadbasket province for the empire and among the wealthiest and most populous. It also became one of Rome's first imperial provinces, those controlled by governors appointed by the Emperor rather than the Senate, and was notable for being ruled by an Equestrian governor. The Equestrians were the second of Rome's property based classes (the plebeians and patricians being hereditary classes) and ranked below the Senatorial. To prevent any influential Romans from using Egypt as a power base like Antony, Augustus Caesar allowed only Equestrians to hold the position because they were considered the "lowliest" of Rome's aristocracy. This made Praefectus Aegypti the highest rank an Equestrian could achieve in the early empire.

Christianity eventually spread to Egypt and took hold there until Islamic rule. Alexandria would become a Pentarchy city and also saw the Arian controversy, the first great schism within the Church that produced the breakaway sect of Arianism The tradition of Christian hermits and monasteries actually began in Egypt and spread to Europe from there. The Coptic language also developed during this period and would remain Egypt's common language until at least the 10th century AD. It produced the still extent Coptic Orthodox Church, based on the Coptic Rite rather than a Latin one.

From 618-628 AD Egypt was briefly ruled by Sasanian Persia before Eastern Roman control was reestablished. The near constant warfare at the time between Byzantium and Persia weakened both empires and enabled the very rapid conquests of the Arabian Rashidun Caliphate, the first ever of the great Muslim powers and the empire that ushered Egypt into the contemporary Islamic period. The conquest of Egypt from the Romans was complete by 642 and the lands of the Nile would remain under Arabian Caliphate rule as the centuries went by and as power transferred to the Umayyads, then the Abbasids. Muslim rule had the obvious effect of converting Egypt to Islam, though it was not until about the 9th century that it became more common than Coptic Christianity amongst the common populace.

Also by the 9th century, the power of the Abbasids had declined enough to allow further flung regions of the newly Islamic world to assert regional independence. Originally a Turk brought into Abbasid service as a Mamluk, Ahmad ibn Tulun was sent to Egypt as resident governor in 868 but quickly took advantage of the climate to assert independence and cease payment of tribute. The "Tulunid Emirate" represented the first period of Egyptian independence since the days of Cleopatra and would help to establish the idea of Egyptian nationalism in the face of a previously imperial Muslim world. It came to an end with the Abbasid reconquest in 905, but the Caliphate's direct power was still weak and Egypt was somewhat autonomous under their tributary Ikhshidid dynasty of Mamluk governors.

The next power to rule Egypt was the Fatimid Caliphate, an Isma'ili Shia polity that originally emerged from Tunisia. The Fatimids conquered Egypt in 969 and gradually made it their center of power. They were the ones to establish the modern city of Cairo, proudly setting it up as a proper capital complete with palaces for the Caliph and the official state mosque. One notable Fatimid Caliph was Abu Ali al-Mansur, famous for establishing centers of learning and concluding peace with the Byzantines, but infamous for destroying the Church of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem and helping to provoke the Crusades

Fatimid power was weakened by conflict with the Seljuk Turks and then the "Franks" (Crusaders) who would capture virtually all of Fatimid territory in the Levant. Crusader leaders like Baldwin of Jerusalem and Amalric of Jerusalem would invade Egypt proper from time to time, damaging the coast and threatening the river delta.

One prominent Muslim commander of the post Second Crusade, Saladin, rose to be the vizier of the Caliphate and used his power to abolish the Fatimids outright in 1171. He took the title of Sultan in 1174 as the founder of the new Ayyubid Dynasty.

Though not born in Egypt and remembered as a leader for the Arab world in general, Saladin is another figure that has retroactively become a symbol of Egyptian nationalism. He was the first to be called Sultan of Egypt and is at least perceived as being a more "Egyptian" leader than the previous Fatimids. Egyptians (Sunnis) also note that he returned the land to Sunni Islam and did away with Fatimid Shia influence.

If nothing else, Saladin made the Egyptian eagle as originally depicted in Pharaonic era symbolism into his personal emblem. The Eagle of Saladin would in turn inspire Egypt's modern coat of arms.

A longstanding tradition of Muslim powers was the usage of slave soldiers called Mamluks. Originally captives from the Turkic peoples of Central Asia, later recruited from a variety of foreign cultures, Mamluks were converted to Islam if not already and made to fight in the armies of the Abbasid Caliphate. The practice continued and evolved over the centuries, with many Mamluks becoming commanders and governors for their masters and establishing hereditary lineages of their own.

Many other post-Caliphate states continued the practice into the early modern period, the Turks themselves making use of Mamluks after converting to Islam and establishing their own states in the Middle East. The Ottomans continued the tradition through the well known Janissary corps, referenced by this very site no less.

The Mamluks of Egypt evolved into something of a knightly caste, and in the wake of the Seventh Crusade they overthrew the Ayyubids entirely and established the "Mamluk Sultanate". The Mamluks defended Egypt and reclaimed territory in the Levant from the Mongols, at one point representing the only major Islamic power in the Middle East to not fall under Mongol domination Alas the Mamluk form of government was somewhat unstable and their intial Bahri Dynasty would go through 25 Sultans in less than 150 years, with the subsequent Burji Dynasty turbulent as well. The Mamluks also had the unfortunate distinction of seeing Egypt through the Black Death. The plague may have killed as much as 40% of Egypt's population and became a recurring problem for the cities of the Nile over a 150 year period.

As Mamluk power declined, Egypt was conquered by the Ottoman Empire in 1517 and became the Eyalet of Egypt. Al-Mutawakkil III, last of the ceremonial Abbasid Caliphs (used to legitimize the rule of later Muslim rulers) was taken from Egypt to Turkey and anointed the Ottomans as the "Fourth Caliphate" from then on.

The conquest of the Mamluk Sultanate opened the way for further expansion in Africa and gave the Turks control of the holy cities of Mecca and Medina. Egypt itself became a breadbasket province once more and produced a disproportionate amount of the empire's food. It also served as Turkey's hub for the transportation of Yemeni coffee and goods from trade routes to India.

Egypt's fortunes waxed and waned with the rise of fall of Turkish power. By the late 18th century the European empires had become stronger in comparison, and Britain was well underway in establishing interests in the area and the lucrative trade route to India.

While still an officer for the French Republic, Napoleon led an invasion of Egypt in 1798 and defeated the initial Ottoman force sent to stop him. Britain took the opportunity to intervene and stranded the French army after sinking their fleet. Napoleon abandoned the troops in 1802 and the French surrended.

The French actually had the romantic study of Egyptian history as a secondary objective of theirs and Napoleon himself established the Institut d'Égypte in Cairo. On July 15th, 1799, French soldiers discovered the famous Rosetta Stone while working on the defenses of Fort Julien to the northwest of Rashid (Rosetta) The stone was handed over to the British after the surrender and was sent to the British museum in London. Its discovery led to the field of Egyptology as it is today.

The significance of the Rosetta Stone is that it contains the same message written in three scripts, Egyptian in Hieroglyphics, Egyptian in Demotic, and Ancient Greek. Because Greek was known, the stone allowed scholars to finally figure out how to decipher Hieroglyphics, which is why the earliest Egyptian records can be understood. Otherwise ancient Egypt would be as mysterious as the Indus Valley Civilization, a comparable early civilization whose script remains untranslatable.

Napoleon's invasion permanently destabilized Ottoman power and left a vacuum that would be filled by an Albanian regiment commander Muhammad Ali. Originally part of the force sent to fight the French, Muhammad Ali of Egypt became the dominant figure in Egypt and was recognized as viceroy to the Sultan in 1805. He conquered much of Sudan of his own accord and campaigned for Turkey in Arabia and Greece, but in 1831 he abandoned all pretenses of subservience and went to war with the Sultan. His armies defeated the Ottomans in the Levant and southern Anatolia and threatened Constantinople itself. In line with their post-Napoleonic belief in the "balance of power", European nations were alarmed at the potential collapse of the empire and intervened diplomatically. Muhammad Ali ultimately agreed to peace in exchange for autonomous hereditary rule over Egypt, and his descendants became the royal family that would be recognized until 1952.

And yes, that means modern Egypt's arguable founding father was Albanian

It was also in this period that Egypt began growing its famed cotton as a cash crop industry. The Suez Canal, financed by the French Compagnie de Suez and originally opened under their control, was completed in 1869.

As the 19th century continued, Egypt fell into debt towards Europe it couldn't repay. A European commission led by Britain and France took control of the treasury of Egypt and forgave the debt in return for taking national control of the canal and establishing a permanent military presence. Increased hostility with the locals and Egypt's independent army led to a joint Anglo-French invasion in 1882. From then on Egypt became a de facto British protectorate, such that they ruled over the Suez and began building the Cape to Cairo Railway.

Though until 1914 it was technically still an Ottoman province.

When the First World War broke out in '14, the British made their control of Egypt official by establishing the Sultanate of Egypt, a puppet government without any remaining pretenses of Ottoman influence. Turkey's entry into the conflict as a Central Power led to the Sinai and Palestine Campaigns in early 1915. Ottoman forces opened the theatre with an ambitious raid on the Suez itself, but British forces had broken this offensive by 1916 and soon advanced into Palestine. This long campaign would eventually take the Allies as far north as Aleppo before the unconditional Turkish surrender

Though the Egyptian Sultanate itself was officially neutral throughout the war, tens of thousands of locals were made to serve within the Egyptian Labour Corps and Egyptian Camel Transport Corps

Egyptian resentment to British interference had only grown stronger after the hardships of the war, leading to the nationalist revolution of 1919. The riots and mass demonstrations finally led to Britain's official declaration of independence for Egypt in 1922, the new government taking form as the Kingdom of Egypt. However, Britain held on to many rights including security of communications, defense of Egypt, control of Egyptian foreign policy as well as full control of Sudan and the Suez. The world still considered Egypt an extension of Britain going into the Second World War

Following Italy's entry into the conflict in 1940, an Italian invasion of Egypt was beaten back by the British Western Desert Force in Operation Compass, an extended raid successful enough to send Italian troops scrambling back into Libya. The arrival of German reinforcements and reorganization of Axis forces under the Afrika Korps allowed a renewed offensive into Egypt that would be countered by the first and second Battles of El Alamein -- battles that would go down among the great Allied victories of 1942 alongside Stalingrad and Midway. British forces then pushed on while American forces landed in Morocco, leading to the final defeat of all Axis forces in Africa in May of 1943 During the war Egypt remained officially neutral but provided significant material support to the British. Egyptian troops also defended themselves from occasional Axis attacks and would suffer over a thousand killed and wounded.

Meanwhile, Egypt's yearnings for true independence continued to grow. The Anglo-Egyptian treaty of 1936 promised an end to British military presence beyond the Suez except in cases of foreign invasion of Egypt. With that invasion having happened and ended, Egyptians in the post-war period became more fervent than ever in demanding British withdrawal. In '42 there had also been the infamous Abdeen Palace Incident in which British troops surrounded Egyptian King Farouk in his home and forced him to accept a Wafd controlled government -- the Wafd being a political party and the British believing such a government would be more cooperative for the war effort. Lest he end up overthrown by the British as had happened to Iraq and Iran in the same period, King Farouk capitulated. This incident was seen by the Egyptian people as a national embarrassment and stirred them against the monarchy and existing political parties

In '48 the Egyptian army attacked Israel alongside other Arab powers and were repulsed everywhere beyond the Gaza Strip though an officer named Gamal Abdel Nasser made a name for himself by holding out until the armistice. The stresses of this war inflamed the situation at home as disgruntled army officers began to collaborate against the Kingdom.

In 1951 Egypt withdrew from the '36 treaty and began a Suez incident by cutting off water to the British base and refusing to allow any Egyptian workers to travel there. Egyptian police were seen aiding guerillas and a police station was leveled by British attack. In '52 King Farouk was overthrown and forced to abdicate the throne by the Free Officers Movement, a conspiracy against the Kingdom led by Mohamed Naguib and Nasser. Becoming Egypt's second president in '54 after Naguib, Nasser pressured the British more heavily than before and in '56 he kicked off the Suez Crisis by nationalizing the Canal. Egypt was invaded by the militaries of Britain, France, and Israel but ultimately ended the crisis in control of the canal, still administered today by the Suez Canal Authority established under Nasser. For all these reasons 1952 is considered as the year Egypt gained its true independence, and Nasser is seen as another founding father for the country. (At least that was the impression I got from a boomer cab driver in NYC )

Nasser was seen as a hero to the Arab world after standing against western powers, and in 1958 he attempted to put Pan-Arab nationalism into practice by forming the United Arab Republic with Syria. The government lasted only until '61, but Egypt continued to officially refer to itself as the UAR until becoming the modern Arab Republic of Egypt in '71. Another highlight of Nasser's administration was the Six Day War, a third (but not the last) conflict with Israel

Nasser reigned until his death in 1970 and was succeeded as Egyptian President by Anwar Sadat. This marks the beginning of contemporary Egypt, which in this context is defined by boring modern politics I don't feel like talking about

And that's all for now Hopefully someone somewhere learned a thing or two, or maybe a dramatard will angrily correct something I got wrong. Either works for me

I might do more emote driven history tours if anyone's interested. Brazil might be next cos capybaras are from Brazil geddit? Would this be interesting? Should there be more emotes and less words? Lemme know