When it comes to comfort food, congee (or rice porridge) is one of my favourites. It used to be poorcel food when people didn't have enough rice, since cooking rice in a lot of water would make the end product appear a lot more filling to the poorcels Because of this it's considered a taboo to have it during the Lunar New Year because it's unlucky or something like that, however in modern times you'll find that the humble dish is often elevated with expensive ingredients like abalone, dried scallops and whatnot

Having said that it's still more common to find it paired with more common ingredients like shredded chicken, minced pork, sliced fish and century eggs because we're a bunch who might just want an affordable and yummy meal For the Chinese there are generally 2 types of congee or porridge, one would be the Teochew version that's basically just water in rice, and the other would be the Cantonese version that's silky and thick, and we will be focusing on the latter version because that's the one I like

While I'm aware of the fact that there are no winters in Singapore and it's hot as heck, it's still a popular dish here especially for breakfast. You'd see long queues and long waiting times at the popular outlets here everyday still, so I can only imagine and be envious of how nice a warm bowl of congee during a real winter

The recipe I'm using is for the plain version of it without meat or anything so it's up to your imagination what you want to pair it with. The usual salt and pepper seasoning would probably work with most types of meat that you'll just dunk in the pot when it's 10ish or so minutes before the congee is done cooking.

Ingredients are simple:

• Rice (any type is fine but Thai Jasmine rice probably works best IMO)

• Water (I use a 8:1 water to rice ratio because I like it thiccc but you can use more water if you prefer)

• Ginger

• Spring Onions

• Cilantro/Coriander Leaves

• Chicken Stock/Bouillon

I've not listed the amount you'd need because in cuisine we would usually just eyeball an amount that's required according to our preferences lol, but if you really need a visual guide here's the amount of aromatics/garnishes that I've prepared for a serving of 2-3 bowls of congee. Ignore the dried scallops because I don't know how accessible they are to get for westoids and they're expensive, but if you're able to source for it then go for it I guess (crush the dried scallops into smaller pieces, soak it for 10 minutes, use your hands to shred them even more before finally dunking them into the pot 10 minutes before the congee is done)

Steps:

1. The trick to getting your congee silky and thick is that the rice grains need to burst or something like that while cooked, so we will be soaking the rice in water first to get that effect. Rinse the rice 2-3 times first before soaking it in water for 3-4 hours (it probably doesn't need to be this long idk). Some of the recipes I've seen say that it's not necessary to soak the rice grains if you use the right type of rice, while others would instruct you to freeze the rice the night before. They might be right so you could try it if you're short on time but I'll be doing the trad way of soaking the rice so don't @ me if it turns out bad using the other methods

2. Once you're done soaking the rice, boil water that's 8 times the amount of rice you're gonna cook, but it's really up to you if you want to add more water later if you don't like it to be too thiccc Once it boils I'd toss a couple of chicken bouillon cubes and stir until it's dissolved. Canned chicken stock or powder would probably work too but bouillon cubes are just more convenient IMO. They look like this if you're confused:

3. Throw the rice in and stir for it for a bit like 10-20 seconds and then leave it to cook for approx. 25 or so minutes without touching what's in the pot because apparently that helps the rice not to stick to the pot or something like that

4. Once 25 or so minutes are up, whisk the rice in the pot for 2-3 minutes until you can see it getting thicker

5. The dish is technically done after you're done whisking but I like it really thick so I'd leave it to cook for another hour or so, but I would add in the ginger and any meat/fish/seafood accompaniments 10 minutes before the hour is up and stir it around for a bit, it's really a preference and time thing. This is the thickness of my congee at the end of it all:

6. Garnish it with spring onions and cilantro/coriander leaves and you're done! The yellow/golden things are dough fritters (Chinese churros I guess) which go perfect with congee and I personally love to spice it up by dousing a lot of pepper in it

It might look plain and boring but because the rice grains have burst they absorb the flavours of the other ingredients cooked along with it, which in this case would be the chicken bouillon and dried scallops, so it's a real burst of flavours happening when you take a mouthful of congee. Furthermore it's easier to digest than normal cooked rice so it's the dish you usually see asians serve to people recuperating from illnesses or something like that

!jannies please pin effortpost

Sorry for the ugly pic, what's important is the recipe.

Through years of experimentation I have created the ultimate (according to my tastes) red borscht recipe. If you've never had it, it's a slightly sweet beet soup that you can customize in endless ways, but it typically has meat or beans and cabbage. It's a good meal for any season, extremely cheap, very healthy, and beets are good for your liver, so you should try it. It takes around 2-3 hours to cook but most of that's just letting it simmer and occasionally adding crap to the pot.

Ingredients

1. 1-2.5 lb cartilaginous red meat, ideally with bone (A big skin-on pork shank is my ideal cut, braised pork skin tastes great and thickens the broth. Can sub meat for dark kidney or cannellini beans) - precut stew meat works but you're paying more for someone else to do something that takes a couple extra mins of work

2. 3 medium or 4 small red beets (generally the smaller the sweeter, and ones with stalks still attached tend to taste better)

3. 4 medium cloves garlic

4. 1 large onion or 2 small

5. 1 gigantic carrot, 2 regular grocery store carrots, or 3 farmer's market/upscale grocery carrots

6. 1 can tomato paste

7. dash of white or white wine vinegar (be careful)

8. small fistful of flat leaf parsley

9. 2 medium bay leaves or one large

10. liberal amount of marjoram to taste

11. about a tsp of mexican oregano to taste (optional)

12. about a tsp of paprika to taste

13. half a white cabbage

14. chicken stock, 2 chicken stock cubes, or water

15. black pepper and salt to taste

16. white sugar or 2 prunes (optional)

Serve with:

• sturdy bread like a baguette

• dill

• sour cream, smetana, cream cheese, etc.

Directions

1. Cut the onion in half and dice one half; set the other half aside

2. Mince garlic

3. If you bought a whole cut of meat, you can process it into pieces ahead of time or simmer it first, then pull it out if you're lazy. That'll increase cook time though

4. Heat up your largest stock pot on the stovetop at about medium heat (I usually let the fat from the cut render but if yours doesn't have a lot of exposed fat then add some oil. Lard highly recommended if you're using beef). Add the meat and stir around for a few mins.

5. Add onions and sweat for a couple mins, then add bay leaves and garlic and sweat for a couple more mins. Make sure not to brown anything, the mallard reaction ruins the clean flavor

6. Add tomato paste, stir around for a couple mins, then add paprika and stir for a few secs until the paprika smell diminishes. The timing for these first few steps isn't important due to the aforementioned mallard reaction note.

7. Add stock/water with bullion/water and a dash of vinegar along with marjoram, parsley, and oregano.

8. Simmer for at least an hour, though it'll take longer if you're removing the meat and cutting it into pieces during the cooking process (it took the shank in this round about 1.5 hrs). You want the meat to be somewhat pliable but not super soft yet so that the pieces don't dissolve into pulled pork

9. Meanwhile, peel beets and cut each of them into halves. Divide the halves and cut half into small, thin pieces or throw into food processer and cut the other half into rough cubes or matchsticks (you could do one or the other but having both makes the texture more interesting)

10. Throw the beets into the pot

12. About 30 mins after the beets have been added, taste the broth. If your beets are really shit then you can add sugar or prunes here to sweeten it . Otherwise adjust your salt, spices, vinegar, etc. if you need to

13. Meanwhile, cut carrots into matchsticks or shreds or throw into food processor and cut the reserved half of the onion once through the middle, then crosswise into thin slivers

14. Toss the carrots and onion into the pot after the beets have been in there for 40-60 mins

15. Dice the cabbage half into squares or cut in small thin slivers.

16. Add cabbage to pot after carrots and onion have been in there for about 15 mins

17. Cook soup for 10 more mins, adjust to taste again if you need to

18. Serve with dill (can sub parsley), sour cream or w/e, and bread

@chiobu was taunting me with delicious singaporean food while i was away from my kitchen, now that i'm home i made a bowl with his marsey on it + tried my hand at the recipe i've been thinking about for 2 weeks

original recipes: https://www.singaporeanmalaysianrecipes.com/bak-chor-mee-singaporean-noodles/#recipe https://www.singaporeanmalaysianrecipes.com/bak-chor-mee-singaporean-noodles/#recipe

my mayo version with subbed ingredients i could find here:

(most of the ingredients + marinating meats + soaking shrooms, u don't actually need 5 spice i got it out on autopilot)

120g flat egg noodles (dry), i used half wide, half thin

ground pork:

50g ground pork

2 tsp soy sauce

1/4 tsp white pepper

1 tsp cornstarch

1 tsp toasted sesame oil

sliced pork:

50g thinly sliced pork

1 tsp soy sauce

MSG MSG MSG

white pepper

broth:

pork stock from my freezer, ~1L (to make your own just boil bones and water)

1 bunch spring onions, use the butts

10 black peppercorns

1 star anise

2 tsp salt

MSG MSG MSG

2 tbsp dried spicy anchovies

shrooms:

30g dried shiitake

250 ml water

2 tbsp soya

1 tbsp fish sauce

1 tbsp chinese black vinegar

1 tsp sugar

toppings:

LARD

spam lmao

soya

chili oil (the fermented kind with peanuts :drool:)

shroom liquid

chinese black vinegar

broth

fish balls i made an undetermined time ago from my freezer

chopped spring onion

instructions

night b4:

soak shrooms in hot water, cover

day of:

meats: marinade the meats in separate bowls with the ingredients called for

stock: put everything from the broth category into a pot except the anchovies, cook for at least an hour, skimming if you notice blech on top. add anchovies, cook another 15 minutes, strain and keep stock hot

shrooms: put all the stuff from the shroom category in a pot, simmer for an hour or until the liquid has mostly absorbed, keep warm and keep extra shroom liquid

noodles: cook in boiling water silly

toppings and assembly: fry spam in lard cus you're a fat piece of shit, slice some shrooms, put fishcakes in your broth and cook them for a few minutes, put your meat in a skimmer in the broth and cook for ~1 minute (or until done to your liking) while stirring it around with your chopsticks so it cooks evenly, serve all of it over noodles along with however much vinegar/lard/chili oil/broth/shroom liquid that you like, add spring onions because vegetables means it's healthy

notes: would make fewer shrooms next time (maybe 15g) as my ratio was off, would figure out what pork i'm actually supposed to use (this actually a lie i would use spam 100% of the time because spam is the best), maybe use less fish sauce with the shrooms next time, i bet vinegar in the ground pork marinade would go hard

compared to the photos from the recipe i don't think i did too bad! < theirs mine>

overall 10/10 so glad i prepped extras so i can have it for a few days, no clue how people there stay while having this easily accessible, thank you chiobu for telling me about this!!!!

Back again as promised to flex on @pizzashill and @Poj's disgusting animal tier eating habits and bring you, rdrama, my favorite dish in my arsenal: my take on Steak au Poivre. This dish is ridiculously simple and mostly revolves around sauce and a bit of prep. This is truly impossible to frick up and is so good any thot who consumes this will want to consume your sauce as compensation.

Ingredients:

>Couple of shallots (or half an onion if shallots unavailable)

>About 12-16oz of white or baby bella mushrooms

>Garlic

>New york strip steak

>Heavy cream

>A bottle of decent cognac (will heavily recommend Courvoisier VS or VSOP, its subtle notes really come out on this) - im using pierre ferrand 1840 formula.

>Butter

>Salt, black pepper, cumin, coriander, dill weed.

I will not measure fricking anything here, just dont be r-slurred and use your eyeballs.

Prep:

Start by pouring yourself some cognac as you cook and prep because you're not a cute twink b-word.

Next, dice the mushrooms as finely as you can, get real choppy until they are as micro as you can get them. Same thing with the shallots, though in my case its half a white onion because my grocery store didnt have shallots in stock. Take your steaks and season with salt and pepper. Get some garlic pieces minced super fine or just be a chad like me and use a garlic press instead.

Cook:

Chef up those mushrooms over butter and let it really shrink down as it loses water and absorbs all that fat. Season with black pepper and cumin, especially cumin since it pairs well with the shrooms earthy and meaty flavor.

When theyre cooked, set them aside on a plate.

Next up is the steaks, (yes, real steaks @pizzashill, not frozen salisbury steaks) throw them on butter and cook as desired. I prefer rare, you can be a b-word if you want and go medium tho. Once done, set them aside to rest as you continue batching up that sauce.

In the same pan, throw in the onions and let em sweat for a bit. Sprinkle some salt on them and once they're almost done, add garlic and let that cook for like 45s to a min on medium heat. Throw in 2oz of cognac to deglaze the pan and let the onions soak it all up (1 to 3 mins, and you absolutely want to inhale the alcohol fumes to get drunk off them).

Once reduced, heavy cream goes in the pan with butter and the mushrooms. As the sauce reduces, add in black pepper, salt to taste, coriander (for a natural spicy sweetness), cumin and dill weed (dill weed truly shines here.

Throw in a splash of corn starch mixed with water and stir it in to help thicken up the sauce. Stir occasionally and give it time to thicken up/really have the flavors blend in (just keep tasting it once its simmering). Once the sauce is tasting like liquid heaven, cut the steak into strips as thick as desired and plate.

Pour a metric ton of sauce on that shit and enjoy (seriously, dont give a frick about looks, eat the sloppy mess its amazing). You can also plate it over rice or with a side of mashed potatoes to just have the sauce enrich that.

@MrsFrozenClaus, as the resident foid go make this and confirm to the rest of the site that this is in fact so good you'd suck my peepee if I had made it for you irl.

Seeing the recent posts by @pizzashill and @Poj showcasing their disgusting subhuman culinary experiences, I figured I'd make an anti-Pizzashill and contribute to the food hole by posting my own dinner (and lunch prep) for the night: @bartendercel's Pan-Asian Curry Rice. Recipe and pics below:

Sauce:

Make a batch of sauce to toss on everything at the end. The sauce I make is as follows:

1 tbsp oyster sauce

2.5 tbsp gochujang chili paste (the o foods one is great and cheap on amazon)

1.5 tbsp mirin

1-2 tsp soy sauce

Ginger paste and crushed garlic to taste

Coconut milk to reduce heat and add flavor

1 tbsp honey to sweeten

Splash of Sesame Oil to enrich it.

Optional: smoked paprika and cayenne pepper powder, chinese five spice (minimal amount) to taste. If you want this spicier, less or no coconut milk and use water to increase volume of sauce.

Prep:

Buy some presliced mushrooms and one large white onion. Dice the onion and then dice about 1kg of boneless chicken thighs (i know bone in is more flavor but I'm too lazy to deal with that shit rn). Additionally, if you dont forget like I did, you chop and toss in some spring onions towards the end of the cooking process. Season your chicken with salt, black pepper, smoked paprika, cumin, coriander, turmeric and fennel.

Cook:

Toss rice in the rice cooker and when you've got about 7-10 mins left, heat up the wok. When heated, throw in some peanut oil and swirl to season the wok. Cook the mushrooms first and season with a bit of cumin. Once thats mostly ready, throw in some lao gan ma chili oil and the diced onion. Season that with a bit of salt and some curry powder. Next, once those are done, throw in your diced chicken and stir occasionally to cook thoroughly on all sides.

Once the chicken is done or almost done, throw in the sauce (optional splash of sesame oil again)

then toss in the rice and stir to combine.

The rice will soak up the sauce and the juices from everything that cooked on the wok, making a delicious Curry Rice combining Korean Gochujang as the base, Thai Coconut Milk, Chinese Chili Oil and Indian Spices.

Super simple, tastes good, borderline impossible to frick up. Now @pizzashill go tell your foid to make this for you and not frick it up. Best part is that once you have gochujang, oyster sauce and spices the tubs last an eternity so you really just need chicken, onion and rice to make this, costing almost nothing for multiple meals.

> be me, vacuum chamber enthusiast

> get a bunch of McD's burgers, big brain time

> vacuum seal those bad boys, air = enemy

> fast forward, craving hits

> whip out sous vide machine, it's science time

> gently thaw burgers in warm water bath

> feels like a chef, minus the hat

> perfect thaw, no microwave massacre

> burgers still juicy, flavor level 100

> saved time and cash, McD's trip avoided

> sitting back, enjoying gourmet fast food

> mfw I've hacked the fast-food system

Cassoulet is a top-tier, deeply unhealthy cold-weather comfort food and I've adapted a more intensive version to my tastes and laziness. If you want to make the real deal then go with this one. It's worth spending two days on because you get at least 10 large servings out of it and it tastes great, plus most of the cook time is just waiting around.

Ingredients

Meats

• High-collagen pork cut with as much skin as you can find, e.g. shank or shoulder (I prefer it with bone so you can simmer it on day 1 for extra flavor ), cut into medium-sized stew pieces

• 1 small or 1/2 large package of high-quality kielbasa/silesian sausage (if you want to be more authentic but can't find toulouse sausages, they're just pork and garlic so any simple one is fine. Bong or italian/sicilian sausages will frick you up. if you do use non-smoked sausage then you should also add 1-2 ham hocks for smokiness; you could settle with bacon but it wouldn't taste nearly as good)

• 1-2 confit duck legs or leftover slow-roast duck (I usually make this with leftovers from this ridiculously good duck recipe)

• optional pancetta and/or ham hock

• a large amount of chicken, turkey, or duck stock (for this recipe, I'd recommend getting/making real stock but it's still good with boullion)

Vegetables/Legumes

• 2 medium-large onions (I used breton pink this time )

• 1 bulb garlic (you will use half in day 1 and half in day 2)

• 1 small can tomato paste

• 3 medium carrots

• 2 celery ribs

• 1 lb - 1 kg dried cannellini beans (you can use other white beans except for lima)

Herbs/Spices

• a few sprigs thyme

• a small handful parsley

• 2 bay leaves

• ~1 tbsp non-smoked paprika (non-authentic but I like it)

• copious salt and pepper

Other crap

• A small hard or hardish piece of white bread like a mini baguette, processed into crumbs on day 2 (you could also use panko breadcrumbs)

• Large dutch oven. If you don't have one then a casserole dish or oven-safe stock pot might work, but you'll need to keep an eye on it because idk how it'd change the cook time.

Steps

Day 1

1. Dice onions into small pieces, mince half of the garlic, and cut carrots into shreds (you could probably use a food processor for the carrots if you're lazy)

2. Brown pork on high temp in large stock pot (for oil I'd recommend duck or goose fat)

3. Once pork is sufficiently browned, remove, lower the temp, and add onions, carrots, garlic, and bay leaf to the pot

4. Stir the onions etc. to make sure that it's picking up all the brown shit from the pork. Once the onions look translucent, add tomato paste and cook for a couple mins, then paprika and cook for a few secs

5. Dump the pork back in and add stock along with thyme, parsley, whole celery, salt, and pepper

6. Simmer for about 1.5 hr or until the pork starts to become tender. Adjust the seasonings as needed- keep in mind that beans dilute flavor so you want it to be a little more salty and seasoningy than you'd prefer.

7. After the pork becomes tender, boil the beans in another pot for 5 mins, then drain and add the beans to the pot with the other stuff

8. Simmer until the beans are al dente, about 45 mins-1.5 hr for cannellinis

9. Let cool, remove bone if your cut had it, celery, bay leaf, and thyme sprigs, then dump your slop into a container and refrigerate until tomorrow

Day 2

1. Take the container out of the refrigerator and skim as much fat as you can off the top, reserving it for later

2. Process the other half of your garlic bulb into paste (if you don't want to use a food processor, you can do this by putting salt on a cutting board and finely mincing the garlic. You can also just finely mince the garlic, it'll still taste good) and add it into the container, stirring it all around to evenly distribute it

3. Rub down the dutch oven with duck or goose fat (a neutral oil is ok if you don't have it)

4. Pour half of the pre-cassoulet into the dutch oven, then pull duck into pieces and layer it on top

5. Add the rest of the pre-cassoulet on top of the duck.

6. The liquid in the cassoulet at this point should be at or just above the top layer of beans. If it's not, add some additional water or stock

7. Bake uncovered at 325°F for around 1.5 hr. If you had too much liquid at the start then you might need to cook it longer so the liquid simmers down. If you see a brown crust forming at the top while it cooks, open the oven and stir it into the cassoulet because that's what makes it really good.

8. While the cassoulet cooks, slice the sausage into rounds and brown the rounds on the stove.

9. After 1.5 hr or the liquid in the dutch oven descends to be at or just below the top layer of beans if you have too much liquid, take the dutch oven out, give the top layer of the cassoulet a stir, sink the sausage rounds into the cassoulet, and add bread crumbs to the top. Drizzle some of the fat you reserved on top of the bread crumbs (mine didn't have much fat this time so I used fat from the confit)

10. Lower the temp to 275°F and cook until the bread crumbs are deeply browned.

11. Enjoy!

I got lucky with sourdough and have never had a failure with this recipe for the starter https://www.bostongirlbakes.com/how-to-make-sourdough-starter-from-scratch/#h-ingredients-and-equipment-needed and this recipe for the actual bread https://heartbeetkitchen.com/rye-sourdough-bread-recipe/#recipe

I want a good go-to regular bread though, I've tried a lot and had some success but none that especially stood out, pls post if you have any

Other recipes:

This is my favourite brioche, very forgiving recipe https://old.reddit.com/r/food/comments/eenrxt/homemade_brioche_hamburger_buns/fbvn2g1/?context=8&sort=controversial

This is a great pizza dough but I found it a little salty when measuring by weight, I'd maybe split the difference between the volumetric and measured weight https://www.seriouseats.com/jim-laheys-no-knead-pizza-dough-recipe

Hello !boozers

Here's a very basic old fashioned recipe. If your reaction is "this is literally a basic old fashion" - you are correct.

During my experimentation these are the core ingredients and steps required to make a good Old Fashioned.

By following these steps to a T I believe you will end up with a better old fashion than most bars.

Ingredients

1.) Whiskey Glass - Having a basic "rocks" glass is a decent idea, it's more trendy to have "tulip" style but a "rocks" glass is the traditional choice.

2.) Ice Mold - I have found ice molds are totally worth it. The interplay of the ice and spirit is key in an Old Fashion and the molds let the ice melt at a slower, more consistent rate.

3.) Metal Toothpick - Very nice to work with vs wood or whatever. Cleans easy, cheap and looks way better.

4.) Measuring Device - I am personally using a small jigger, knowing how much your measuring device holds is essential.

5.) Peeler / Good knife skills - We'll use this to get the top of the rind of the orange.

6.) Fresh Orange - We will be using the oils in the skin.

7.) Bitters - A bottle of proper Angostura Bitters will last you forever, this is what we'll be using in this recipe.

8.) Luxardo Cherries - These SoBs are expensive but 100% worth it. You should need to use one or two per drink so they do last.

9.) Simple Syrup - Simple Syrup is literally sugar water. Very old recipes would call for sugar cubes and grinding them into the drink but this is silly. You can make this yourself buy boiling 1 part water and then adding 1 part sugar (i.e. 1 cup sugar to 1 cup boiling water). Put it in a recycled bottle and top with vodka to store for months.

10.) Spirit - I will be using Bourbon Whiskey but you can be pretty creative with this. I basically recommend any aged base spirit (Whiskey, Bourbon, Rye Whiskey, Scotch Whisky, Brandy, Aged Rum, Cognac, etc). The sweetness of your spirit is what you'll use to gauge the syrup amount.

Steps

1.) Add ice to your glass.

2.) Measure 90ml of your spirit. A usual pour is 60ml but rocks drinks are conventionally 1.5x.

3.) Add a splash of simple syrup. this ranges from 10ml-20ml, depending on your spirits sweetness. I usually do 15ml on unfamiliar bottles and then adjust from there.

4.) Add three dashes of bitters. Stir.

5.) Stab your cherry and fight with it until you make it in the glass

6.) Cut off a very thin slice of only the top of the orange rind. That's where all the orange oil is.

7.) Fold the rind just-so above your drink so, if you look closely you'll see the oil spray across the glass. I can get a solid two spritzes out of a cut. Drop it into the drink after.

8.) Enjoy!

It's said that Mao's son was napalm bombed by the Americans who saw the cooking fire from him cooking egg fried rice

Hence posting about egg fried rice around the son's birthday in October 24th or around the date of his death on November 25th might get you into trouble

Found out that the ultimate egg fried rice chef in China got cancelled because of this

Good fried rice battle scene from a Thai cooking movie

Egg fried rice protests are a form of internet protest used by Chinese internet users against the government, occurring yearly around October 24, the birthday of Mao Anying, son of Mao Zedong, or around November 25, the date of his death. Posting recipes for egg fried rice is done as a subtle jab at the death of Anying during the Korean War; such posts are usually blocked or taken down by Chinese officials and can lead to sanctions against those involved.^[1]^

Background

Mao Anying worked on the staff of General Peng Dehuai in northeastern Korea during the Korean War. On the morning of November 25, 1950, he had overslept. According to some accounts, once awake, he stole eggs from the general's supplies and was cooking breakfast for himself despite orders that staff were only to cook at night for fear of American air raids. As he was making a pan of egg fried rice, he is said to have perished in a napalm attack by American forces on the area, who were drawn to the cooking fire.^[1]^

While some doubt the story's authenticity,^[1]^ internet users have taken to posting egg fried rice recipes yearly during October or November as a form of protest against the Chinese government.^[2]^

Consequences

In October 2020, food blogger Wang Gang posted an egg fried rice recipe and was widely denounced by officials and forced to post an apology.^[1]^ He was accused of using the video post as a "malicious political innuendo" insulting to Mao's legacy.^[3]^

On October 23, 2021, a regional branch of the China Unicom company posted a fried rice recipe and had their account on Weibo suspended, and all replies to the post were frozen.^[1]^ The account was shut down as the post "insulted the People's Volunteers" fighting with the North Korean communists during the war.^[2]^ A man who posted a comment on October 8, 2021, about fried rice deemed "obnoxious" by authorities was jailed for ten days.^[2]^ He is quoted as having posted, "The greatest result of the Korean War was egg fried rice: thank you, egg fried rice! Without egg fried rice, we [China] would be no different from North Korea. Sadly, there's not that big a difference nowadays."^[4]^

Official response

Controlling posts about egg fried rice during October and November and publicly shaming those involved "is seemingly a condoned method of constructing an internet that conforms to socialist core values."^[4]^ The fried rice story involving Anying's death has never been confirmed and is said to enrage Chinese nationalists and Communist Party officials.^[5]^ The Chinese Academy of History (中国历史研究院), a state-run institute set up in 2019, denounced the fried rice story as rumors spread by those with "vicious hearts" aiming to "gravely dwarf the heroic image of Mao Anying's brave sacrifice." The academy, citing declassified documents, stated Mao's position was compromised through intercepted radio transmissions.^[6]^

This was a recipe I’ve worked off and on with for about a year. At this point it is consistent, easy, and always the winner of any work potluck or social soirée.

——

Ingredient List:

——

Chocolate chips 8oz

Butterscotch chips 4oz

Crushed roasted peanuts 4oz

Flour 3 cups

Butter 2 sticks

White Sugar 1 cup

Brown Sugar 1 cup

Eggs x2

Baking soda 1 teaspoon

Vanilla Extract 1-3 teaspoons

Salt 1 tablespoon (thanks, @Aisha!)

——

Instructions

——

Step 1: blend sugars and butter together. Make your life easier by leaving out two sticks of butter overnight or at least for a few hours.

Step 2: mix in eggs, salt, vanilla extract, and baking soda (i dissolve it in a teaspoon of water before adding it)

Step 3: add flour, nuts and chips, mix for only as long as there aren’t flour clumps.

Step 4: roll into 1-1.5 inch. (I’m not exact with this at all and haven’t had a consistency issue)

Step 5 (optional): refrigerate for half an hour to an hour. The benefit of refrigerating is that it allows the flour to properly absorb the butter, meaning the cookies won’t spread while baking. So if you prefer disc cookies, skip this step. If you like them fat, refrigerate

Step 6: Bake on top rack for 12/13 minutes. 12 minutes is fine if you skipped the last step.

Step 7 (optional): Remove them from the baking sheet to let them cool unless you want a crisper cookie OR if the batch came out too white.

That’s it! Enjoy.

Write a poem to a hottie and deliver this with it and they’ll be e.e cumming all over your peepee/clit.

I'm celebrating Texas finally starting to get hot this year by cooking up a big pot of heretical chili.

This chili is considered blasphemous due to the beans - despite this, I have tricked enough Texan coworkers to abandon their morals and win one of those goofy office chili cookoffs with this recipe before I became a pale WFH shut-in.

This makes a ton of chili, and a ton of delicious leftovers. I'll usually put some aside in flattened ziploc bags to freeze for later.

You will need:

5 qt Dutch Oven

Food processor

You could also theoretically throw this all into an instant pot for an hour and get similar results, but I enjoy slowly letting my house smell delicious.

VEGETABLES

• 1 diced onion

• 2-3 chopped celery stalks

• 1 diced bell pepper

• 3-4 cloves minced garlic

MEATS

• 1 lb ground beef

• 1 lb italian sausage (not in casing)

• 6 oz bacon, chopped into bits (about half of a pack)

MISC

• 2 14.5 oz cans "chili beans" (can use kidney instead if desired)

• 2 15.5 oz. cans diced tomatoes

• 6 oz tomato paste

• 1 can "chipotles en adobo/chipotles adobado"

• 2 beef bouillon cubes

• 1/4 cup beer - I usually use guiness or blue moon, but any non-crazy beer should work.

• 1 1/2 tsp worchestershire sauce

SPICES

• 2 tbsp chili powder

• 1 1/2 tsp oregano

• 1 tsp cumin

• 1/2 tsp basil

• 1/2 tsp salt

• 1/2 tsp pepper

• 1/2 tsp cayenne powder

• 1/2 tsp paprika

• 1/2 tsp sugar

1. Throw everything listed under spices together in a small container and set aside.

2. Throw the chopped bacon, beef, and italian sausage into the pot and allow to cook until the ground meat is browned. Once this is completed, drain the meat and set aside. Keep small amount of fat in the pot.

3. Add onion to pot - stir often and at a higher temperature to allow it to brown. Once the onion has started to brown, turn the heat back down a little and throw in celery, bell pepper, and garlic.

4. Open can of chiles en adobo - take out 1 pepper and scrape out as much of the adobo sauce as you can into a food processor. You can use more peppers if you'd like, but I'd recommend starting with one. Mix the 1 pepper & sauce together until the pepper is fully blended into the sauce.

5. Add the cooked meat to the pot of vegetables.

6. Add the pureed chile sauce and beer.

7. Add the spice mix you set aside in the first step.

8. Add beans, tomato paste, diced tomatoes, and worchestershire.

9. Add bouillon cubes. These will dissolve as the chili cooks. Stir everything together until well mixed.

10. Turn heat down to low, cover pot, and allow to cook for about 4 hours. Stir occasionally to make sure nothing gets stuck to the bottom.

It will taste insanely good the next day after cooling -> reheating.

During grilling season, I'll add a grilled chopped serrano with the vegetables.

Butter tarts are kind of like Canada's version of a pecan pie, it's the same kind of syrupy filling but instead of pecans you use raisins. Whether butter tarts should be firm like this or liquidy like this is very controversial, my dad kicks it up a notch by liking them so liquid-y they're barely set. These are a terrible thing to make if you have to transport them 8 hours and then somehow stuff them in a stocking FYI

His favourite recipe was my great grandma's which has no eggs so it has a liquid-y style filling, to make them firmer like the ones you get in the store just add 1 egg to this recipe and cook them an additional 2-5 minutes. The ones in the bottom of this photo are made with egg and are firmer and have more of a crust compared to the ones without egg in the top rows.

For 30 tarts:

30 tart shells (I've been using @JoyceChristmasCarolOates pie crust for most pies lately and it's great https://rdrama.net/h/food/post/155590/chicken-pot-pie-marseyblackpeepee but these are just store bought because muffin tins make them slightly too large for my tastes and I don't have tart tins)

1/2 cup raisins

2/3 cup butter

1 cup corn syrup

1 cup brown sugar, packed

2 tsp vanilla extract

1/4 tsp salt

1. Preheat oven to 450 F

2. Put a few raisins in each tart shell

3. Cream your butter and sugar together, then add your corn syrup, vanilla extract, and salt, and mix until smooth. If you're adding an egg to make it firmer, add it here

4. Put in the oven for 10 minutes or until they're as browned as you like, they will firm up as they cool. The ones in my photos were both baked for 10 minutes.

PS. cats seem to really like these so if you knock half of yours on the floor like I did, your Marsey can help clean up bonus picture of my assistant

they hated Her because She told the truth pic.twitter.com/X7ZkwbSnbT

— Senator J.D. Vyvanse (R-OH) (@bonethirty) March 16, 2023

This gon sound petty as heck but if that TikTok girl can call us chicken washers and seasoning police I refuse to feel guilty for saying palm colored people, hueless wonders, paperwhites, melanin redacted or snow roach

"Bleach courses through Velaryon chicken. Our dish soap runs thick. Our seasoning excessive. And our meat must never go unwashed."

Lawry's and Dish Soap

New Slur Just Dropped

White ppl not seasoning their food actually rly is based in racism & classism lol...

Free school lunch and prison food is not whypipo food, sweaty

Who cares what a white woman has to say about seasoning

“The seasoning police” is code for “Nick Gurr” btw…

I need to marry her. Our children would achieve racism levels not seen in a thousand years.

everybody knows who commits all the crime, all the r*pe and murder and i’m not afraid to say it…it’s those darn seasoning police

wakeup babe, new nazi talking point just dropped

yt pipo so racist

The real Asian Street Food was not the Michelin Bib Gourmand awarded Oyster Omelettes I had in the morning

Nor a similarly Michelin awarded pork innards noodle soup that seemed to be hit so hard by inflation that they served us this in a huge bowl (we paid extra for the egg too)

But the random unsung street hawker hero you'll find at a random 7-11 or convenience store all around Asia (except Singapore because ) in the wee hours

Who might be smoking and talking shit with his buddies at the side but still notices you looking and asks you for your order

Whose menu probably made in notepad is simply "chicken", "pork", "beef", "seafood" with rice or one of the 819 types of asian noodles

Who then whips up the obvious choice of seafood instant noodles on the grill and tells you to frick off to the 7-11 first if you don't like to wait

Whose fricking culinary masterpiece hits you right in the nose when you take it out of the takeaway bag and into a proper bowl

Who mogs your cooking because your supper avoidant wife finishes half the bowl when you offer her a bite

Whose mastery of cooking 4 types of proteins with 820 types of carbs you'll never beat because you were never from the favelas

Sadly the only proof I have of him existing is this random chopstick, wedge of lime and random thai/asian seasonings in a non-descript plastic bag, but IYKYK

This post is fricking gay and unnecessary but enveloped my soul as I had the first REAL asian street food meal ever since fricking covid broke

And I still vividly remember it being a warm and comforting bowl of congee that I had while severely hungover/drunk in Phnom Penh a couple hours or five after midnight

That's why I know how to make congee: https://rdrama.net/h/food/post/229447/marseyitsoverwerebackchingchon-chiobus-silky-cantonese-congee-recipe

They even help to keep Asians relatively slim because:

• The serving sizes are just perfect

• 50% of the time it'll give you the shits anyway

!goyslopenjoyers plz try the asian goyslop if you ever come across it

God I feel like just taking that walk down a dark alleyway just to order another bowl right now

Neighbour did I really longpost over a $5 bowl of instant noodles

Worth it

Frick it I'll just do it for the pics brb

They were literally just cleaning up when I reached FRICK

AT LEAST I have some more proof of his existence

And the name of his stall is literally just "pad thai" bro I love you but that's not gonna help even if your genius was operating in Finland or something

But at the end of the day the absolute balls to call yourself "pad thai" because you know that you're the best and deserve it

Ok I'm going to bed sad now because it's like some love story where you missed "the one" by 5 minutes due to longposting on a orange cat enjoying homo forum good night

Also I should have lied that the noodles had thai estradiol or something so the !jannies would pin my effortpost but alas I guess that would be too many posts for their tastes thanks

Lmao suddenly thought of the "Sorrowful Rice" dish

went back tonight and was shocked but not really surprised that it was packed full of locals another testament to the chef's skills

gonna dig in now with some thai whisky for the full thai experience too, the place also makes oyster omelettes so I had to try since the Michelin ones were pretty meh

Update: Pad thai was amazing as usual and they should stick to that IMO oyster omelette tasted bad to me but maybe that's their style since I didn't like the other ones too the noodles though O M G

edit: alcohol purchase hours are so weird here because you're allowed to buy booze from 11am onwards till midnight except for a 3 hour period between 2-5 pm lol

something to take note of if you ever come to thailand

Recipe here: https://www.delish.com/cooking/recipe-ideas/recipes/a53818/easy-crock-pot-chicken-and-dumplings-recipe

My girlfriend (male) doesn't like it even though she likes the taste of c*m and it has the same consistency. She's out of town visiting family alone since we're back together but not that back together if you know what I'm saying.

Anyway, made this for myself and the hot neighbor.

Hi rdrama!!! A few days ago I made this comment about my mom's shrimp scampi recipe and so I asked her if I could make it over this Christmas season to show you strags unfortunately she got me an extra pound of shrimp to feed the whole family so the proportions are a little skewed, but nevertheless I'll show my process here!!

Starting with the shrimp, I have three pounds of 31/40 count/pound raw shrimp. Cut open the bags, pour them into a pot and let cold water run over them while you do other stuff. The shrimp need to thaw, but if you leave them out in the open air they get pink and grow bacteria and shit

In the above picture is everything for the sauce itself—a half stick of butter, one and a half onions, two garlic cloves, two lemons, parsley, salt and pepper. I ended up needing to add an extra lemon and quarter stick of butter later on because the sauce reduced too much, but these proportions should be fine if you're not r-slurred like me

Start by turning the fire down low and chopping up the butter into slices so it melts easier. Put a few of the slices in just to grease the pot, and while those melt dice the onions. Put the onions in once done and stir periodically.

Now it's time to focus on the garlic. Garlic is really finicky because it's such an intense flavor, so dice it really finely. Additionally, we want the onions to be translucent before we add the garlic—I also tend to add the rest of the butter at this point just to ease its entry. This is all because if garlic burns it will frick your entire dish, so don't let it happen

Now that the garlic is added, time for the lemons! I like to zest into the sauce before squeezing, since it adds extra lemon taste and makes squeezing it easier. After that, chop them in half and squeeze them for every last drop. Don't let the seeds get in of course, they're very bitter.

This is about the time I realized I needed more juice and butter. The sauce should look pretty liquidy at this point and I just didn't have it right. Anyway, all that's left to do is add the parsley, salt, and pepper!

It's beautiful turn it off now so it doesn't burn while you do other things.

Anyway, now for the rice. I like to use a cup of rice for every pound of shrimp, meaning three cups of rice and six cups of water. Rinse the rice beforehand (local chinx pls bestow your wisdom, I seem to half butt this part every time and idk what I'm doing wrong). Then, put it into a pot with the six cups of water, bring it to a boil with the top on and then move it to a simmer burner for 22 minutes. We're not going to just be waiting that whole time though—did you forget about the shrimp??

The shrimp need to be peeled as such, and then cooked in the sauce until they turn pink.

By this time, the rice should certainly be done! Simply add it, stir and mix really well until it's all mixed and the rice has soaked all the sauce up. With that, you have shrimp scampi!

That's all for now

@Gruench @X !effortposters

I do a few variations but here's what I did tonight and really it works for pretty much any kind of instant noodle. For this one I used the king of instant noodles, Indomie Mi Goreng.

2 packs of noodles, one spicy and one regular

dump all the add-ins into a bowl

add a splash of rice wine vinegar, a splash of soy sauce, and chili crisp, and mix it all together

when the noodles are done boiling add a splash of the cooking water, drain the noodles, and mix them in the bowl with everything else

top with an egg fried to your preference (if I'm doing instant noodles that you add water and microwave I add an egg or two in the last 1:40 to poach)

Instant noodles are already good but a little bit of extra effort goes a long way. Just a few extra ingredients make them a lot better.

Nikujaga is an unpretentious Japanese-western fusion dish- literally just standard meat and potato stew with japanese seasoning plus some meme noodles thrown in.

I had this made for me and it was so good that I tried making it a couple weeks later. The base recipe is pretty okay and it's easy for anyone to make, but here are some modifications and notes if you do try making it:

• Non-negotiable: imo the base recipe without bonito stock/katsuo dashi is a overly-sweet stew; the reason I liked it initially is because of the subtle smokiness imparted by katsuobushi (dried tuna flakes). If you do make it, add a packet of katsuo dashi and/or use a liquid stock like so in replacement of the soy sauce (if you do use liquid stock then add soy sauce to taste if the stew isn't strong enough and cut back on the sugar- I learned my lesson with the sugar). The liquid stock is actually really good for making things taste like authentic sugoi nipponesu food. I added both the liquid stock and a packet of dashi to mine (I think the person who made it for me did the same), but if you use the liquid stock, you can decide whether or not to add a dashi packet far into the cooking process based on whether you want the stew to taste more bonito-y.

• Next time I'll add smaller amounts of sugar gradually instead of stirring a tbsp+ into the sake/mirin/soy sauce mixture, or omit the sugar entirely. The base recipe is very sweet for western tastes and doubly so if you're using a liquid stock.

• Try to get shirataki noodles/konnyaku noodles in little knots/bundles like so. The western italianx pasta-replacement ones will probably ruin the texture and you may as well omit them entirely.

• This recipe was made with thin-sliced pork belly in mind; if you're using thick (i.e. superior) slices then you should cut them into chunks and braise them in the stipulated amount of water (with a dashi packet if using) for about an hour to make it tender, then add everything else (sauté the vegetables as instructed in the recipe on a separate pan and throw them in with the rest of the ingredients) and simmer until the potatoes are cooked to your liking. If you do it this way, you may need to top off the water at some point since more cook time = more evaporation.

• Letting the potato overcook a bit and thicken the broth really furthers the comfort food sensation imo. I used some less floury spare potatoes in my attempt and it's not as good.

• A small pot apparently works fine for the proportions in the base recipe. I only used a large pot because I doubled the servings.

• I haven't tried it yet, but apparently it's standard to add a curry brick to the leftovers.

edit: The original recipe is:

Ingredients

1. 12 oz (2 packages) shirataki noodles or fresh ramen noobles

2. 1/3 cup soy sauce

3. 1/3 cup mirin

4. 1/3 cup sake

5. 1 tbsp + 1 tsp sugar

6. 2 tsp vegetable oil

7. 8 oz thinly sliced pork belly

8. 1 medium onion, sliced thin

9. 2 large yukon gold potatoes, peeled and cut into bite-sized pieces

10. 2 medium carrots, sliced into 1/2 in pieces

Steps

1. if using shirataki noodles rinse them in a colander, bring some water to a boil, then pour over the noobles to get rid of the weird smell

2. combine the soy sauce, mirin, sake, and sugar in a bowl along with 2.5 cups water; whisk to dissolve the sugar

3. heat a large pot over medium-high heat, then add vegetable oil. add pork belly and cook until the fat has rendered (don't wait for the fat to render if you're using thick-cut i.e. superior slices, just brown them), about 4 mins

4. add onion and cook until they soften, about 4 mins, then add carrot and potato and cook for another 3 mins.

5. pour the mixture in the bowl into the pot, add the shirataki noodles if using, turn the heat to medium-low, and simmer for about 20 mins or until the potatoes are cooked through

6. if using fresh ramen instead, add them to the pot about 3 mins before serving

7. serve

Sorry, the lighting in my kitchen is still ugly.

Anyway, since it's holiday season, here's a basic and extremely flexible recipe for stock you can make with leftover poultry carcasses and maybe poultry meat. Instead of making it immediately after roasting the bird, you can do it once you know how much leftover meat you're going to finish from your roast(s) so you can throw meat scraps in too. I've also included added alt instructions for making stock with cheap fresh chicken meat if you don't have carcasses.

It's incredibly easy to make stock so this more serves as a reminder that you can and should. Once you make it you should reserve it for soups or stews that really benefit from homemade stock, like caldo verde or ribollita or whatever.

Ingredients

• One large turkey carcass or 1-2 smaller poultry carcasses + as much leftover meat as you have (for this stock, I used a small turkey + duck carcass plus some leftover turkey. Turkey makes a particularly good stock)

• Alternative fresh meat stock: 1-2lb chicken feet, scrubbed and nails cut off + a family pack of wings and/or drumsticks. You can forgo the feet if you're a pussey. If you only have the carcass of one chicken or duck and no leftover meat, you can use fresh wings/drumsticks in addition to that.

• 4 little, 2 medium, or 1 huge non-red onions

• 1 big carrot or 2 little carrots

• 1 little bulb of garlic or 1/2 large bulb of garlic

• 1-2 celery stalks

• fresh herbs -- parsley is a must, but you can add whatever else you need; if you know what you're going to use the stock for then check the ingredients for it and include you think might taste good (I added thyme and sage in addition to parsley this time)

• 1 large bay leaf

• a swig of acid (i used 2 leftover lemon wedges this time; apple cider vinegar or white vinegar are fine)

• a slice or two of fresh ginger

• a few peppercorns (optional)

• 1-2 dried shiitake mushrooms (can also sub with a smaller amount of dried bolete/porcini) (optional)

• water

Instructions

• chop the onions into halves or quarters; do the same to the carrots and celery and throw into pot

• if you're using a whole bulb of garlic, halve the whole bulb and throw it all into pot; if not, peel the garlic cloves, crush or halve, and throw into pot (if you see black mold on the garlic skins then use the latter instructions even if you're adding a whole bulb)

• dump your bones and scraps into the pot, along with all of the remaining dry ingredients

• add water until it covers the bones with a swig of the acid you're using

• simmer covered for ~6 hrs, stirring every so often. Adjust dry ingredients and acid to taste if the stock tastes too mild every few hours. after a while, the meat should be falling apart and the smaller bones should get weak; I like to break the bones for extra flavor when possible.

• you can uncover and boil down the liquid if you don't think it'll fit into a container you have; just stir more frequently to make sure that nothing's sitting unboiled on the surface for too long

• after a few hours, the stock should get sticky from collagen. if it's not then you either don't have enough meat or have too much water. In this case, uncover and boil it down (though you will end up with less stock)

• once you've reached the 6 hr mark, turn off the heat, let cool, then pour it into a container through a colander

• you need to chill it so the fat rises and solidifies. skim the fat off the top when you're ready to use it. a proper homemade stock will have a consistency ranging from half-cooled jello to a rigid gelatin mold. if it's the latter then you can usually add some water when you're using the stock and it'll still taste pretty strong; if it's the former then you're more likely to have to add more stock or a bullion cube when you're using it.

If you adulterate it with water or stock, it should be good for 2 different soup/stew recipes. It should also keep for a while, though the last stock I made with carcasses from the freezer spoiled quickly.

!goyslopenjoyers

Since I'm out of GBP I gotta make dinner tonight and what's worse is I'm physically and emotionally exhausted from pulling an all nighter beating Undertale again.

Here's my perfectly balanced recipe for KD. Start with the ingredients:

• 2 boxes Kraft Dinner Mac & Cheese

• grated cheese

• margarine

• broccoli

• cheese whiz

• summer sausage

• powdered milk

Start boiling your noodles, then

melt a bunch of butter margarine

Mix the cheese sauce powder with like 1/3rd cup skim milk powder, add 3/4 cup of water and whisk it

Once the margarine is kinda melted add the cheese slurry and whisk.

Heat until it begins to thicken and add shredded cheese , keep heating and whisking until incorporated

Chop like half the meat tube into tiny pieces and fry

Nuke the frozen broccoli and chop into tiny pieces (i only add broc because mom pays me 500GBP for every meal I eat that has a serving of vegetables)

Strain noodles, add broc

Add fried sausage

Add cheese sauce

Add cheese whiz, mix well

Serve with preferred condiments